Send to K or Hold?

[Anonymous]

Let me preface this by saying I am not looking to start a debate about redshirting. Our decision on when to send DD to Kindergarten will be driven by what school we decide to send her to.

DD is currently 3 YO with an August birthday. Her birthday is 10 days before our local public school cutoff. We may send DD to public school, but our first choice would likely be to send her to a private school. The private school does not have a hard age cutoff for K, but they almost always tell 4 YOs with mid-late summer birthdays (especially August birthdays) to come back next year to apply for K.

DD will likely do fine in K as one of the youngest, although I’m sure she would benefit from being on the older end of the class. If we were set on sending her to public school, we’d send her on time. However, since the private school is our first choice, we’re considering holding her back to try out chances with private school admissions. We’re hopeful she’d get in (I’m an alum of the school), but that’s obviously not guaranteed. And it would seem kind of silly if we held her back and then she ended up at public school anyway. Has anyone else been in this situation? WWYD?

FWIW, we’re going to start the private school application process this fall but are fully expecting to be told to wait another year.

[Anonymous]

Can she read yet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let me preface this by saying I am not looking to start a debate about redshirting. Our decision on when to send DD to Kindergarten will be driven by what school we decide to send her to.

DD is currently 3 YO with an August birthday. Her birthday is 10 days before our local public school cutoff. We may send DD to public school, but our first choice would likely be to send her to a private school. The private school does not have a hard age cutoff for K, but they almost always tell 4 YOs with mid-late summer birthdays (especially August birthdays) to come back next year to apply for K.

DD will likely do fine in K as one of the youngest, although I’m sure she would benefit from being on the older end of the class. If we were set on sending her to public school, we’d send her on time. However, since the private school is our first choice, we’re considering holding her back to try out chances with private school admissions. We’re hopeful she’d get in (I’m an alum of the school), but that’s obviously not guaranteed. And it would seem kind of silly if we held her back and then she ended up at public school anyway. Has anyone else been in this situation? WWYD?

FWIW, we’re going to start the private school application process this fall but are fully expecting to be told to wait another year.

I think you can ask this upfront of the admissions staff.

I also think you can send her to K in public school, and then apply out and make it known you're open to having her repeat K.

Just to add a couple more options.

[Anonymous]

Hold.

[Anonymous]

More so if its a minority kid.

[Anonymous]

You think she’ll be ready at 5 but you’ll hold her back because the school suggests it? What’s so great about this school?
I think it’s nuts to try and decide now too when your kid is 3.
The decision to hold back is personal and should not be up to the school. Only way I’d let the school have a say is if DD was in their preschool program and that teacher who had firsthand knowledge of my kid suggested it.

[Anonymous]

Hold. I so regret sending my 7 yo son with a mid/late August birthday on time. His teacher has recommended getting him evaluated for ADHD because of his behavior at school and his immaturity, and if he does have it, letting him stay another year would have been so beneficial.

[Anonymous]

Almost all modern research done with the current kindergarten curriculum points to kids, boys especially but all kids, doing drastically better at 6 rather than 5. Statistically, 5 year olds struggle an unnecessary amount more than 6 year olds.

And yes, DCUM poster whose 5 year old did *fantastic* in K and who can never ever ever IMAGINE someone making a different decision, we have heard you. Over and over again. Your anecdotal experience is not relevant when there is a plethora of data available.

[Anonymous]

Hold.

[Anonymous]

I agree - hold.

[Anonymous]

I’d hold her until next year

[Anonymous]

I held back both my August bday kids. Zero regrets. I'm also a former teacher, I've seen/heard a lot of regret from parents who sent "on time" when they had the reasonable option to hold back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Almost all modern research done with the current kindergarten curriculum points to kids, boys especially but all kids, doing drastically better at 6 rather than 5. Statistically, 5 year olds struggle an unnecessary amount more than 6 year olds.

And yes, DCUM poster whose 5 year old did *fantastic* in K and who can never ever ever IMAGINE someone making a different decision, we have heard you. Over and over again. Your anecdotal experience is not relevant when there is a plethora of data available.

Of course they do. A year in development is a year in development at that age. Maybe the US needs to start K at 6, but then kids would start at 8.of course a year in development makes a difference.

[Anonymous]

I’m sending mine to K at just turned 5 because I don’t think another year of pre-K would feel right or like the right challenge, I guess. I’d rather repeat K if we need to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You think she’ll be ready at 5 but you’ll hold her back because the school suggests it? What’s so great about this school?
I think it’s nuts to try and decide now too when your kid is 3.
The decision to hold back is personal and should not be up to the school. Only way I’d let the school have a say is if DD was in their preschool program and that teacher who had firsthand knowledge of my kid suggested it.

NP. It is pretty typical for privates to have an informal cutoff for kindergarten in the spring. The last private I worked at had a stated requirement that kids reach their 5th birthday by Sept. 1, which matched our state public requirement. But in practice, kids with spring and summer birthdays were offered admissions to the transitional kindergarten program and/or told to try again next year.