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you might want to read this
https://reformedsportsproject.com/blog/f/the-car-ride-home |
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Parents who expect their kid at early ages to know exactly what they want are nuts. Very few people will ever have that strong sense of clarity no matter what age. You need to calm the F down. Travel with the right program offers a more robust learning program than playing rec. My DD recognizes that from age 6 when she said - well rec is great with friends but if I'm going to get better I need to work with actual coaches so at age 6 she had 3x practices a week! I had zero expectations except to let her lead the way. This did not mean she had psycho drive to be the best player nor does she say now at age 12 she wants to be a pro. But I can tell that 6 years of travel soccer has made her understand what a commitment is - the practices, the games, the good and bad moments all - the money us worth it for these lessons outside of soccer. She has enjoyed playing on a team and socially enjoyed making friends and with new teams, learn to work with new kids she doesn't know.
The plus side is she's got a lot of talent and I'm seeing her progress with every year. I have zero expectations as a parent other than that travel soccer has benefitted her as a person. That for me is enough. |
| This sounds like you have allowed the environment of the club and parent groupthink to get to you. It happened to me too because we were at a big-name club where the coaches actually give you less feedback and expect you to run your kid into the dirt for their benefit. I now regret it. Just know that the tiers don't mean s** at that age. Let the kid have fun and develop at his pace- try to ignore the noise. |
U12/U13??? For boys it’s U16/17. There are 5’2-5’4” Freshmen that will be 6 feet by Senior year. A lot of the big guns stopped developing during middle school. For my Senior- the top Mlsnext, Ecnl teams look very very different than u9-u15. Things change A LOT. |
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+1
It's also not just about height. Plenty of 5'7'' kids get recruited by top colleges but some of those kids we know were also late to puberty so at U12/U13 they looked less talented than the big early to puberty kids who could out run them. But once they built up their muscles things changed a lot. I'd guess the top player on DC's varsity team is 5'6'' or 5'7'' but really fast and strong. |
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OP the only thing you should be concerned about right now is whether your son enjoys going to practice and playing games with his team. If he’s happy and not complaining you just keep doing what you’re doing. If he complains about practice then have a conversation with him about whether it makes sense to continue beyond this year. I assume you’re committed financially for this year that’s why I say next year. Don’t worry about whether he’s practicing on his own or not.
My son is U10 on the B team at a big club. This time last year he wasn’t practicing on its own at all. But he loved going to practice and games. Toward the end of spring he started wanting to kick the ball around on his own almost every day. He is doing it now as I type. We don’t tell him to, he just goes out on his own because he feels like it. If he stops doing that I won’t care. Things change quickly with kids and that goes all ways. |
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Keep at it. Our 9 year old quit travel this year. Top club top team. They didn't want to commit the time to a top team because they play other sports. It was just too intense. But if the kid likes it, I wouldn't change unless you can't afford the time/money/commitment.
My other kid didn't do much until U12. Now doing really well practicing outside practice and developing. You never know where an 8 year old will end up. Some of these clubs focus soooo much on just that one sport at such a young age. It is rare 8 year old that can Plat soccer or hockey or swim all year. Burns them out. |
Oh definitely more competitive- and practices (which really are what you are paying for) more complex. |
Thanks! Can you break them down for me? I don’t know the diff between NCSL, ENCL,EDP and national league |
Yeah, I figured at least 14. |
I kind of disagree with this. My DS is U10 and since he was 7 he will pick up the ball and juggle all day throughout the house. My youngest DS is only 4 and obsessed with soccer and basketball. He practices shots for both shots alone by himself in the basement for up to an hour at a time. Their individual passions for the sport are clear. OP- does your DS have the opportunity to or choose to play soccer during recess? If not, then that's definitely a red flag and I'd explore other sports. Rec at this age is fine until you determine what he's most interested in and then invest there. |
This is not what "travel" means for U9/U10. If you're based Maryland it means you can travel as far as Hagerstown, MD or Manassas, VA. Forcible stay at a hotel at this age group is very rare. I've only heard about it once from another club and we're in the top bracket for EDP. That being said, we have faced teams from PA and CT in local tournaments at the U9 level, so there are clubs like this. But the majority are not. |
+1 if your club has 4 teams in an age group and your DC is in the bottom group, I don't think the cost is worth it. |
Yes. You are. My son is 11 on great travel team that plays top flight. He hates practicing alone in the backyard and only does it a couple times a year for 15 minutes max. Leave him alone. |
8 year old travel games are mostly within 30 minutes. Unless they are an outstanding team and are doing a national tournament which is optional. Classic case of talking about what you don't know. |