I'm not sure if this will be helpful but I feel like I can relate to your child even though I'm 49 years old. I thought I might be able to explain at least what goes through my head since it might give you some insight on what could be going through your son's head. For me I often feel like I can't cope with life, that I don't have the resiliency to handle difficult things and I feel overwhelmed and panicked. When that happens I often get suicidal ideations. It's not so much that I want to do it, but I want the pain to end and can't see another solution. Thinking about suicide gives me some relief because it's a way to end the pain. That's the OCD aspect. It gives me momentary relief to feel like I have some level of control. I'm in treatment and it has improved but I still struggle somewhat with it. Anyway, take from that what you will!
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