Preschool vs Daycare Wars

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So there is a big difference, op, and I’m not sure why you would want to keep misnaming it. Pre school isn’t really set up covering childcare during working hours at all. Pre school (half days) generally starts out at 2 days a week for 2 year olds, 3 days a week for 3 yo, etc and is focused on early socialization and skills. If you use pre school you still need child care for most of the day. It generally requires potty trained kids and doesn’t stat before 3. It’s more like supplemental places like my gym, music classes, mothers morning out, or coop pre schools.

Daycare is group childcare that is obviously structured around dual working parent hours. I have done both. There’s some evidence that the less hours/younger age for group care is healthier for kids in the long but obviously is a big financial sacrifice for any family to sah or get a nanny for the bulk of care through those years and what’s best for each family is different. But I think it’s confusing to say you are using pre school when you are doing daycare, because it does imply you are either not working or have a nanny/family caring for your child most of the time. So yes I would clarify that with you if we met on the playground and started talking about childcare.

On the other hand, older friends and relatives often ask if my kid is in preschool, and if I have to say "no, daycare," I have to explain the whole thing. They don't know or care about the difference.

I think it mostly is a dated distinction. I think there was a time when daycare was really just a room full of toys and some adults to supervise. In today's world daycare can offer lots of great learning. I don't care which hours it covers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So there is a big difference, op, and I’m not sure why you would want to keep misnaming it. Pre school isn’t really set up covering childcare during working hours at all. Pre school (half days) generally starts out at 2 days a week for 2 year olds, 3 days a week for 3 yo, etc and is focused on early socialization and skills. If you use pre school you still need child care for most of the day. It generally requires potty trained kids and doesn’t stat before 3. It’s more like supplemental places like my gym, music classes, mothers morning out, or coop pre schools.

Daycare is group childcare that is obviously structured around dual working parent hours. I have done both. There’s some evidence that the less hours/younger age for group care is healthier for kids in the long but obviously is a big financial sacrifice for any family to sah or get a nanny for the bulk of care through those years and what’s best for each family is different. But I think it’s confusing to say you are using pre school when you are doing daycare, because it does imply you are either not working or have a nanny/family caring for your child most of the time. So yes I would clarify that with you if we met on the playground and started talking about childcare.

On the other hand, older friends and relatives often ask if my kid is in preschool, and if I have to say "no, daycare," I have to explain the whole thing. They don't know or care about the difference.

I think it mostly is a dated distinction. I think there was a time when daycare was really just a room full of toys and some adults to supervise. In today's world daycare can offer lots of great learning. I don't care which hours it covers.

Yes, there is definitely an outdated perception that daycare = babysitting and preschool = learning. But most daycares that I know these days have a curriculum and center time and music time and outdoor play. Even some of the home daycares have multiple "teachers" and a structured day, more like a preschool setting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I only find it weird when people use the term “preschool” for a kid under 3 who is clearly going to daycare. I always get the vibe that they’re self conscious that their kid is going to daycare so they rebrand it as “school.” I say this as someone with a kid in daycare—it’s not school and it’s not supposed to be.

this!

Did you think you were adding to the conversation with this post?

[Anonymous]

What an absolutely insane thing to care about. My kids went to both day care and preschool. We never did a preschool program within a daycare but if someone told me they were good and a preschool program I would believe them because I’m not insane? I was lucky enough to be able to keep my days short even when I had access to longer days at daycare and kept the same hours when they went to a full day preschool. I have never heard anyone say preschool has to be a half day. The programs I know of like that are typically called “nursery school “ in. The official name. But if someone called it preschool I’m sure I could figure out what they meant!

Why do so many people need to find ways to diminish other people’s choices. There is no real hierarchy in any way. I was happier with our daycare than the first preschool I sent my kids to (which I see recommended on her alll the time- but the teachers while qualified yell a lot). I was probably happiest with the preschool my youngest went to. Who cares what they are called- I needed childcare and wanted my kids to be happy and learning while they were away from me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What an absolutely insane thing to care about. My kids went to both day care and preschool. We never did a preschool program within a daycare but if someone told me they were good and a preschool program I would believe them because I’m not insane? I was lucky enough to be able to keep my days short even when I had access to longer days at daycare and kept the same hours when they went to a full day preschool. I have never heard anyone say preschool has to be a half day. The programs I know of like that are typically called “nursery school “ in. The official name. But if someone called it preschool I’m sure I could figure out what they meant!

Why do so many people need to find ways to diminish other people’s choices. There is no real hierarchy in any way. I was happier with our daycare than the first preschool I sent my kids to (which I see recommended on her alll the time- but the teachers while qualified yell a lot). I was probably happiest with the preschool my youngest went to. Who cares what they are called- I needed childcare and wanted my kids to be happy and learning while they were away from me.

Insecurity paired with an excess of spare time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What an absolutely insane thing to care about. My kids went to both day care and preschool. We never did a preschool program within a daycare but if someone told me they were good and a preschool program I would believe them because I’m not insane? I was lucky enough to be able to keep my days short even when I had access to longer days at daycare and kept the same hours when they went to a full day preschool. I have never heard anyone say preschool has to be a half day. The programs I know of like that are typically called “nursery school “ in. The official name. But if someone called it preschool I’m sure I could figure out what they meant!

Why do so many people need to find ways to diminish other people’s choices. There is no real hierarchy in any way. I was happier with our daycare than the first preschool I sent my kids to (which I see recommended on her alll the time- but the teachers while qualified yell a lot). I was probably happiest with the preschool my youngest went to. Who cares what they are called- I needed childcare and wanted my kids to be happy and learning while they were away from me.

Insecurity paired with an excess of spare time.

This is spot on. Isn’t it telling that whoever started this thread referred to it as a “war”, and is trying to put down daycare facilities and those that use them? And when they are pushed to answer why they care, they don’t answer? It’s someone with an agenda trying to justify their choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So there is a big difference, op, and I’m not sure why you would want to keep misnaming it. Pre school isn’t really set up covering childcare during working hours at all. Pre school (half days) generally starts out at 2 days a week for 2 year olds, 3 days a week for 3 yo, etc and is focused on early socialization and skills. If you use pre school you still need child care for most of the day. It generally requires potty trained kids and doesn’t stat before 3. It’s more like supplemental places like my gym, music classes, mothers morning out, or coop pre schools.

Daycare is group childcare that is obviously structured around dual working parent hours. I have done both. There’s some evidence that the less hours/younger age for group care is healthier for kids in the long but obviously is a big financial sacrifice for any family to sah or get a nanny for the bulk of care through those years and what’s best for each family is different. But I think it’s confusing to say you are using pre school when you are doing daycare, because it does imply you are either not working or have a nanny/family caring for your child most of the time. So yes I would clarify that with you if we met on the playground and started talking about childcare.

Many (most?) well-regarded daycare centers have accredited preschool programs once kids get to age three. Ours did, as did most of the others I know (we don't live in DC). There isn't much difference between what my kids did during those days and what kids in free-standing preschools do.

When people asked where my kids went to preschool during those years, I would say they're in a preschool program at their daycare center, because that was the truth. If you need to insist that their NAEYC-accredited program is actually "daycare," then thank you, because now I know you're not my people.

The lines between the two have most definitely blurred over the last 10 years or so. There are many more daycares that have NAEYC approved preschool programs. There are also now many "play-based preschools" which is basically just daycare for older kids. But the distinction between the two has eroded significantly. So, think it's more appropriate to say that schools which are primarily childcare are daycares, but schools that have preschool curriculums and programs are pre-schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What an absolutely insane thing to care about. My kids went to both day care and preschool. We never did a preschool program within a daycare but if someone told me they were good and a preschool program I would believe them because I’m not insane? I was lucky enough to be able to keep my days short even when I had access to longer days at daycare and kept the same hours when they went to a full day preschool. I have never heard anyone say preschool has to be a half day. The programs I know of like that are typically called “nursery school “ in. The official name. But if someone called it preschool I’m sure I could figure out what they meant!

Why do so many people need to find ways to diminish other people’s choices. There is no real hierarchy in any way. I was happier with our daycare than the first preschool I sent my kids to (which I see recommended on her alll the time- but the teachers while qualified yell a lot). I was probably happiest with the preschool my youngest went to. Who cares what they are called- I needed childcare and wanted my kids to be happy and learning while they were away from me.

Insecurity paired with an excess of spare time.

This is spot on. Isn’t it telling that whoever started this thread referred to it as a “war”, and is trying to put down daycare facilities and those that use them? And when they are pushed to answer why they care, they don’t answer? It’s someone with an agenda trying to justify their choices.

I see this from a lens of a little more pity— this is someone trying to create a micro-hierarchy in which her (presumed) choice is better than another choice which people keep “unfairly” conflating. Here she is using a a preschool and other people are saying THEY are using a preschool and that undermines her place in the pretend ranking she’s creating.

That’s someone who is on the absolute edge with nothing validating her parenting other than the possible tenuous distinction between preschool and “lesser” things like daycare. She needs a glass of wine and a decent mom-friend, stat.

I’m the person who said I call my child’s school a school because it’s in the name. But OP? If you call it a daycare in your mind? And that makes you feel good? That’s ok with me! You’re not hurting my feelings! My kid isn’t going to be harmed by your preference to call it a daycare.

Just don’t call my daughter’s teachers “daycare workers” and we’re good— they’ve taught her a ton and they deserve recognition for that.

[Anonymous]

They are two different things. One is lower class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are two different things. One is lower class.

Who do you think is seeking out your views on the socioeconomic status signaled by where their child spends the day? Who is your perceived audience?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What an absolutely insane thing to care about. My kids went to both day care and preschool. We never did a preschool program within a daycare but if someone told me they were good and a preschool program I would believe them because I’m not insane? I was lucky enough to be able to keep my days short even when I had access to longer days at daycare and kept the same hours when they went to a full day preschool. I have never heard anyone say preschool has to be a half day. The programs I know of like that are typically called “nursery school “ in. The official name. But if someone called it preschool I’m sure I could figure out what they meant!

Why do so many people need to find ways to diminish other people’s choices. There is no real hierarchy in any way. I was happier with our daycare than the first preschool I sent my kids to (which I see recommended on her alll the time- but the teachers while qualified yell a lot). I was probably happiest with the preschool my youngest went to. Who cares what they are called- I needed childcare and wanted my kids to be happy and learning while they were away from me.

Insecurity paired with an excess of spare time.

This is spot on. Isn’t it telling that whoever started this thread referred to it as a “war”, and is trying to put down daycare facilities and those that use them? And when they are pushed to answer why they care, they don’t answer? It’s someone with an agenda trying to justify their choices.

I see this from a lens of a little more pity— this is someone trying to create a micro-hierarchy in which her (presumed) choice is better than another choice which people keep “unfairly” conflating. Here she is using a a preschool and other people are saying THEY are using a preschool and that undermines her place in the pretend ranking she’s creating.

That’s someone who is on the absolute edge with nothing validating her parenting other than the possible tenuous distinction between preschool and “lesser” things like daycare. She needs a glass of wine and a decent mom-friend, stat.

I’m the person who said I call my child’s school a school because it’s in the name. But OP? If you call it a daycare in your mind? And that makes you feel good? That’s ok with me! You’re not hurting my feelings! My kid isn’t going to be harmed by your preference to call it a daycare.

Just don’t call my daughter’s teachers “daycare workers” and we’re good— they’ve taught her a ton and they deserve recognition for that.

This is the definition of a Mommy War. These types of war happen so frequently with mothers who are trying to elevate their choices over the choices made by others. Preschool vs daycare is no different than the many other Mommy Wars, it's completely fabricated to allow some mothers to claim superiority over other mothers, e.g. bottle vs breast, SAH vs WFH, vs WOH, cloth vs disposable diapers, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are two different things. One is lower class.

The only thing that is lower class here is you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are two different things. One is lower class.

Yes, the insecure person who started this thread in an attempt to cut other people and their choices down sure is low class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a difference. Daycare is childcare for parents’ working hours, and something I consider is for infants/ babies/ young toddlers. A preschool program is… not that. Though a daycare could have a preschool program for their age 3+ learners! Also, I have no problem calling any of the daycare workers teachers (I’m sure they’re teaching the alphabet/ counting/ social skills etc.), but to the pp that said someone with a degree in early childhood development is a teacher, that’s a very different program than early childhood education (where they learn curriculum & instruction, pedagogy, the science of reading, etc.). In my experience, friends that sent their 9 month olds to daycare and called it school just wanted to feel better about sending their kids to daycare. Ps- there’s nothing wrong with daycare!! It’s not a bad thing! Just silly to act like your young baby is learning a curriculum and it’s not just childcare.

This is a good distinction. Why would anyone assume that a 12 month old would be in preschool? Daycare is all day childcare. Preschool is a few hours during the day 2-5x/week where the structure and focus is early childhood education. When someone says they’re picking their 4 year old up from preschool at 5:30 pm it’s clear that they’re referring to daycare.

So what? The 4 yo thinks of it as preschool, because they are attending a preschool program with before and aftercare built in. They probably call it that at home. Your insistence on calling it daycare is a very adult-centered way of thinking that is focused on social hierarchies. In other words, you sound really shallow.

Yes, your daycare is preschool with 6-7 hours of beforecare and aftercare built-in. Does that definition work for you? Also does name calling to diminish people who have different opinions from you make you feel good in real life or do you only do it on online forums?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a difference. Daycare is childcare for parents’ working hours, and something I consider is for infants/ babies/ young toddlers. A preschool program is… not that. Though a daycare could have a preschool program for their age 3+ learners! Also, I have no problem calling any of the daycare workers teachers (I’m sure they’re teaching the alphabet/ counting/ social skills etc.), but to the pp that said someone with a degree in early childhood development is a teacher, that’s a very different program than early childhood education (where they learn curriculum & instruction, pedagogy, the science of reading, etc.). In my experience, friends that sent their 9 month olds to daycare and called it school just wanted to feel better about sending their kids to daycare. Ps- there’s nothing wrong with daycare!! It’s not a bad thing! Just silly to act like your young baby is learning a curriculum and it’s not just childcare.

This is a good distinction. Why would anyone assume that a 12 month old would be in preschool? Daycare is all day childcare. Preschool is a few hours during the day 2-5x/week where the structure and focus is early childhood education. When someone says they’re picking their 4 year old up from preschool at 5:30 pm it’s clear that they’re referring to daycare.

So what? The 4 yo thinks of it as preschool, because they are attending a preschool program with before and aftercare built in. They probably call it that at home. Your insistence on calling it daycare is a very adult-centered way of thinking that is focused on social hierarchies. In other words, you sound really shallow.

Yes, your daycare is preschool with 6-7 hours of beforecare and aftercare built-in. Does that definition work for you? Also does name calling to diminish people who have different opinions from you make you feel good in real life or do you only do it on online forums?

"Shallow" is not name calling, it's just an adjective.