Do younger teens really do nothing all summer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I had a summer job when I was 14 back in the olden days - and I see plenty of younger teens working at places like ice cream shops, stores, etc when we go to other parts of the country on vacation, so it's not just this area. You can work 4 hours a day at an easy summer job and still be a kid.

You will find that things have changed. It’s hard even for older teens to find summer jobs. They definitely don’t employ 14 yr olds anymore except as CITs and then often they have to pay themselves. Lifeguarding is the only job I know for 15 year olds around this area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I don’t want mine hanging out on video games and it’s a good time to explore their interests.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with video games. And most of you mean it’s a good time for your kids to explore YOUR interests.

Not in moderation. But 14 year olds don't do moderation.

Mine gets extremely bored with video games after an hour or two. Or maybe an hour or two of video games is extreme to you, but moderate to me?

Me too, and hour or two seems perfect to me. I was like that back in the day with Nintendo. I don't get kids who could be glued to it for 8 hours straight if allowed.

This is my kid. No diagnosis, but can hyperfocus. Luckily he sees it too and knows it's not good for him, so he works with us to keep it under control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I don’t want mine hanging out on video games and it’s a good time to explore their interests.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with video games. And most of you mean it’s a good time for your kids to explore YOUR interests.

Not in moderation. But 14 year olds don't do moderation.

Mine gets extremely bored with video games after an hour or two. Or maybe an hour or two of video games is extreme to you, but moderate to me?

Me too, and hour or two seems perfect to me. I was like that back in the day with Nintendo. I don't get kids who could be glued to it for 8 hours straight if allowed.

This is my kid. No diagnosis, but can hyperfocus. Luckily he sees it too and knows it's not good for him, so he works with us to keep it under control.

It’s how some kids socialize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I don’t want mine hanging out on video games and it’s a good time to explore their interests.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with video games. And most of you mean it’s a good time for your kids to explore YOUR interests.

Not in moderation. But 14 year olds don't do moderation.

Mine gets extremely bored with video games after an hour or two. Or maybe an hour or two of video games is extreme to you, but moderate to me?

Me too, and hour or two seems perfect to me. I was like that back in the day with Nintendo. I don't get kids who could be glued to it for 8 hours straight if allowed.

This is my kid. No diagnosis, but can hyperfocus. Luckily he sees it too and knows it's not good for him, so he works with us to keep it under control.

It’s how some kids socialize.

That's not necessarily bad, but I wouldn't want all of my kids socializing through a screen.

[Anonymous]

I wish mine did a little more too, but he's not the type of kid you can force into activities.

I consider my job to limit the screens or least insist on using the screens to learn something.

So far it's going pretty well. I also am spending a lot of time with my kid right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I don’t want mine hanging out on video games and it’s a good time to explore their interests.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with video games. And most of you mean it’s a good time for your kids to explore YOUR interests.

Not in moderation. But 14 year olds don't do moderation.

Mine gets extremely bored with video games after an hour or two. Or maybe an hour or two of video games is extreme to you, but moderate to me?

Me too, and hour or two seems perfect to me. I was like that back in the day with Nintendo. I don't get kids who could be glued to it for 8 hours straight if allowed.

This is my kid. No diagnosis, but can hyperfocus. Luckily he sees it too and knows it's not good for him, so he works with us to keep it under control.

It’s how some kids socialize.

Yes, that's why we allowed it in the beginning. I think he knows he doesn't feel good when he's sat in one location for 4+ hours.

[Anonymous]

My kid is 14 and basically doing nothing. He works really hard during the school year and has his whole life to work. We are letting him relax this summer. He does have to read almost daily and practice his instrument. Other than that he has free time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I don’t want mine hanging out on video games and it’s a good time to explore their interests.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with video games. And most of you mean it’s a good time for your kids to explore YOUR interests.

I have zero interest in the things my child chooses. I’d prefer they pick other stuff but I support their interests. You should try it. I would pick very different things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I had a summer job when I was 14 back in the olden days - and I see plenty of younger teens working at places like ice cream shops, stores, etc when we go to other parts of the country on vacation, so it's not just this area. You can work 4 hours a day at an easy summer job and still be a kid.

Written by someone who does not have a 14 year old looking for a job in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.[/quote

Maybe you live in the past. But in 2024 a young teen would be sucked into the addictive internet all day. They don't live in Mayberry where they can jump on their bikes and find an adventure. No one is saying they need to be busy, busy, busy. But to have a physically healthy teen with normal friendships, some structure is required and is a gift to young teens.

At that age, I watched Soap Operas and game shows all day. Some might say I still became a productive member of society.

[Anonymous]

My 13 year old kind of does ‘nothing’ but he’s actually really busy between swim team and volunteering with preteam, a casual league for another sport, and days spent at the pool with friends or otherwise out in the neighborhood. Plus some chores. Yes, there are video game and a lot of time he can decide what to do with most of his time. He does have a couple weeks of sleep away camp too.

Slightly older teen (15) has a 10hr/wk job and is taking an online course as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.

I don’t want mine hanging out on video games and it’s a good time to explore their interests.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with video games. And most of you mean it’s a good time for your kids to explore YOUR interests.

I have zero interest in the things my child chooses. I’d prefer they pick other stuff but I support their interests. You should try it. I would pick very different things.

Try what? I always let my kids lead, and then I try to become interested in what they pick, because I am interested in my kids.

Stating that you have zero interests in your kids’ interests is not something to be proud of, IMO.

[Anonymous]

Bad soap operas, game shows and Saved By the Bell reruns are SO much better than algorithmic, targeted apps like YouTube. We were also stuck with whatever was on TV (no streaming on demand) so we were much more likely to get bored and do something else.

It seems really foolish and naive to equate our childhood screentime to today.

[Anonymous]

Your kid is right. From the ages of 12-14 my kids did what you describe as nothing. We did not force CIT or volunteering. They had a few weeks of sports camps, which ranged from a week of sleep away to just 2 hours in the evening. Depending on the kid and age, their fall practices started early August. We always took a vacation in the summer and traveled to see both sets of grandparents at some point. Unlimited screen time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many of you are clearly so uncomfortable with the idea of just letting your kids be. Exist. They have to always be busy, busy, busy with some outside structured activity. Then you can pat yourselves on the back for being such great parents without ever actually having to parent.

The DMV is a sick area. 14 years olds don’t need jobs or volun(told) hours. Just let them be kids for awhile.[/quote

Maybe you live in the past. But in 2024 a young teen would be sucked into the addictive internet all day. They don't live in Mayberry where they can jump on their bikes and find an adventure. No one is saying they need to be busy, busy, busy. But to have a physically healthy teen with normal friendships, some structure is required and is a gift to young teens.

At that age, I watched Soap Operas and game shows all day. Some might say I still became a productive member of society.

Me too. I woke up at 11am and ate cereal while watching The Price is Right. Then I watched Days of our Lives at 1pm and spent the rest of the day tanning at the pool. I did my summer reading there. That’s it.