Why don't you start coaching in the rec league, and coach your son's team? This is what I did. This will give you some control over your son's soccer development, and you can also help his teammates. If you can keep the same team together for a few consecutive seasons, you can make a great deal of progress. |
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OP, I just had this discussion with my child, but she is in rec and is interested in travel. I think she has the talent for it. She also has a great time at practice and games but does not pick up a ball or do anything soccer related on her own.
What I told her is that I would support her in any way possible. But. If we do travel, I do expect her to spend some time on her own improving her dribbling and foot skills. She’s thinking about that. I feel ok with that conversation. I’m not spending thousands to have her just do the bare minimum. If she’s excited enough about it, then she would be willing to put a bit of effort into it. If not, that’s fine. I’m not pressuring her to do it and it’s perfectly fine to be active and play on a rec team and have fun. |
| It's unbelievable how much stress parents put on kids who are young. At age 8 they should be having fun. When they are at practices work hard and play hard at games. You have to develop a love and a knack for something which comes with time. My kid was exactly like OP at age 8 and now age 12 is a star striker on the 2nd team on a large well respected club. I mean honestly, he just wanted ti get better because he wanted to win. Did not start till about age 10. And even if he hadn't and wanted to stay in travel we would have spent the money. Rec is never going to be a serious consideration for a kid who wants to be good. Practice or no practice, travel is structured approach and working with an actual accredited soccer coach. Watching a rec game after you've watched competitive games is hard. Why wouldn't you let your kid just enjoy having fun in 3rd grade? And just because he practices does not mean he will become a star you know that right? Fun is the number one motivator to success. The work will come if he wants to be good at a sport he eNjoys. What kid just works for no reason? Just because you put him in travel is not his obligation to work. It's an opportunity. At age 8 it's wonderful. Give him his opportunity to play happily. |
Oh the rosters change quite a bit. Kids move from one club to another and to and from DCU, and in and out of the area. But if you had picked the top 20 kids in the DMV at U13, and you picked them again at U19 - at least fifteen of the original twenty would still be on the list as long as you account for the ones that left the region. Lower down - within an individual ECNL/MLS Next roster for example - it may seem like there's more change - and in terms of position on the totem pole there probably is, but that's the nature of the bell curve for you. A small percentage improvement moves you a great many more spots up or down once you get out of the tail of the distribution. Still the kids abilities don't tend to change all that much. A kid who was in the eighty-fifth percentile might end up in the ninetieth, and thus make a first team somewhere. But he's exceedingly unlikely to end up in the ninety-eighth or ninety-ninth. At least in my experience. |
Thanks for this! Good perspective. It’s just a lot of $$$ and time commitment and breaks up the family time on weekends |
| Once you get off the travel soccer wheel is it impossible to get back on? |
| OP here- I should add, he's not the most coordinated or strong and is not at an amazing club. Even top level teams consistently lose (by a lot) to other better clubs in the area. |
| We have had wonderful rec level coaches (I’ve also done it for many seasons), but from my observations new to travel, it’s such a higher level of training and competition. My son is turning 11 and we are just making the leap. My son does practice on his own and with neighborhood kids. We also try to sign him up for extras things like academy classes and such at the indoor facility. |
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From U9 to U12 (just 3 short years) a lot changes with teams and development! A lot of kids who are on the A team by U12 have been playing since U9 as the roster grows from 9kids to 13+ kids. In between where you are now to U12, you kids will improve by leaps and bounds just participating in travel practice and games. By U13 some of the top players leave for more competitive clubs, making more room for average players who stuck with it!
Just keep it fun and light and hopefully the A team coach will encourage and challenge your to practice more at home! |
| Players develop over time, and it is not a steady improvement. They'll level off and then improve again as months pass. On the U11 top boys team at our club, there are two kids who started in the third team who are now on the top one. There was one who decided to quit soccer to play football. There is a player from the rec side of our club who is seems good and has come out twice to train with the team to see if he likes it. Point being, there are so many variables and you probably need to take your son to some travel practices to see how you all feel about it and then decide. For us, the memories we have made (parents and kids) have been worth every minute and every dollar but of course not everyone feels that way. |
+1 Geez, wait till puberty. It almost not fair for late bloomers..... then they catch up. He's 8! You sound nuts! |
Then take him to camps. or have private lessons.
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This. It's too early to give up! Also, things change even more from U12 to U18. Puberty does create a whole new level of separation. Can you assemble a group of kids to do extra skills training together? At that age, my kid was not motivated to practice alone or with me but was always happy to do small group training with buddies. Also, it is not too early to add speed and conditioning work, especially if you can make it social.
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We got off the travel train this year at U13. My DSs (twins) enjoyed the practices and games, but didn’t like the stress and the intensity. Whatever skills they learned didn’t stick in between seasons. They would spend the winter and spring playing with the club team, get really good at playing possession and making quick decisions, but then lose ground in the fall with the town travel team, where the pace of play is much slower and the coaches favor a kickball style that rewards size and aggression.
They played with two different clubs starting at U8. IME, clubs don’t spend a lot of time working on dribbling, shooting, and basic footskills. It’s expected that kids work on their own to develop those. Practices focused more on rondos, passing lanes, attacking 2v2 and 3v3, and small-sided games. Kids will pick up footskills during those drills, but they advance more quickly if they work on their own. During that time, DS #1 would frequently go out in the backyard and work to develop foot skills and first touch. DS #2 never once touched a ball outside of practice, but because he’s a speed demon and has a high soccer IQ, he got more playing time and better positions. That frustrated DS #1 no end, who felt like all his effort was for nothing. They weren’t loving the club atmosphere, so this year we switched to a winter futsal league. It was more relaxed and they had a lot more fun. It’s all about their goals (enjoyment and socialization? skill mastery? make a high school team? get a college offer?) and pursuing the things that light them up. DS #1 stopped practicing soccer and started spending all his free time on coding and music (I can barely pry him away from the piano at dinner and bedtime), so that was a clear signal to me about where his heart currently is. DS #2 has discovered that he loves running and considers cross country his #1 sport now. If they get passionate about soccer again, we’ll give club another try, but I think town travel and school teams will be enough for them. You really don’t know until you give it a try for a few years. As other posters have said, things change rapidly from U8-U12. |
DD has been off it for two years now. Friends still on the team and the coach have asked her to come back, but she's done and we're not sad to give up driving 2 hours each way for an hour and a half of play. |