If you have older kids in college now

[Anonymous]

When DC1 was at college, I got a few middle of the night calls and was glad I could help in a crisis or anxious situation. DC2 is a different kid, much more independent, and relies on friends for that kind of support. But I still keep the phone on at night, out of habit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do not keep my phone on DND.

+1

[Anonymous]

My kids are still on our Apple Find my Phone. As are DH and I. Technically, I could look and see their phone’s location at any time, and the kids are allowed to turn the feature off while at school, but I don’t think they do. The promise I made was to respect their privacy and only use the feature in emergencies while they are at school, so I don’t use it to stalk them. (At home, it’s helpful when they are heading home from a friends house or internship to know how far away their are and should we wait for dinner or whatever),

At any rate, since also 4 of us are on “Find My Phone,”they only have to click the “Find my Phone” button for my phone by one of my kids and I get a loud continuous ring, no matter what the setting. And can tell from texts who needs a parents and why.
Both kids have used the function.

My older kid lost his passport when traveling outside the US and needed paperwork (Ugghh).

Younger kid has had some bad luck/ incidents at school. There was a shooting and lockdown, and she used it to let us know she was safe (thank you God!). She had a stalker freshman year and ended up in a not great 2am situation needing immediate advice on whether to call the campus security on the guy (yes!) And recently needed some after the fact moral support after midnight because she had a friend tell her she had taken pills to OD,mDD called 911 and the kid hid from the police. It was a mess. Kid was found and taken to the hospital. DD was interviewed as a witness. And since I’m a lawyer, she wanted me to reassure her she wouldn’t get in trouble for talking to the police. And DD also felt like she needed moral support.

It’s not fun to wake up to, but thankful my kid trusts me enough to let me know when there are problems. And trusts me to provide moral support withOUT freaking out. And glad to give advice if asked and a virtual hugs and love and support if she needs that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can set it up for certain numbers to ring through DND.

I sleep with an EarPod in with white noise (dog and DH snore) and have received calls from college kids. Good news, drunken butt dials.

In a true emergency, your kid might not be calling from their own phone. If they were mugged and their phone was stolen, or in ca car accident and their phone fell over a cliff or into a lake, they could be calling from a friend's phone.

Apple has a feature where you can have double calls break through DND. They just have to call twice.

NP. Could you explain how to set this up? Thanks! (I have it on DND, just don't see the double call break through option.)

On their contact click edit, you’ll see option for ringtone and text tone. Mark that to Emergency Bypass On at the top

[Anonymous]

If your kid is taken to the ER with a medical emergency, your permission may be needed for a procedure that could make a difference in their ultimate health outcome. This happened in our family.

[Anonymous]

Mine is on DND with my kids (and elderly relatives) set to ring through. Also, I use the setting that allows a repeat call from the same number to ring through. As backup, we do have a landline phone.

DD did have a medical emergency late one night and ended up needing the ER. Even though I didn’t go, I was able offer support by phone.

[Anonymous]

One kid in in New England one studying abroad you bet my phone is on my nightstand and on. Only once has it rung at 2am, and it was an emergency and I was glad I was able to get the phone call and help/support the kid on the other end of the phone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was in college I needed to use a pay phone. It all worked out.

Reading comprehension fail. So hot to post a snarky response they didn’t even understand the original post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can set it up for certain numbers to ring through DND.

I sleep with an EarPod in with white noise (dog and DH snore) and have received calls from college kids. Good news, drunken butt dials.

In a true emergency, your kid might not be calling from their own phone. If they were mugged and their phone was stolen, or in ca car accident and their phone fell over a cliff or into a lake, they could be calling from a friend's phone.

Apple has a feature where you can have double calls break through DND. They just have to call twice.

NP. Could you explain how to set this up? Thanks! (I have it on DND, just don't see the double call break through option.)

On their contact click edit, you’ll see option for ringtone and text tone. Mark that to Emergency Bypass On at the top

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your kid is taken to the ER with a medical emergency, your permission may be needed for a procedure that could make a difference in their ultimate health outcome. This happened in our family.

Same. And no underlying conditions, very healthy kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thinking last night about my kid leaving as I got into bed, I wondered: Do you keep your phone on DND when your child is away at school? The idea of him not being able to reach me, freaks me out.

Yes but they sort out their own problems with their friends and let me know about it later. 🥴

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your kid is taken to the ER with a medical emergency, your permission may be needed for a procedure that could make a difference in their ultimate health outcome. This happened in our family.

Same. And no underlying conditions, very healthy kid.

100%%%%%

And college health clinics suck- so you have to steer them medically.

If my kid hadn’t taken an uber to the ER in the middle of the night his appendix would have burst.

[Anonymous]

Yep- my phone is on DND with ring throughs for my kids (one in college, one post-college and lives out of town) and my husband (travels for work) and my parents (old). Otherwise, you can wait until tomorrow. That said, my kids do not call unless there is an emergency. Happens very rarely but I'm glad they can reach me if they need me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have my kids and husband set to breakthrough do not disturb so if they need to reach me they can

And if your kids or husband's phone gets lost or stolen and they borrow a friend's phone, they won't be able to get through.

Correct. But their phone will still be missing in the morning, and we can talk them.

Time to cut the cord - literally!

I got a sports injury that sent me to the college ER when I was a freshman. I had turned eighteen about a month earlier, so I handled it with support from coaches. I called my parents with the story in the morning. Before cell phones, that was expected, and I think it is healthier than the expectation that you call mom for everything your whole life.

[Anonymous]

How many calls are some of you getting that you need to put your phone on DND overnight? The only time my phone rings overnight is in a true emergency.