Our first days of public school after private, what I've noticed.

[Anonymous]

Well, at our public school, many parents know each other, the staff are very pleasant and friendly, and they even had a welcome back "breakfast" for parents in the gym after drop off (where we got to walk our kids to their classes). So you can't assume all public schools are the same.

[Anonymous]

For some reason many DCUM posters think that if you send your children to PS then you have to just take what you can get. I cannot understand this mentality. Set your sights high! School to home communication is very important and it says a lot about the culture of the school. Is the school a place where autonomy and critical thinking are developed in students who have a certain amount of freedom? Or, does the school have a very regimented institutional approach with little care for the individual? Why speak respectfully to the widgets in society that will comprise the working classes and need to learn to follow instructions and accustom themselves to being spoken to negatively?

Here is a link to some old but very telling research about how different public schools, within the same district, and with students of the same race but different SES, prepared their students through the structure of the school environment to occupy different places on the social ladder. It matters. The communication absolutely matters.
http://cuip.uchicago.edu/~cac/nlu/fnd504/anyon.htm

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, at our public school, many parents know each other, the staff are very pleasant and friendly, and they even had a welcome back "breakfast" for parents in the gym after drop off (where we got to walk our kids to their classes). So you can't assume all public schools are the same.

Ours, too. Lovely office staff, very positive atmosphere. It all starts with the principal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I noticed when I moved my kids from a private school to a public school:

1. Teachers and staff were uniformly supportive of my kids -- kind, gentle and understanding. They worked really hard to help my kids get where they were supposed to be and do what they were supposed to do. "Positive discipline" was the rule. That was very different from the private school, which expected kids to comply and when they didn't, there was a lot of exasperation.

2. The teachers were MUCH better trained. They had many tools in their tool box for teaching material to different kinds of kids. They had many different methods for ensuring that behavior was good.

3. We had more variety in extracurriculars and enrichment activities.

4. We had more diversity in race, ethnic background and SES.

5. We had more resources - the school has speech therapists, occupational therapists, nurses, psychologists -- to help us, if we need it.

6. The academic side was the same or better.

OP here. I agree with 2, 5, and 6.
We had more diversity at our private school, fewer academic resources. But we had nice teachers. The tuition of 35K was the deal breaker.

Just how do you define "diversity"? Rich white kids and rich "brown" kids? I can't imagine that there would be much economic diversity at a school that cost 35k.

Well rich white people and poor brown people is a toxic type of diversity.

Why do you think that "brown" kids in private school are poor? Or that white kids in private school are rich? BTW, at our private school, there were so many types of families that the diversity was much better than at Whitman.

Not the person you are quoting, but I assume that 95% of students at expensive private schools are upper middle class/rich. To me, that's not a particularly diverse environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The negativity is a real issue. We are at a really good public school with smiling teachers, administrators, etc. and a high quality of teaching but the written communication that comes from the school is terrible. BUT it was really shocking to me how much of the text in our back to school packet dealt with do not do this and do not do that. I thought the first rule of discipline and good teaching was to always be positive? Is it just that the teachers/administrators don't know how to write?

I would guess it's more that they have lots and lots of experience of parents ignoring the rules. So they want to make them clear and get it up front so there is no confusion, excuses like " I didn't see it".

Private schools have parents and kids who don't follow rules too and I am sure that the process of getting them to follow the rules is more painstaking, but it gets done. Plus the polite, cheery behavior of the staff makes everyone feel that they also have to be polite. This is true for any business. But public school are not a business. I don't mind dealing with mean government employees who don't come in contact with my kids, but the ones who do (schools) should remember that they are setting the tone.

Hmm. Why are staff at privates smiling and very friendly? So that parents will like the atmosphere, stay, and keep paying tuition.

Or they like working in a positive atmosphere free of government rules and regulations, and that doesn't tell them they are shitty teachers if they can't take kids who have no discipline or support at home and turn them into ace test takers.

Public's government regulations include mandatory master's degrees and teachers certifications. Privates have no such requirement. So many, many private school teachers couldn't teach in public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would like other people to chime in and share their thoughts.

I noticed that no one seems to really know anyone. The parents don't seem to know each other. The teachers and other staff don't know the parents (or students).

I noticed very little smiling on the part of the office staff (not necessarily a bad thing). Which makes them seem like they really don't want you to be in their office, unwelcoming.

There is a lot of negativity in the flyers and handouts. Like on the first line of a sheet for a class, "ABSOLUTELY no food or drink allowed...". Then they say what the class will be about. Rather than something like, "welcome to X class, I am happy that you chose this class...please respect our environment and refrain from bringing any food or drink in the classroom".

Reread what I bolded above. You are 100% going to ruin this experience for your kid. Kid comes home and complains, you should listen but if it is generalized (teachers are mean) or without merit or not complaint worthy you should treat it like all other things when you're raising your kid. YOU have set this up to fail big time. No question YOU left private grudgingly, want to go back ASAP, and were miserable since before school started. Good luck to your kid this year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Why do you think that "brown" kids in private school are poor? Or that white kids in private school are rich? BTW, at our private school, there were so many types of families that the diversity was much better than at Whitman.

But that's like saying "the weather was much hotter than Alaska".

Yes, there are many different kinds of diversity, but for the diversity people tend to track in schools -- socioeconomic diversity and "racial" diversity -- Whitman is pretty homogeneous. And it's likely that your private school is, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For some reason many DCUM posters think that if you send your children to PS then you have to just take what you can get. I cannot understand this mentality. Set your sights high! School to home communication is very important and it says a lot about the culture of the school. Is the school a place where autonomy and critical thinking are developed in students who have a certain amount of freedom? Or, does the school have a very regimented institutional approach with little care for the individual? Why speak respectfully to the widgets in society that will comprise the working classes and need to learn to follow instructions and accustom themselves to being spoken to negatively?

Here is a link to some old but very telling research about how different public schools, within the same district, and with students of the same race but different SES, prepared their students through the structure of the school environment to occupy different places on the social ladder. It matters. The communication absolutely matters.
http://cuip.uchicago.edu/~cac/nlu/fnd504/anyon.htm

I think it's unlikely that OP's school population is part of the widget working classes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There may be two challenges here.

In the public schools, to get beyond this negativity to see what is good.

In the private schools, to get beyond the polite office staff and fancy bathrooms to evaluate whether the education is really better than the public schools.

Yes. Yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I noticed when I moved my kids from a private school to a public school:

1. Teachers and staff were uniformly supportive of my kids -- kind, gentle and understanding. They worked really hard to help my kids get where they were supposed to be and do what they were supposed to do. "Positive discipline" was the rule. That was very different from the private school, which expected kids to comply and when they didn't, there was a lot of exasperation.

2. The teachers were MUCH better trained. They had many tools in their tool box for teaching material to different kinds of kids. They had many different methods for ensuring that behavior was good.

3. We had more variety in extracurriculars and enrichment activities.

4. We had more diversity in race, ethnic background and SES.

5. We had more resources - the school has speech therapists, occupational therapists, nurses, psychologists -- to help us, if we need it.

6. The academic side was the same or better.

OP here. I agree with 2, 5, and 6.
We had more diversity at our private school, fewer academic resources. But we had nice teachers. The tuition of 35K was the deal breaker.

Just how do you define "diversity"? Rich white kids and rich "brown" kids? I can't imagine that there would be much economic diversity at a school that cost 35k.

Well rich white people and poor brown people is a toxic type of diversity.

Why do you think that "brown" kids in private school are poor? Or that white kids in private school are rich? BTW, at our private school, there were so many types of families that the diversity was much better than at Whitman.

Not the person you are quoting, but I assume that 95% of students at expensive private schools are upper middle class/rich. To me, that's not a particularly diverse environment.

But that is the same demographic as Whitman. But Holton has more racial diversity than Whitman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There may be two challenges here.

In the public schools, to get beyond this negativity to see what is good.

In the private schools, to get beyond the polite office staff and fancy bathrooms to evaluate whether the education is really better than the public schools.

Yes. Yes.

OP here. This is the best statement!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, at our public school, many parents know each other, the staff are very pleasant and friendly, and they even had a welcome back "breakfast" for parents in the gym after drop off (where we got to walk our kids to their classes). So you can't assume all public schools are the same.

Ours, too. Lovely office staff, very positive atmosphere. It all starts with the principal.

+1 Same here. You can have a warm, welcoming experience in a public school.

Still, it is not reasonable to expect that the staff will know all the parents, just the ones they've worked with directly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, at our public school, many parents know each other, the staff are very pleasant and friendly, and they even had a welcome back "breakfast" for parents in the gym after drop off (where we got to walk our kids to their classes). So you can't assume all public schools are the same.

Ours, too. Lovely office staff, very positive atmosphere. It all starts with the principal.

+1 Same here. You can have a warm, welcoming experience in a public school.

Still, it is not reasonable to expect that the staff will know all the parents, just the ones they've worked with directly.

Ours too. Lovely community.

[Anonymous]

Private: children were taught civics, class size smaller, more recess and exercise, most teachers good, expensive.

Public: children not taught basic civics and run around indoors, class size of 26-30 kids, not enough gym/recess, teachers ok, cheap.

[Anonymous]

Just wait, it gets worse.

We did the switch and noticed the same.

Lots of parents - even in our small neighborhood public - did not know each other.

Office staff - generally rude and non smiling.

The notices that get sent home are ridiculous - "please check here that you agree to send your child dressed appropriately for the winter concert ..."

The teachers - horrible communication skills.