How to transition to spending more money

[Anonymous]

Cleaning lady 1x a week
We take one very nice vacation a year. Like a 20k safari
I sprinkle it around other places too where it will make my life easier.
I’ve gotten some beauty treatments done that make me feel nicer (Botox, lasers). Dh gets massages.

[Anonymous]

Massages or other beauty treatment
Tickets to sports, theater, shows (depending on what you care about)
Small upgrades to your everyday life - I get coffee beans delivered every two weeks from a local roaster
"Fancy" gym membership

[Anonymous]

What does matter to you? Travel? Giving to charity? A home renovation? Helping out family? Outsourcing laundry or yard work?

Personally I’d travel more / do cooler excursions, do some home renovations we’ve talked about forever, save something to have more flexibility to help kids out in future, give a sizable gift to a certain ngo I care about, order more sushi, and get guacamole on my chipotle bowl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you just didn’t spend it? Would that be so bad? How much frivolous sht do you need? What a stupid brag thread.

The point is that we don’t want frivolous stuff and aren’t inclined to buy it.

I don’t particularly want to be like Scrooge either with two lumps of coal in the fire.

Looking for the middle ground after a lifetime of being strict.

This is still a dumb thread. Basically “we have a bunch of money from our investments! How can we spend it down more or buy more expensive stuff cuz we have too much!!!???” No. You should literally grow your money pile more. Isn’t that satisfactory enough? Why spend lavishly? I get more satisfaction watching my VXUS or other smart investment decisions grow than I would buy a business class ticket that costs $1,500 more than a coach seat or a stupid Hermes bag.

Take your money and buy a condo and rent that fcker out. Play around with options. Maybe try and grow the money more for the next generation.

To be real, i feel like there are no threads started by men that are like this one. Men don’t ask this question of how can they waste their money. I feel like men don’t ask “how can I spend more on unnecessary material goods”. Sorry, I don’t know why this thread is so annoying, but it is. Invest the money. Grow it. Care about money. Stop trying to blow it. Did you even earn it or are you spending it for someone else like your spouse?

Untrue premise. My DH has the same question that I do. We discuss it. I’m the breadwinner anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you just didn’t spend it? Would that be so bad? How much frivolous sht do you need? What a stupid brag thread.

The point is that we don’t want frivolous stuff and aren’t inclined to buy it.

I don’t particularly want to be like Scrooge either with two lumps of coal in the fire.

Looking for the middle ground after a lifetime of being strict.

This is still a dumb thread. Basically “we have a bunch of money from our investments! How can we spend it down more or buy more expensive stuff cuz we have too much!!!???” No. You should literally grow your money pile more. Isn’t that satisfactory enough? Why spend lavishly? I get more satisfaction watching my VXUS or other smart investment decisions grow than I would buy a business class ticket that costs $1,500 more than a coach seat or a stupid Hermes bag.

Take your money and buy a condo and rent that fcker out. Play around with options. Maybe try and grow the money more for the next generation.

To be real, i feel like there are no threads started by men that are like this one. Men don’t ask this question of how can they waste their money. I feel like men don’t ask “how can I spend more on unnecessary material goods”. Sorry, I don’t know why this thread is so annoying, but it is. Invest the money. Grow it. Care about money. Stop trying to blow it. Did you even earn it or are you spending it for someone else like your spouse?

That’s because men have already agreed on the answers: hookers, beaches and blow

[Anonymous]

If I come into a windfall my plan is to fund a disabled sibling’s retirement, donate to a few churches where I am friends with the priest or pastor, and pay for my friend’s smart af daughter to go to law school and become my elder care attorney. that’s my dream.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you just didn’t spend it? Would that be so bad? How much frivolous sht do you need? What a stupid brag thread.

The point is that we don’t want frivolous stuff and aren’t inclined to buy it.

I don’t particularly want to be like Scrooge either with two lumps of coal in the fire.

Looking for the middle ground after a lifetime of being strict.

This is still a dumb thread. Basically “we have a bunch of money from our investments! How can we spend it down more or buy more expensive stuff cuz we have too much!!!???” No. You should literally grow your money pile more. Isn’t that satisfactory enough? Why spend lavishly? I get more satisfaction watching my VXUS or other smart investment decisions grow than I would buy a business class ticket that costs $1,500 more than a coach seat or a stupid Hermes bag.

Take your money and buy a condo and rent that fcker out. Play around with options. Maybe try and grow the money more for the next generation.

To be real, i feel like there are no threads started by men that are like this one. Men don’t ask this question of how can they waste their money. [/b]I feel like men don’t ask “how can I spend more on unnecessary material goods”.[b] Sorry, I don’t know why this thread is so annoying, but it is. Invest the money. Grow it. Care about money. Stop trying to blow it. Did you even earn it or are you spending it for someone else like your spouse?

Ah, the virtues and restraint of men. The silliness and frivolity of women. After I buy my Hermes bag, I’d like a boob job and a swim spa.

Have you not read the posts? It’s Aldi vs Whole Foods here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you just didn’t spend it? Would that be so bad? How much frivolous sht do you need? What a stupid brag thread.

The point is that we don’t want frivolous stuff and aren’t inclined to buy it.

I don’t particularly want to be like Scrooge either with two lumps of coal in the fire.

Looking for the middle ground after a lifetime of being strict.

This is still a dumb thread. Basically “we have a bunch of money from our investments! How can we spend it down more or buy more expensive stuff cuz we have too much!!!???” No. You should literally grow your money pile more. Isn’t that satisfactory enough? Why spend lavishly? I get more satisfaction watching my VXUS or other smart investment decisions grow than I would buy a business class ticket that costs $1,500 more than a coach seat or a stupid Hermes bag.

Take your money and buy a condo and rent that fcker out. Play around with options. Maybe try and grow the money more for the next generation.

To be real, i feel like there are no threads started by men that are like this one. Men don’t ask this question of how can they waste their money. I feel like men don’t ask “how can I spend more on unnecessary material goods”. Sorry, I don’t know why this thread is so annoying, but it is. Invest the money. Grow it. Care about money. Stop trying to blow it. Did you even earn it or are you spending it for someone else like your spouse?

This is not a dumb thread at all. It's an important consideration for those of us who have doggedly worked and saved for years and now find ourselves with more money/income than we've ever experienced. What I have found since I loosened up and started spending more is that the beautiful home renovation, the personal chef, the elevated travel...all of these most certainly have brought more joy to my life than watching my portfolio statement grow does. I've always been interested in financial planning and keen to leverage the power of time and compound interest. I've always "paid myself first." I still do and I still am following my savings and investment strategy. I've just let go of the pressure I've always felt that the more money I make, the more I must set aside. I've now embraced living for today much more. And it's made a meaningful impact on my family's life. It's reasonable to ponder your options when you've always been strict with yourself with money in order to build a strong financial future. Once you've taken care of that, a shift in perspective can really open a whole new world of opportunities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you just didn’t spend it? Would that be so bad? How much frivolous sht do you need? What a stupid brag thread.

The point is that we don’t want frivolous stuff and aren’t inclined to buy it.

I don’t particularly want to be like Scrooge either with two lumps of coal in the fire.

Looking for the middle ground after a lifetime of being strict.

This is still a dumb thread. Basically “we have a bunch of money from our investments! How can we spend it down more or buy more expensive stuff cuz we have too much!!!???” No. You should literally grow your money pile more. Isn’t that satisfactory enough? Why spend lavishly? I get more satisfaction watching my VXUS or other smart investment decisions grow than I would buy a business class ticket that costs $1,500 more than a coach seat or a stupid Hermes bag.

Take your money and buy a condo and rent that fcker out. Play around with options. Maybe try and grow the money more for the next generation.

To be real, i feel like there are no threads started by men that are like this one. Men don’t ask this question of how can they waste their money. I feel like men don’t ask “how can I spend more on unnecessary material goods”. Sorry, I don’t know why this thread is so annoying, but it is. Invest the money. Grow it. Care about money. Stop trying to blow it. Did you even earn it or are you spending it for someone else like your spouse?

This is not a dumb thread at all. It's an important consideration for those of us who have doggedly worked and saved for years and now find ourselves with more money/income than we've ever experienced. What I have found since I loosened up and started spending more is that the beautiful home renovation, the personal chef, the elevated travel...all of these most certainly have brought more joy to my life than watching my portfolio statement grow does. I've always been interested in financial planning and keen to leverage the power of time and compound interest. I've always "paid myself first." I still do and I still am following my savings and investment strategy. I've just let go of the pressure I've always felt that the more money I make, the more I must set aside. I've now embraced living for today much more. And it's made a meaningful impact on my family's life. It's reasonable to ponder your options when you've always been strict with yourself with money in order to build a strong financial future. Once you've taken care of that, a shift in perspective can really open a whole new world of opportunities.

OP here. Thanks for this.

I think for us in a sense the “obvious” answer I updating our home, but we know the process will be a hassle and we are also not sure how many more years we want to stay bs relocating. But you have all given me some things to think about.

[Anonymous]

Check out Ramit Sethi and figure out your money dials.

[Anonymous]

I am having a hard time with the amount of money we are spending on an upcoming milestone family trip (multiple business class seats, luxury lodges). We have never done anything like this in our entire 30+-year-marriage, but our income has doubled since Covid and we no longer have tuition to pay. Realistically, I know we will not miss the $$ on our deathbeds (or even in a year or two) and will always treasure the memories, but damn....it's not easy. We both grew up frugal and that mindset is stubborn.

[Anonymous]

This was helpful to me - Ramit Sethi’s interview with a wealthy couple that doesn’t like spending money.

The couple is probably younger than many of us, but I laughed out loud multiple times because of the similarities to things we do.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHbQQXPoSws&list=PLPZCUlZ2z01lvgC4lquCWOoVsCzTOxIqz&index=1

[Anonymous]

I can sort of understand this. We’ve never made a ton (my salary maxed around 155k and dh around 215, in our 50s) and I only started saving/working around a 29 after long grad school
Period (PhD), we had kids, bought a house etc. but compounding plus mom’s death has changed our financial picture and we could retire todayand be pretty comfortable.

I actually want to take some money and use it for a couple things but I still feel weird about it. Like I’m still in the saving mode not spending mode. I have loosened up in the small things, getting a cappuccino, paying for regular and not basic economy, but I still went to second hand store today for clothes. I can justify a car for teen drivers, I can justify camps tutoring etc and I can justify 5-10k on supporting g organizations we believe in but I can’t really bring myself to remove money from investments

Also I don’t wish to change our lifestyle except maybe travel a little more luxuriously, I’ve always been a bargain hunter but now kids get their own room etc.

[Anonymous]

Not sure if I posted when this first went up but my income drastically increased about 5 years ago and so, in that time, we saved $1M b/c we didn't spend the extra income. Now, we are financially independent but still working b/c the kids are still in compulsory school and I love my job.

I had been considering Amex Plat for awhile for travel b/c we do travel often. After my husband spend a lot of money on a long weekend in NYC, I looked at how the trip would have gone with AmEx and realized that we could have had a better trip and it could have cost less so I upgraded our travel about 2 years ago. That's been great!

Like a poster said upthread, we too are going on a very expensive family vacation this summer and the price point wasn't our choice. I'm using it as a baseline budget for future travel. I want to take both kids on a fantastic graduation trip (from highschool) and will use this trip as the baseline budget. So far it's costing the entire family (extended) 60K. I think it will top 70K once all expenses are in. This is a two-bucket in-law idea and a long trip.

But what I really want to do is update my modest SFH in near-in DC suburb. It doesn't need anything but it was last updated in the early 2000s when we purchased it. The thing is, that will involve adding an outdoor room, redoing the kitchen cabinets b/c the cheap box-parts are falling a part, all windows, the front door, should probbly redo the floor, redo one bath, at least...there's more. I have no idea where to start. I sort of feel like I need to hire a woman who'se done this already to be my spirt guide.

[Anonymous]

I had been considering Amex Plat for awhile for travel b/c we do travel often. After my husband spend a lot of money on a long weekend in NYC, I looked at how the trip would have gone with AmEx and realized that we could have had a better trip and it could have cost less so I upgraded our travel about 2 years ago. That's been great!

how does amex platinum save money?