If you have older kids in college now

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can set it up for certain numbers to ring through DND.

I sleep with an EarPod in with white noise (dog and DH snore) and have received calls from college kids. Good news, drunken butt dials.

In a true emergency, your kid might not be calling from their own phone. If they were mugged and their phone was stolen, or in ca car accident and their phone fell over a cliff or into a lake, they could be calling from a friend's phone.

I would hope my kids would be smart enough to dial 911 in such a situation. WTF am I going to do for them?

Talk to them? If your 18 year old kid gets mugged, you don't want them to tell you?

I hope they have enough sense to call 911 instead of mommy first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How many calls are some of you getting that you need to put your phone on DND overnight? The only time my phone rings overnight is in a true emergency.

it's not calls, it's texts, emails, ring camera, etc. The buzzing phone wakes me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have my kids and husband set to breakthrough do not disturb so if they need to reach me they can

And if your kids or husband's phone gets lost or stolen and they borrow a friend's phone, they won't be able to get through.

Correct. But their phone will still be missing in the morning, and we can talk them.

Time to cut the cord - literally!

I got a sports injury that sent me to the college ER when I was a freshman. I had turned eighteen about a month earlier, so I handled it with support from coaches. I called my parents with the story in the morning. Before cell phones, that was expected, and I think it is healthier than the expectation that you call mom for everything your whole life.

My college freshmen did this recently with appendicitis. But, as he says, he was getting horrible medical advice--from the college health center and the call line at the hospital. I told him to always trust his instincts. He did call to tell me they told him to wait, go back to his dorm---come see the ER on Monday, etc., etc.,....all of this could have proved fatal. He got in an uber and went to the ER---had surgery..and when it was infected and they said 'well you don't have a fever'...this can wait---again had to make the decision that a surgical wound oozing stink foul copious amounts was not normal--even though the call center for both the hospital and the call center told him it was not an infection without a fever and wait until after the weekend. Again---went to the ER needed CT scan immediately, etc. Determined there was indeed an infection at the surgical cite--had to cut a stitch, drain it, IV antibiotics.

Anyone that knows about wound care knows that could have turned into sepsis incredibly quickly---BUT MOST 18-19 year old college freshmen are not going to have the fortitude or knowledge to do all of this. I am lucky my kid is very mature for a 19-year old and very confident--but still I had to acknowledge---yes--DO NOT LISTEN TO THE HEALTH CLINIC NURSE ON CAMPUS---OR THE HEALTHLINE. You know it's not normal--you go get it seen.

So the cut the cord--yeah---whatever---my kid is 100% independent, but the very sad state of our healthcare system is you need to advocate for yourself---and you need more than you own set of eyes on the problem.

This was not on my radar at all. My kids at most their entire life had one bout of strep throat---never missed more than a day of school their whole lives...so I would have thought like others a medical emergency would not happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have my kids and husband set to breakthrough do not disturb so if they need to reach me they can

And if your kids or husband's phone gets lost or stolen and they borrow a friend's phone, they won't be able to get through.

I think you have anxiety and this is not a normal thing to worry about. I am not being snarky, I just can't imagine living in this level of "what if" and feel for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can set it up for certain numbers to ring through DND.

I sleep with an EarPod in with white noise (dog and DH snore) and have received calls from college kids. Good news, drunken butt dials.

In a true emergency, your kid might not be calling from their own phone. If they were mugged and their phone was stolen, or in ca car accident and their phone fell over a cliff or into a lake, they could be calling from a friend's phone.

For this very reason, and others, you can set your iPhone to un-silence any calls from a same number occurring within 3 minutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have my kids and husband set to breakthrough do not disturb so if they need to reach me they can

And if your kids or husband's phone gets lost or stolen and they borrow a friend's phone, they won't be able to get through.

I think you have anxiety and this is not a normal thing to worry about. I am not being snarky, I just can't imagine living in this level of "what if" and feel for you.

I think it’s weird that you think I have anxiety because I don’t put my phone on dnd

[Anonymous]

As someone with a sophomore college student who is currently studying abroad, you have to become more comfortable being less in touch. It's really uncomfortable at first, but it's part of the process. For those reading this with high school kids, start in their Jr/Sr year with letting them have more independence. Get rid of the Life 360, don't check in all the time, assume that if they leave for work/school and you don't hear anything that they made it there without a problem. Then when they're away at college and you don't hear from them for a week, you won't be as nervous.

[Anonymous]

For those of you asking about calls overnight, yes, there are calls and texts - I usually silence my phone when I go to bed.

When my kid goes to college, I will have to make an exception for kid's number but will still silence my phone.

Texts come at various hours....ppl don't hold off on texts based on time ...in the olden days, no one called on the land line after a certain hour so it was no issue to leave the ringer on all night. Now, it's an issue - ppl are awake too late or awake too early and texting plus way more spam calling.

[Anonymous]

Parents and kids somehow survived the college years before cell phones. I was an international student on financial aid and had no way to call my parents if there was an emergency. It’s all fine. Give your kids credit for being resilient and resourceful. They are fully capable of figuring things out if they can’t reach you immediately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can set it up for certain numbers to ring through DND.

I sleep with an EarPod in with white noise (dog and DH snore) and have received calls from college kids. Good news, drunken butt dials.

In a true emergency, your kid might not be calling from their own phone. If they were mugged and their phone was stolen, or in ca car accident and their phone fell over a cliff or into a lake, they could be calling from a friend's phone.

For this very reason, and others, you can set your iPhone to un-silence any calls from a same number occurring within 3 minutes.

DP. How do you do this? Thanks!

[Anonymous]

A year later. How has it been for the PARENTS to current freshmen?

[Anonymous]

My college kids use the find my phone alert to get my attention in an urgent situation. Otherwise I keep my phone on silent 24-7.

[Anonymous]

I know have 2 kids in college and just started bringing my phone into my room at night. Before, i left it in the kitchen. I actually did it more because of my elderly mom than my kids.

I set it on DND but anything from my kids and my mom are set to "breakthrough" that. I only just got it imbedded into my kids' brains to not text me with stupid things like "I just found the cutest dress for my formal" or "I miss the dog" after 10pm.

[Anonymous]

I use the focus feature on my Apple iPhone where I only allow overnight notifications from my college kids and elderly parents. On very rare occasions, my college kid will text me at 12 AM with some random thing they didn’t want to forget to mention. Emergencies do come up, and I would much rather deal with the occasional wake up from a text than missing a true emergency by either my college kid or my elderly parents. Simple solution.

[Anonymous]

Who do you all get calls and texts from in the middle of the night?

I have what I consider a large circle of friends and family (I'd say I get 50 social texts per day) but no one ever calls or texts after 10pm. We're all sleeping and respect an unwritten rule. I'm intrigued by those who have to sleep with DND on.