Would a private school suspend or expel a boy for this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give me a break. No expulsion. 10 or 11 is when it happened with my kids (now in 20s). Stuff like this happens. They aren't ruined for life, they all just need to have a talk with a trusted adult about what sex/love is, and what it is not. About how pornography is exploitive. About how the reason its meant for adults is because they are mature enough to process what they are seeing (sometimes). And it is NOT meant for children because we don't want them to get a mixed up sense of what love and sex is.

And, every one of the kids exposed to this, WATCHING IT, knew it was the wrong thing to do and any one of them could have said something sooner - like when it first happened. So they aren't all so innocent either.

I remember hearing my 12 year old tell the kid next to him on a bus (field trip, I was sitting behind him) that he didn't think what they were looking at was appropriate and they should watch something else, so it can and does happen

I agree. They are pretty much all looking at this stuff; it's 2023 and there is easy access on the internet. It's unfortunate, but it is the case.

[Anonymous]

Expel no questions. The fact that he shared with others is what dictates the expulsion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All this pearl clutching is ridiculous. I have three teenagers and I remember I went to a middle school sex talk where they told us that whatever you think your kids have done or seen - that was two years ago. Meaning even if you have the best parental controls in the world on your devices, the minute your kid leaves home they are exposed to open laptops, phones and computers at other people's houses.

While I agree it's not ideal for kids to see porn at 9 or 10 years old, this is the reality of the world we live in. Porn is degrading and can create unrealistic and violent ideas about sex. The solution is to TALK TO YOUR KIDS- and way earlier than you think you need to. (I also feel like this puritanical hatred of sex is strange while no one worries about taking 5th graders to R movies where people's heads get shot off not to mention video games... ahem. But that is a discussion for another day.)

My kids recently told me by age 12 they had seen it all. That is with controls on their phones and on all our devices. Kids are curious about sex. The kid that showed porn to friends is not an axe murderer. I disagree about expulsion as the proper response in this situation, and know of several similar instances at our big three school where the kid was most definitely not expelled. Again- education, frank discussion, and staying calm is probably the best ways to keep your kids with a healthy view of sex. Because you can't put the genie back in the bottle.

+1
Do everything you can (delay phone, lock down devices, content restrictions, etc) but don’t have your head in the sand. What op described is going on everywhere, on a regular basis. I’m surprised so many people are shocked by this. There’s no getting around it if you put your kids around other kids.

[Anonymous]

Yes, would be expelled. More as a judgement on the parents than the kid; there is no way he should have been sharing that at a private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All this pearl clutching is ridiculous. I have three teenagers and I remember I went to a middle school sex talk where they told us that whatever you think your kids have done or seen - that was two years ago. Meaning even if you have the best parental controls in the world on your devices, the minute your kid leaves home they are exposed to open laptops, phones and computers at other people's houses.

While I agree it's not ideal for kids to see porn at 9 or 10 years old, this is the reality of the world we live in. Porn is degrading and can create unrealistic and violent ideas about sex. The solution is to TALK TO YOUR KIDS- and way earlier than you think you need to. (I also feel like this puritanical hatred of sex is strange while no one worries about taking 5th graders to R movies where people's heads get shot off not to mention video games... ahem. But that is a discussion for another day.)

My kids recently told me by age 12 they had seen it all. That is with controls on their phones and on all our devices. Kids are curious about sex. The kid that showed porn to friends is not an axe murderer. I disagree about expulsion as the proper response in this situation, and know of several similar instances at our big three school where the kid was most definitely not expelled. Again- education, frank discussion, and staying calm is probably the best ways to keep your kids with a healthy view of sex. Because you can't put the genie back in the bottle.

Thanks for chiming in, public school parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is happening every day in schools all over the country.

It certainly happens at nearly every public school. But you don’t pay $10k to $50k yr for it to happen in private or for administration to look the other way if it does.