What is emotional affair?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"do you hide this relationship from your spouse? If your spouse saw your interactions, would he/she be okay with it? If not, it’s an EA."

This. If you can't be completely open about it with your partner, or would change the way you interact with the other party if your partner were watching, it's an EA.

If it's already long hugs and touch, you're moving into actual physical affair territory. If you couldn't do it in front of your partner, or tell your partner the unedited truth about all of it, it's cheating.

Not sure that’s a good test of EA for spouses who aren’t the jealous type and would think nothing of it.

DH thought nothing of my EA but it was pretty serious to me.

So you wanted him to be upset?

I didn’t want him to take it too hard but it was very much a nothing burger to him to the point where I questioned myself over whether it was a big nothing burger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"do you hide this relationship from your spouse? If your spouse saw your interactions, would he/she be okay with it? If not, it’s an EA."

This. If you can't be completely open about it with your partner, or would change the way you interact with the other party if your partner were watching, it's an EA.

If it's already long hugs and touch, you're moving into actual physical affair territory. If you couldn't do it in front of your partner, or tell your partner the unedited truth about all of it, it's cheating.

Not sure that’s a good test of EA for spouses who aren’t the jealous type and would think nothing of it.

DH thought nothing of my EA but it was pretty serious to me.

So you wanted him to be upset?

I didn’t want him to take it too hard but it was very much a nothing burger to him to the point where I questioned myself over whether it was a big nothing burger.

I too wanted my DH to care, maybe to get jealous. Nope, nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get affection I don't have in my marriage, so my friendship is an emotional affair of sorts. DH is a good guy, and I love him, but he is not warm or caring. With DH, even when we go on dates, he rarely focuses on what I want. In fact, I done think it occurs to him to consider. He leads and has fun; I follow. With my friend, much of it is about me: he remembers my preferences, he's interested in my work, he asked about my hobbies. From what I understand (we rarely discuss our spouses, if at all), he does not get much attention from his wife, and it matters for him that I ask about his FOO, friends, etc. Nothing physical happens, although we once held hands in a movie

If you held hands, it is physical. I would not go out of town with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is no such thing as having a "good friend" of the opposite sex. If you're in a relationship of any sort, that person should be your best friend. If they are not then you're not 100% into the relationship.

Any no, men cannot be friends with women they don't want to bang. That's just fact. There might be a .0000001% chance but it's a one off. Always assume if a guy and girl are friends, the guy wants the girl.

I’m no adultery proponent but this is paranoia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get affection I don't have in my marriage, so my friendship is an emotional affair of sorts. DH is a good guy, and I love him, but he is not warm or caring. With DH, even when we go on dates, he rarely focuses on what I want. In fact, I done think it occurs to him to consider. He leads and has fun; I follow. With my friend, much of it is about me: he remembers my preferences, he's interested in my work, he asked about my hobbies. From what I understand (we rarely discuss our spouses, if at all), he does not get much attention from his wife, and it matters for him that I ask about his FOO, friends, etc. Nothing physical happens, although we once held hands in a movie

If you held hands, it is physical. I would not go out of town with him.

It happened some years ago, we had plenty of opportunities to sleep together but never did. We been friends for more than 15 years. There were times when EA was more evident and intense and times when we barely spoke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no such thing as having a "good friend" of the opposite sex. If you're in a relationship of any sort, that person should be your best friend. If they are not then you're not 100% into the relationship.

Any no, men cannot be friends with women they don't want to bang. That's just fact. There might be a .0000001% chance but it's a one off. Always assume if a guy and girl are friends, the guy wants the girl.

This is 2024, and your ideas are outdated. I'm in my mid-50s, happily married nearly 30 years to an awesome man, and still have very close, great friendships with several males - 2 since HS. All are also happily married (we went to their weddings and vice versa), and none of us has any interest in a physical relationship with anyone but the spouse we are married to.

Get over your old-fashioned self

That's because you're not physically attracted to each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no such thing as having a "good friend" of the opposite sex. If you're in a relationship of any sort, that person should be your best friend. If they are not then you're not 100% into the relationship.

Any no, men cannot be friends with women they don't want to bang. That's just fact. There might be a .0000001% chance but it's a one off. Always assume if a guy and girl are friends, the guy wants the girl.

This is 2024, and your ideas are outdated. I'm in my mid-50s, happily married nearly 30 years to an awesome man, and still have very close, great friendships with several males - 2 since HS. All are also happily married (we went to their weddings and vice versa), and none of us has any interest in a physical relationship with anyone but the spouse we are married to.

Get over your old-fashioned self

That's because you're not physically attracted to each other.

DP- not PP, but not necessarily. It’s because I respect and value fidelity in marriage more than following an impulse. I don’t romanticize the road I didn’t take, either.

[Anonymous]

I think it is an emotional affair if that person knows more about you and your true thoughts than your spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it is an emotional affair if that person knows more about you and your true thoughts than your spouse.

My friends know me better than my spouse. There are def things I share with them that so don’t with my spouse.

I think an EA is the same stage/feelings as when you first start dating someone before you have sex, except you stay in that stage.

[Anonymous]

EA means you think about them way too often. When you think of time spent together or see/hear their name it makes you smile. You keep bringing up their name in conversation without thinking about it and always want to be around them. You can't wait to be around each other.

[Anonymous]

Emotional affair is the lame excuse that people(women mostly) use to justify their cheating. Women hide behind EA a lot..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Emotional affair is the lame excuse that people(women mostly) use to justify their cheating. Women hide behind EA a lot..

lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's when a wife finds out her husband has been trying to close the deal with his secretary--just never made it across the finish line.

A failed conquest.

Exactly… in the 1950s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Emotional affair is the lame excuse that people(women mostly) use to justify their cheating. Women hide behind EA a lot..

Haha so true. When I found out my ex wife was cheating and pulled some BS like that and she was crying so much. Nothing ever justify an affair. People who have affairs are morally corrupt men or women period

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no such thing as having a "good friend" of the opposite sex. If you're in a relationship of any sort, that person should be your best friend. If they are not then you're not 100% into the relationship.

Any no, men cannot be friends with women they don't want to bang. That's just fact. There might be a .0000001% chance but it's a one off. Always assume if a guy and girl are friends, the guy wants the girl.

I’m no adultery proponent but this is paranoia.

+1