Is this childcare situation strange or too good to be true?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$550 a week or a month? You posted both.

I'd check references really carefully. But I would do that anyway. It could be great, but I would worry a little that she's doing this because she thinks it's fun, or because she's focused on the benefit to her own child, and that she might quit abruptly if she realizes it isn't that fun to have 2, or that she might prioritize her daughter over your child.

I imagine its a month because $18/hr for someone to watch your kid and theirs doesn't sound so low that people would be telling OP its too good to be true

No, a week. Which believe it or not is several hundred dollars cheaper than most decent daycares locally (that don’t have openings anyways).

We didn’t speak to a single nanny offering less than $20-25 an hour and I know many see the perks of having the child in your home but it has not worked for me. I have friends with nannies paying four figured a week easily.

But this isn't a nanny. She is a SAHM home with her own kid and you are bringing your kid over just three days per week. I would not pay much more than what she is offering.

$10-12 an hour is more reasonable given this isn't her job, she isn't paying taxes on it, she's not licensed and she has her own child.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$550 a week or a month? You posted both.

I'd check references really carefully. But I would do that anyway. It could be great, but I would worry a little that she's doing this because she thinks it's fun, or because she's focused on the benefit to her own child, and that she might quit abruptly if she realizes it isn't that fun to have 2, or that she might prioritize her daughter over your child.

I imagine its a month because $18/hr for someone to watch your kid and theirs doesn't sound so low that people would be telling OP its too good to be true

No, a week. Which believe it or not is several hundred dollars cheaper than most decent daycares locally (that don’t have openings anyways).

We didn’t speak to a single nanny offering less than $20-25 an hour and I know many see the perks of having the child in your home but it has not worked for me. I have friends with nannies paying four figured a week easily.

But this isn't a nanny. She is a SAHM home with her own kid and you are bringing your kid over just three days per week. I would not pay much more than what she is offering.

$10-12 an hour is more reasonable given this isn't her job, she isn't paying taxes on it, she's not licensed and she has her own child.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

She’s still legally have to pay taxes on this. She’s be paying 1099.

And god I hope you aren’t paying someone who cares for your child and fixed them nutritious meals under minimum wage.

Do y’all even love your children?

[Anonymous]

I'd probably take this, it sounds like a good arrangement.

But mostly, I'm sort of turned off by your classist assumptions about this woman -- you seem to think it's the best option of everything else because she "is wealthy" and everything is like a "PB kids catalog" instead of "crappy plastic toys." You do realize that wealthy people aren't inherently better caregivers than MC or LC folks, right? There's literally no correlation between wealthy and "great daycare." And toddler won't care at all that everything is in muted pastels and wooden, versus bright plastic. Your obsessive comments about how wealthy she is are just really disturbing.

[Anonymous]

Sounds sketchy AF

Usually very nice people and showing off are the worst. They hide their real intentions

[Anonymous]

I don't think this sounds any more concerning than any other kind of in-home nanny arrangement where the parent is not present.

Due diligence -- have a contract.

Be clear on situations like: if your child is sick and does not come, do you still pay? If she or her child is sick and contagious and YOUR child cannot share the space, do you not pay? Does she arrange for backup care or is that on you? How much vacation will she have per year and what amount of notice do you want? If you go on vacation, will you still pay her?

Put in a four weeks notice clause -- if either you or the other family wants to quit the arrangement, you will give (or pay) for four weeks (either you pay her or she arranges for 4 weeks of backup care for you, something like that).

Make sure you are paying minimum wage and taxes. The one thing you don't want to lose sight of is that this is still an employer-employee arrangement, and you are the employer.

[Anonymous]

I did something like that; I have three kids and stayed home with them, watched a neighbor’s toddler for cash. I didn’t charge much because my kids were with me, but I treated her child like my own and fed her, played with her and taught her a second language. My kids adored the toddler and they played together a lot. Tbh I think it’s the best set-up if you don’t have a lot of money and want a safe and “natural” family environment. I would totally do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I did something like that; I have three kids and stayed home with them, watched a neighbor’s toddler for cash. I didn’t charge much because my kids were with me, but I treated her child like my own and fed her, played with her and taught her a second language. My kids adored the toddler and they played together a lot. Tbh I think it’s the best set-up if you don’t have a lot of money and want a safe and “natural” family environment. I would totally do it.

The only thing is this isn't a "don't have a lot of money situation" 550/week is still 2,383/month for 30 hours a week of care - I pay 2609/month for my toddler at a childcare center with low ratios for 45-50 hours a week of care (no lunch provided though.)

That doesn't mean it's not worth trying - just that it's not such a great deal so as to be "too good to be true"

I agree with pp poster that a contract is important and working out contigencies is important as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did something like that; I have three kids and stayed home with them, watched a neighbor’s toddler for cash. I didn’t charge much because my kids were with me, but I treated her child like my own and fed her, played with her and taught her a second language. My kids adored the toddler and they played together a lot. Tbh I think it’s the best set-up if you don’t have a lot of money and want a safe and “natural” family environment. I would totally do it.

The only thing is this isn't a "don't have a lot of money situation" 550/week is still 2,383/month for 30 hours a week of care - I pay 2609/month for my toddler at a childcare center with low ratios for 45-50 hours a week of care (no lunch provided though.)

That doesn't mean it's not worth trying - just that it's not such a great deal so as to be "too good to be true"

I agree with pp poster that a contract is important and working out contigencies is important as well.

I guess, but I still think it’s a pretty good set up for that age. A SAHM who loves children would be my choice for childcare because it is a natural setting for a toddler; the child is in a warm home with a consistent family and the rhythm and play of sibling relationships. It’s quite a bit cheaper than a nanny but you still get the benefits of flexibility to go to parks and museums.

[Anonymous]

If you fuk up the relationship that mom will gossip about you through all the neighborhood

[Anonymous]

I wish my SAHM dw (1 child) would do this. Instead she just buys all that PB stuff and I pay for it. We’re going broke

[Anonymous]

The PP who suggested a contract, right idea but I doubt the babysitting mom will do it. She’s not an employee. She’s not going to commit to “x” vacation. That’s the too good to be true. If they TRULY don’t need the money she’s not going to stay back and watch your kid if her DH has an amazing travel opportunity and she wants to go along.

[Anonymous]

I have an only-by-choice and I can see the benefits she would be getting. The sibling experience is very very valuable, it's a major benefit my only child gets from daycare. Many parents of onlies (myself included) are concerned about "only child syndrome" traits like being spoiled, wanting 1:1 attention all the time, etc. so she is probably trying to combat that. I think it's great. Just get everything in writing if you pursue it.

[Anonymous]

Lucky! Do it!!!!

[Anonymous]

DD started today and it went wonderfully.

She didn’t even want to come home with me and I got so much work done I will have time to go run errands the next two days.

The Mom sent tons of pictures and it looked like DD and her daughter has a lot to fun. Very similar to a Montessori school as far as activities went. Water play (no, not a pool), sensory play and very delicious looking healthy meals.

DD even napped which I didn’t think she’d do in a new environment.

We also ended up coming up with a contract that made me feel more comfortable. She outlined planned vacations for her (one week later this summer and two in December). She really seems like she wants this to work out longterm so I’m hopeful, but also staying realistic.

For now I’m just thrilled to be able to get my work done in peace. I felt comfortable where DD was. I saw that she was happy and felt like she was safe which was really all I wanted. All well within our budget, so yes, for now I am happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$550 a week or a month? You posted both.

I'd check references really carefully. But I would do that anyway. It could be great, but I would worry a little that she's doing this because she thinks it's fun, or because she's focused on the benefit to her own child, and that she might quit abruptly if she realizes it isn't that fun to have 2, or that she might prioritize her daughter over your child.

I imagine its a month because $18/hr for someone to watch your kid and theirs doesn't sound so low that people would be telling OP its too good to be true

No, a week. Which believe it or not is several hundred dollars cheaper than most decent daycares locally (that don’t have openings anyways).

We didn’t speak to a single nanny offering less than $20-25 an hour and I know many see the perks of having the child in your home but it has not worked for me. I have friends with nannies paying four figured a week easily.

But this isn't a nanny. She is a SAHM home with her own kid and you are bringing your kid over just three days per week. I would not pay much more than what she is offering.

It’s still the cheapest option we’ve received.

There was a home daycare that was $500 a week but it was really not great. Lots of old broken plastic toys and snot nosed kids.

This house looks like a PB Kids catalogue

So, she has a spending habit she needs to maintain. If she were on the up and up she'd get a license. A nice home doesn't mean good care.

You have a lucky find OP. You mentioned she only had 1 daughter? Many people with serious $$ can't have more than 1 kid...including women who love children. So this is her way of fulfilling that.