Send to K or Hold?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the issue is that kindergarten is too academic and it can be hard for kids to sit still. The research is so clear that play based curriculums are best for preschool, and it is a really abrupt shift to kindergarten, at least in most settings I am familiar with.

I don’t think you can decide now. I’d wait until it’s time to apply/register for K and decide based on what happens based on where your child is at that point. Although older kids often do better, plenty of young ones do fine too.

Its not too academic. Its school. Play based is not best for all kids. We removed our child from a play based preschool to a more academic one where they thrived and were prepared. People like you don't prepare their kids and then have all kinds of excuses.

Uh okay. My kids are doing great in school so I don’t need excuses. Nevertheless I thought most agreed that K these days has too much sitting, too much testing, too much pressure. I think it’s a shame but my kids have been fine thank you.

Then why not homeschool. You are making excuses and pushes others to hike back to justify your actions. Your kids are not age appropriate and that’s not healthy. I us not to much sitting and texting is necessary to make sure they are on target and don’t need extra help. How is k pressure? K is if anything very basic for those of us who worked with our kids and prepared them. I thought it was a huge waste of time as it was basically a holding grade so kids like yours could catch up to mine.

There are those of us who feel the kindergarten curriculum and structure is inappropriate for a 4 year old or just turned 5 year old, especially when the expectations are compared to kids who are an entire year older than they are. We don’t think it’s appropriate to have to “prepare” a 3 year old to enter kindergarten at 4 and sit all day.

+1, though not even from a redshirting perspective. My kid was 5.5 (so no question about the age cutoff) and she tested 98% for math, so she was academically more than ready and has been fine in school. That said, I disagree with the kindergarten curriculum. There should be more play. Sitting all day is hard at that age, and more time sitting does not actually improve their longterm academic performance. Unfortunately my daughter reported that they got a bunch of brain breaks that were screen time. It was disappointing to me to see my kid go from loving preK to being super bored in kindergarten.

School is for learning. They can play before school, after school and on weekends.

My kids have been fine, but I think overall when you make school a place where kids want to be, they learn more and do better. I strongly disagree with the idea that more is more when it comes to time spent sitting or looking at iPads.

[Anonymous]

Do you want your 13 year old in high school
With 19 year olds? It’s not about K it’s the older ages. Wouldn’t you want another year with her vs sending her to college at 17?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the issue is that kindergarten is too academic and it can be hard for kids to sit still. The research is so clear that play based curriculums are best for preschool, and it is a really abrupt shift to kindergarten, at least in most settings I am familiar with.

I don’t think you can decide now. I’d wait until it’s time to apply/register for K and decide based on what happens based on where your child is at that point. Although older kids often do better, plenty of young ones do fine too.

Its not too academic. Its school. Play based is not best for all kids. We removed our child from a play based preschool to a more academic one where they thrived and were prepared. People like you don't prepare their kids and then have all kinds of excuses.

Uh okay. My kids are doing great in school so I don’t need excuses. Nevertheless I thought most agreed that K these days has too much sitting, too much testing, too much pressure. I think it’s a shame but my kids have been fine thank you.

Then why not homeschool. You are making excuses and pushes others to hike back to justify your actions. Your kids are not age appropriate and that’s not healthy. I us not to much sitting and texting is necessary to make sure they are on target and don’t need extra help. How is k pressure? K is if anything very basic for those of us who worked with our kids and prepared them. I thought it was a huge waste of time as it was basically a holding grade so kids like yours could catch up to mine.

There are those of us who feel the kindergarten curriculum and structure is inappropriate for a 4 year old or just turned 5 year old, especially when the expectations are compared to kids who are an entire year older than they are. We don’t think it’s appropriate to have to “prepare” a 3 year old to enter kindergarten at 4 and sit all day.

+1, though not even from a redshirting perspective. My kid was 5.5 (so no question about the age cutoff) and she tested 98% for math, so she was academically more than ready and has been fine in school. That said, I disagree with the kindergarten curriculum. There should be more play. Sitting all day is hard at that age, and more time sitting does not actually improve their longterm academic performance. Unfortunately my daughter reported that they got a bunch of brain breaks that were screen time. It was disappointing to me to see my kid go from loving preK to being super bored in kindergarten.

School is for learning. They can play before school, after school and on weekends.

My kids have been fine, but I think overall when you make school a place where kids want to be, they learn more and do better. I strongly disagree with the idea that more is more when it comes to time spent sitting or looking at iPads.

Its ironic parents complain their kids are on ipads when they spend so much time online posting. Its K, its about learning. They can play at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you want your 13 year old in high school
With 19 year olds? It’s not about K it’s the older ages. Wouldn’t you want another year with her vs sending her to college at 17?

A week before she turns 18!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you want your 13 year old in high school
With 19 year olds? It’s not about K it’s the older ages. Wouldn’t you want another year with her vs sending her to college at 17?

My freshman was taking classes with juniors and seniors... why would you hold back a child from school bearing SN? Most of these kids would be turning 18 and a few weeks makes no difference. You don't make your kids smarter by holding them back, you are dumbing them down by not having them with age and grade-appropriate peers. Your kid is older, they are not a leader, as they are older and not true peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My apologies for just scanning this thread overall, but I wanted to add a dissenting voice that I am so glad my parents sent me to school (late December birthday with a 5 by 1/1 kindergarten cut off) instead of holding me. I did feel small and young in early elementary school, but it was a non-issue later on. Girls are developmentally ready earlier than boys, and I would have been frustrated and bored in class with boys a year younger than I was. I liked finishing college at 21, having my masters at 22, and buying a condo at 25. Getting launched early had financial and social benefits for me.

This is irrelevant in today’s educational landscape

Actually its a very appropriate comment and they are in the situation and saying how they felt. Why are you dismissing it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My apologies for just scanning this thread overall, but I wanted to add a dissenting voice that I am so glad my parents sent me to school (late December birthday with a 5 by 1/1 kindergarten cut off) instead of holding me. I did feel small and young in early elementary school, but it was a non-issue later on. Girls are developmentally ready earlier than boys, and I would have been frustrated and bored in class with boys a year younger than I was. I liked finishing college at 21, having my masters at 22, and buying a condo at 25. Getting launched early had financial and social benefits for me.

I'll agree with you on the other end. I missed the cutoff by 2 days (private was an option to get around this) and being the oldest in my grade who hadn't been intentionally held was horrible socially and academically. I was bored and played babysitter for years with some of those boys. This sounds dramatic but the decision not to push was probably my parent's worst parenting decision. As it were, I left for greener pastures at 15 so they didn't even get that extra time they thought they would. I would be very hesitant to hold back a socially and academically mature and advanced girl. It sucked!

Its usually more about the parents and not wanting to put in the effort vs. the child.

[Anonymous]

There is SO much time between now and then. This kid is 3 FFS!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My apologies for just scanning this thread overall, but I wanted to add a dissenting voice that I am so glad my parents sent me to school (late December birthday with a 5 by 1/1 kindergarten cut off) instead of holding me. I did feel small and young in early elementary school, but it was a non-issue later on. Girls are developmentally ready earlier than boys, and I would have been frustrated and bored in class with boys a year younger than I was. I liked finishing college at 21, having my masters at 22, and buying a condo at 25. Getting launched early had financial and social benefits for me.

This is irrelevant in today’s educational landscape

Actually its a very appropriate comment and they are in the situation and saying how they felt. Why are you dismissing it?

I'm the person who posted about appreciating not being held. There were plenty of kids who were held then too, so I always had classmates who were a year plus older than I was. I liked being younger; it actually increased my confidence in myself, pushed me to work hard, and diminished the gender gap that is so prominent. Holding a younger boy might be a different conversation. Girls go through puberty a couple of years before guys, which totally impacts brain maturity. My brother was old for his grade but less ready for school at every grade despite being a year older than I was.

[Anonymous]

My DH and I were both very young for grade and were sent on time (both August birthdays with a Sept-ish cutoff where we each grew up).

When planning for our own kids, this topic came up. We both strongly agreed on holding any potential late birthdays kids back a grade. Why? We both did well academically (no issues there) but both felt we would’ve benefitted socially from being a bit older. Especially DH, who was physically a very late bloomer.

That said, it isn’t something we sit around stewing about etc. either. We both turned out fine.

In the end, our kids were all older birthdays for grade, and obviously sent on time without needing to think any further.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hold. I so regret sending my 7 yo son with a mid/late August birthday on time. His teacher has recommended getting him evaluated for ADHD because of his behavior at school and his immaturity, and if he does have it, letting him stay another year would have been so beneficial.

It's actually worse for ADHD kids who are a full year older than everyone else. They act out more because they are bored. You made the right decision.

What about kids with inattentive ADHD? I don't think it would be easier for them to be a year younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My apologies for just scanning this thread overall, but I wanted to add a dissenting voice that I am so glad my parents sent me to school (late December birthday with a 5 by 1/1 kindergarten cut off) instead of holding me. I did feel small and young in early elementary school, but it was a non-issue later on. Girls are developmentally ready earlier than boys, and I would have been frustrated and bored in class with boys a year younger than I was. I liked finishing college at 21, having my masters at 22, and buying a condo at 25. Getting launched early had financial and social benefits for me.

This is irrelevant in today’s educational landscape

Actually its a very appropriate comment and they are in the situation and saying how they felt. Why are you dismissing it?

I'm the person who posted about appreciating not being held. There were plenty of kids who were held then too, so I always had classmates who were a year plus older than I was. I liked being younger; it actually increased my confidence in myself, pushed me to work hard, and diminished the gender gap that is so prominent. Holding a younger boy might be a different conversation. Girls go through puberty a couple of years before guys, which totally impacts brain maturity. My brother was old for his grade but less ready for school at every grade despite being a year older than I was.

I’m a female who was held and I feel the exact same things about the benefits afforded to me by being the oldest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hold. I so regret sending my 7 yo son with a mid/late August birthday on time. His teacher has recommended getting him evaluated for ADHD because of his behavior at school and his immaturity, and if he does have it, letting him stay another year would have been so beneficial.

It's actually worse for ADHD kids who are a full year older than everyone else. They act out more because they are bored. You made the right decision.

What about kids with inattentive ADHD? I don't think it would be easier for them to be a year younger.

Being the youngest did absolutely zero favors in preschool for my son with adhd. We held him back so he would start kindergarten at 5 going on 6 instead of 4 going on 5.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hold. I so regret sending my 7 yo son with a mid/late August birthday on time. His teacher has recommended getting him evaluated for ADHD because of his behavior at school and his immaturity, and if he does have it, letting him stay another year would have been so beneficial.

It's actually worse for ADHD kids who are a full year older than everyone else. They act out more because they are bored. You made the right decision.

What about kids with inattentive ADHD? I don't think it would be easier for them to be a year younger.

Being the youngest did absolutely zero favors in preschool for my son with adhd. We held him back so he would start kindergarten at 5 going on 6 instead of 4 going on 5.

What did you do to treat the adhd! Maybe the preschool was the problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My apologies for just scanning this thread overall, but I wanted to add a dissenting voice that I am so glad my parents sent me to school (late December birthday with a 5 by 1/1 kindergarten cut off) instead of holding me. I did feel small and young in early elementary school, but it was a non-issue later on. Girls are developmentally ready earlier than boys, and I would have been frustrated and bored in class with boys a year younger than I was. I liked finishing college at 21, having my masters at 22, and buying a condo at 25. Getting launched early had financial and social benefits for me.

This is irrelevant in today’s educational landscape

Actually its a very appropriate comment and they are in the situation and saying how they felt. Why are you dismissing it?

I'm the person who posted about appreciating not being held. There were plenty of kids who were held then too, so I always had classmates who were a year plus older than I was. I liked being younger; it actually increased my confidence in myself, pushed me to work hard, and diminished the gender gap that is so prominent. Holding a younger boy might be a different conversation. Girls go through puberty a couple of years before guys, which totally impacts brain maturity. My brother was old for his grade but less ready for school at every grade despite being a year older than I was.

I’m a female who was held and I feel the exact same things about the benefits afforded to me by being the oldest.

Why would you have to work harder? You were older so it should come easier.