61% of single women in America are not looking to get into a new relationship compared to 38% of men

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Feminism.

It will be very interesting to see the younger generations of women age single, and alone, with no families of their own. Will they have enough saved for retirement? How will they make it? I have an older female relative -- single, childless, early 70s -- living in another relative's garage because they lost their job. Can't find another one that covers the bills, now health is failing. Without the help of nieces and nephews, she might be on the streets.

This sounds like it has nothing to do with "faminism" and being the single, cool aunt. And everything to do with not being financially stable at 70. What 70 is looking to work to cover bills? I don't know a single one who HAS to do it (though I'm sure there are those ppl out there).

I know plenty of people who will have to work until 70 to pay bills, but most of them are married or were married at one time.

Being married and having kids doesn't guarantee being able to retire any more than staying single does. In fact, if one of my friends has stayed single instead of getting married twice, she wouldn't be broke right now. The second dh used her for her perceived money and then dumped her when her savings ran out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Nannie’s are often better.

Women can have and raise babies without men, you make it sound like it’s impossible.

Of course it's possible. Never heard of a single mom before? But it's not desirable, at all. And no, a nanny is not a parent replacement. You must have a nanny if you think that to make yourself feel better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Oh honey.

A ton of women with three kids (two babies and one husband) envy the independence and the freedom a wealthy single mother has. Go read more in this forum about how many people are staying because they can’t bear the thought of giving their kids up half the time.

The person no one envies is the woman married to a low-tier man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But it’s such a good deal for older single women! You get an older single man and all of his neglected physical and mental health issues to deal with. And probably his grown kids and grandkids as well who will never accept you. So much more appealing than a quiet single life with your career and your own friends and family!!!!! Can’t believe women age 50+ aren’t signing up for this honestly.

lol nailed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Yeah, you can. Into your 90s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Oh honey.

A ton of women with three kids (two babies and one husband) envy the independence and the freedom a wealthy single mother has. Go read more in this forum about how many people are staying because they can’t bear the thought of giving their kids up half the time.

The person no one envies is the woman married to a low-tier man.

Uh, no. Speak for yourself. I'd rather just be single and fabulous than be the sole, constant on duty, single plane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Oh honey.

A ton of women with three kids (two babies and one husband) envy the independence and the freedom a wealthy single mother has. Go read more in this forum about how many people are staying because they can’t bear the thought of giving their kids up half the time.

The person no one envies is the woman married to a low-tier man.

Uh, no. Speak for yourself. I'd rather just be single and fabulous than be the sole, constant on duty, single plane.

^ single parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Yeah, you can. Into your 90s.

Agree. You don't need kids to have a life well lived. What is this nonsense people are spewing about just doing it all alone in your 40s as if that is what you have to do if you can't find someone to marry. There is more than one way to live.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Oh honey.

A ton of women with three kids (two babies and one husband) envy the independence and the freedom a wealthy single mother has. Go read more in this forum about how many people are staying because they can’t bear the thought of giving their kids up half the time.

The person no one envies is the woman married to a low-tier man.

Uh, no. Speak for yourself. I'd rather just be single and fabulous than be the sole, constant on duty, single plane.

And that’s fine— but the poster was bemoaning how women have “no families” as though women are constrained to having a child with a partner— they’re not and they’re frequently better off without one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But it’s such a good deal for older single women! You get an older single man and all of his neglected physical and mental health issues to deal with. And probably his grown kids and grandkids as well who will never accept you. So much more appealing than a quiet single life with your career and your own friends and family!!!!! Can’t believe women age 50+ aren’t signing up for this honestly.

lol nailed it.

My widower uncle started dating after my aunt passed and his girlfriend promptly dumped him when he needed surgery and would be off his feet for awhile. She was having none of that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Oh honey.

A ton of women with three kids (two babies and one husband) envy the independence and the freedom a wealthy single mother has. Go read more in this forum about how many people are staying because they can’t bear the thought of giving their kids up half the time.

The person no one envies is the woman married to a low-tier man.

Uh, no. Speak for yourself. I'd rather just be single and fabulous than be the sole, constant on duty, single plane.

And that’s fine— but the poster was bemoaning how women have “no families” as though women are constrained to having a child with a partner— they’re not and they’re frequently better off without one.

I wasn't that PP but I don't see the 40something woman deciding to just become SMBC as the answer to not being the 'cool aunt' anymore. There are lots of unenviable people out there. Those with the dud husband, this with the dud ex who rarely sees his kids, the SMBC trying to do it all alone..... none of these are ideal or enviable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Oh honey.

A ton of women with three kids (two babies and one husband) envy the independence and the freedom a wealthy single mother has. Go read more in this forum about how many people are staying because they can’t bear the thought of giving their kids up half the time.

The person no one envies is the woman married to a low-tier man.

Uh, no. Speak for yourself. I'd rather just be single and fabulous than be the sole, constant on duty, single plane.

And that’s fine— but the poster was bemoaning how women have “no families” as though women are constrained to having a child with a partner— they’re not and they’re frequently better off without one.

I wasn't that PP but I don't see the 40something woman deciding to just become SMBC as the answer to not being the 'cool aunt' anymore. There are lots of unenviable people out there. Those with the dud husband, this with the dud ex who rarely sees his kids, the SMBC trying to do it all alone..... none of these are ideal or enviable.

In your list only the SMBC has freedom. So she’s more enviable than the rest by a mile.

[Anonymous]

My experience is women frequently need wealthy men, that is a major reason many get married.

Anonymous wrote:Marriage makes sense for women who want to have families, and can have financial benefits if they live in an expensive area where buying a home or raising kids on a single salary might be challenging even if reasonably well paid.

Outside of that, marriage is often not a good deal for women, and a way for them to get tied down to someone who is unlikely to care for them as much as they expect to be cared for BY them, especially as you age.

So for women who doesn't want to or cannot have kids, and is financially stable, the ONLY situation in which a longterm relationship or marriage makes sense is if she meets someone who truly makes her happy and would be a good partner and bring something to the table. But by your late 30s and onward, the number of unmarried men who fit that description is very, very small. The ones who are out there might also have baggage you don't want to deal with (divorced or widowed, potentially children from a previous marriage, demanding jobs that are not conducive to compromise or relationships).

What is the value proposition for them? There really isn't one.

Meanwhile a lot of men in this age group want or even need women to do the stuff women do in relationships all the time -- make the home a nice place to be, maintain social relationships, plan vacations, encourage their partners to go to the doctor and dentist, etc. Women don't need someone to do that stuff. Many men do. It's honestly sad.

We need a new vision for being a man that brings more to the table than sperm and a job. Men need more soft skills that would actually benefit other people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Nannie’s are often better.

Women can have and raise babies without men, you make it sound like it’s impossible.

Of course it's possible. Never heard of a single mom before? But it's not desirable, at all. And no, a nanny is not a parent replacement. You must have a nanny if you think that to make yourself feel better.

It’s is desirable when it’s planned that way.

Not a replacement but better at providing support and not being a burden.

Most men are less helpful than a nanny/sister/grandmother.

Sadly, men are mostly missing or worse pouting about not getting more attention.

Remove him from the picture and life is much easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look ladies, it’s all fun and games to be the “cool aunt” when you are 28 and traveling the world. Everyone looks up to you and they want to be you. Then you turn 43 and you’re still single with no kids and your career has sort of peaked, as well as your looks.

You can’t be a “cool aunt” at 43

Right, that’s the age when the cool aunts become the cool SMBC whose nieces and nephews free babysit and who is in a place in her career to have a full time
Nanny.

It's not really a step up to be a SMBC. Nobody is envious of that person, doing it all alone, with a fatherless child. A nanny is not a replacement for a second parent.

Nannie’s are often better.

Women can have and raise babies without men, you make it sound like it’s impossible.

Of course it's possible. Never heard of a single mom before? But it's not desirable, at all. And no, a nanny is not a parent replacement. You must have a nanny if you think that to make yourself feel better.

It’s is desirable when it’s planned that way.

Not a replacement but better at providing support and not being a burden.

Most men are less helpful than a nanny/sister/grandmother.

Sadly, men are mostly missing or worse pouting about not getting more attention.

Remove him from the picture and life is much easier.

Yeah can't imagine why anyone would divorce your miserable ass