Men who grew up with female names - how hard was it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The one guy I know personally with a gender-ambiguous/female name goes by his middle name.

But I also know a man with a perfectly normal, masculine first name who eschews that and goes by a somewhat gender ambiguous nickname (think Jamie) for his middle name, so I don't think there's any rule.

I love Jamie for a man. Dislike it as a woman's name.

[Anonymous]

I know male Courtneys and Ashleys and they are doing just fine.

[Anonymous]

Curious if this discussion will be taking place in 20 years about the current use of gender neutral names: Taylor, Cameron, Harper, etc

[Anonymous]

My uncle is a male Jan, and he never openly criticized his name, but his wife says he hated it for a long time. He didn't hate it enough to go by a middle name though.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Unisex names have been around forever - Terry, Francis/es, Erin/Aaron, Lindsey/ay, Dana, Mika/Micah, off the top of my head.

Fwiw, I think people who have last names (mom's maiden name) as their first names (Miller, Gray, Smith, Holt, - type names) have it worse.

Some of the names you're calling unisex are just homophones. Francis is a male name originating from Franciscus, Frances is a female name from the same origin; they just sound the same. Erin and Aaron aren't even remotely related to each other, they simply sound alike.

Erin and Aaron don't even sound alike unless you have a southern accent.

I’m midwestern and I pronounce them the same way. I thought only New Yorkers pronounced them differently.

I grew up in Bethesda and live in NYC now. I agree - I pronounce them the same and have always heard others do so too. It’s just people from NY/NJ who pronounce them differently.

They are pronounced identically .. Unless you are saying air-run vs. air-ren.

Perhaps it’s linguistic differences but I see a significant difference between “er-in” and “a-a-Ron.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Curious if this discussion will be taking place in 20 years about the current use of gender neutral names: Taylor, Cameron, Harper, etc

There’s less of a drastic difference in usage that it’ll be commonplace to not know the gender.

[Anonymous]

I have an uncle Ashley. His wife has literally been mistaken for Salma Hayek so I think he’s doing a-okay.

[Anonymous]

Aaron/Erin - Aaron is like the a sound in apple; Erin is like the e sound in error. You don’t say epple or air-er.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Aaron/Erin - Aaron is like the a sound in apple; Erin is like the e sound in error. You don’t say epple or air-er.

I think for those who think it's the same they are actually saying air-er...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Aaron/Erin - Aaron is like the a sound in apple; Erin is like the e sound in error. You don’t say epple or air-er.

I only hear AAR/ER in these names pronounced like “air” and RON/RIN sound like “wren”

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Unisex names have been around forever - Terry, Francis/es, Erin/Aaron, Lindsey/ay, Dana, Mika/Micah, off the top of my head.

Fwiw, I think people who have last names (mom's maiden name) as their first names (Miller, Gray, Smith, Holt, - type names) have it worse.

Some of the names you're calling unisex are just homophones. Francis is a male name originating from Franciscus, Frances is a female name from the same origin; they just sound the same. Erin and Aaron aren't even remotely related to each other, they simply sound alike.

Erin and Aaron don't even sound alike unless you have a southern accent.

I’m midwestern and I pronounce them the same way. I thought only New Yorkers pronounced them differently.

I grew up in Bethesda and live in NYC now. I agree - I pronounce them the same and have always heard others do so too. It’s just people from NY/NJ who pronounce them differently.

From New England and can't even conceive of pronouncing those names the same.

Also from New England, and same.

Aaron is AIR-un, like the air around you, with a heavy stress on "air.

Erin is Eh-rin. The stress is on the first syllable, but it's softer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Aaron/Erin - Aaron is like the a sound in apple; Erin is like the e sound in error. You don’t say epple or air-er.

You also don’t say air-ple. WTF.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Unisex names have been around forever - Terry, Francis/es, Erin/Aaron, Lindsey/ay, Dana, Mika/Micah, off the top of my head.

Fwiw, I think people who have last names (mom's maiden name) as their first names (Miller, Gray, Smith, Holt, - type names) have it worse.

Some of the names you're calling unisex are just homophones. Francis is a male name originating from Franciscus, Frances is a female name from the same origin; they just sound the same. Erin and Aaron aren't even remotely related to each other, they simply sound alike.

Erin and Aaron don't even sound alike unless you have a southern accent.

I’m midwestern and I pronounce them the same way. I thought only New Yorkers pronounced them differently.

I grew up in Bethesda and live in NYC now. I agree - I pronounce them the same and have always heard others do so too. It’s just people from NY/NJ who pronounce them differently.

From New England and can't even conceive of pronouncing those names the same.

Also from New England, and same.

Aaron is AIR-un, like the air around you, with a heavy stress on "air.

Erin is Eh-rin. The stress is on the first syllable, but it's softer.

I’ve never heard anyone even in NE (Maine and Mass) say Aaron Hernandez differently than Erin Andrews. Both names were huge news stories and office chatter for a good while.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Curious if this discussion will be taking place in 20 years about the current use of gender neutral names: Taylor, Cameron, Harper, etc

The discussion will continue and I'd argue we are even more uncomfortable with "gender neutral" names now than we were 20 or 30 years ago.

The current trend is to give girls masculine or gender neutral names, and then for parents to stop giving those names to boys because they become associated with girls. In fact the three names you mention have fallen greatly out of favor for boys specifically because they have risen in popularity for girls.

Parents are now giving girls names like James, Teddy, and Noah (though it's usually Noa for a girl, but pronounced the same), and it will be interesting to see if the popularity of these names for girls diminishes their popularity for boys.

It's also increasingly popular to give girls feminine names with masculine or gender neutral nicknames: Maxine-Max, Theodora-Theo, Samantha-Sam.

It think people are more worked up about gender and naming than ever right now, and we are far, far from some utopia where no one cares about the gender of names. Most people care a lot, and in particular there is a discomfort with femininity in names, for both boys and girls, and almost a battle over masculine-sounding names because people become uncomfortable with the association of these names with girls/femininity.

[Anonymous]

Erin/Aaron is like merry/marry/Mary. Some people hear a difference in the pronunciation of these words and others think they rhyme. I think it’s regional.