Woman with VP level jobs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you manage the work life balance if you are a woman with a high powered career? I do t mean the outsourcing of things like a cleaning service but how do you carve out quality time to be present with your kids? I just started a job as a VP at a new company and the demands on my time seem excessive (after work events, team dinners, travel every week and 8 am meetings which make school drop off impossible ). I am constantly getting emails over the weekend, late at night - basically 24/7. My DH has a flexible job and has picked up most of the kid related stuff but I want to be able to be present in my kids life too. I was an AVP at my old job and while there were busy times, I had much better W/L balance. I’m not lazy but need help establishing some boundaries. Also my company talks a lot about being there for working parents but doesn’t walk the walk.

I work in a big 4 accounting firm.

Honestly, the most accomplished and highly promoted women in the firm don’t have families.

I have also observed this.

[Anonymous]

OP you are teaching your kids that money & having a luxurious lifestyle are the only things that matter in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God, I wish that corporate leaders (read male leaders) would read this thread and understand what it's like.

I actually left a big PR agency and started my own firm. It was a ton of work to get it off the ground, but now I have more flexibility over my schedule and time with my kids. I now offer actual flexibility to my employees as part of our values. I had to - plus the women on our team, with and without kids seem to enjoy the no-questions asked time off. I don't need to know if they take time off for a sick kid, a sick pet, or a desire to drink margs and eat chips on a Wednesday. The productivity and deliverables far exceed the work being done at the big firm.

I don’t get why anyone wants to be executive except greed and $$$$$.

So you’re saying you don’t make good money. Got it.

There are trade offs in life. Making “good money” isn’t useful if you need a nanny, cook, driver, housekeeper, lawn care specialists, etc to stay afloat from day-to-day. Oh and you never see your kids.

we have most of these, living in an area of the world where we can afford it, and I can tell you I LOVE it. And I do see my kids, I agree with that not being useful.

[Anonymous]

OP your job sounds uniquely tough. I am an SVP and it is a lot but a few things make it work:

1) I pay someone to take my tweens to after-school activities. I often pick them up after activities but she drives them places between 3 and 5pm
2) minimal work travel and evening work events
3) minimal weekend emails (I sometimes use weekends to catch up on work I rarely get work emails on weekends)
4) DH does a lot at home (and works from home)
5) My kids happened to pick sports/activities (rock climbing, orchestra and swimming) that are easier on working parents - no weeknight games and parents don't watch practices. Plus there are some weekend practices, which give me time to catch up on work.

I pretty much spend all my time either working, with my kids, exercising, or sleeping. I am trying to make more time for friends but I definitely don't have any hobbies. DH and I talk or hang out for about 20 min a night during the week after kids go to bed and maybe an hour or two on Sat night. Most of the time we are working after they go to bed. DH works more than me at night so even if I took a more low-key job, we would not get more quality time in the evening (I tried that once and all it meant was that I was reading the New Yorker in full each week instead of barely making it through Talk of the Town).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP your job sounds uniquely tough. I am an SVP and it is a lot but a few things make it work:

1) I pay someone to take my tweens to after-school activities. I often pick them up after activities but she drives them places between 3 and 5pm
2) minimal work travel and evening work events
3) minimal weekend emails (I sometimes use weekends to catch up on work I rarely get work emails on weekends)
4) DH does a lot at home (and works from home)
5) My kids happened to pick sports/activities (rock climbing, orchestra and swimming) that are easier on working parents - no weeknight games and parents don't watch practices. Plus there are some weekend practices, which give me time to catch up on work.

I pretty much spend all my time either working, with my kids, exercising, or sleeping. I am trying to make more time for friends but I definitely don't have any hobbies. DH and I talk or hang out for about 20 min a night during the week after kids go to bed and maybe an hour or two on Sat night. Most of the time we are working after they go to bed. DH works more than me at night so even if I took a more low-key job, we would not get more quality time in the evening (I tried that once and all it meant was that I was reading the New Yorker in full each week instead of barely making it through Talk of the Town).

Wow. Good for you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you manage the work life balance if you are a woman with a high powered career? I do t mean the outsourcing of things like a cleaning service but how do you carve out quality time to be present with your kids? I just started a job as a VP at a new company and the demands on my time seem excessive (after work events, team dinners, travel every week and 8 am meetings which make school drop off impossible ). I am constantly getting emails over the weekend, late at night - basically 24/7. My DH has a flexible job and has picked up most of the kid related stuff but I want to be able to be present in my kids life too. I was an AVP at my old job and while there were busy times, I had much better W/L balance. I’m not lazy but need help establishing some boundaries. Also my company talks a lot about being there for working parents but doesn’t walk the walk.

I work in a big 4 accounting firm.

Honestly, the most accomplished and highly promoted women in the firm don’t have families.

+1 Same here & have observed that

Is this suppose to be a bad thing? Good for them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interestingly an NPR Foreign Correspondent wrote a memoir about this.

https://www.npr.org/2023/04/06/1168376550/nprs-mary-louise-kelly-on-motherhood-chasing-the-news

Her husband was Big Law, so I assume there were a LOT of nannies involved, but she did take a break for 5 years to be present — that won’t be an option for a VP.

Of note, both kids are heading to college by next year — and her husband has asked for a divorce.

This is great. Now she is free of him and has a great career. Good for her!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My college mate is super successful woman VP. Net worth is easily in 20-30 million. Divorced, no partner, no kids.

Lives alone in SF. Age 57.

This is my dream life!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:VP here …childfree!

If true, You are so sad. On so many levels. That you would post it with exclamations. You didn’t need to forego family for a career, you missed out.

Missing out on what? Another childfree here that values their freedom. Would never ever want your life. ✌️

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My college mate is super successful woman VP. Net worth is easily in 20-30 million. Divorced, no partner, no kids.

Lives alone in SF. Age 57.

What are her cats' names?

Does not even have cats. I do not envy her. But, yes, she has a Wiki page dedicated to her!

Well, hell! That's awesome; it means strangers can look her up an envy her! Really, nothing like having no children or spouse but a wiki page! Really the pinnacle of human achievement. Nietzsche and Schopenhauer would be so proud.

Nobody cares about your kids or spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God, I wish that corporate leaders (read male leaders) would read this thread and understand what it's like.

I actually left a big PR agency and started my own firm. It was a ton of work to get it off the ground, but now I have more flexibility over my schedule and time with my kids. I now offer actual flexibility to my employees as part of our values. I had to - plus the women on our team, with and without kids seem to enjoy the no-questions asked time off. I don't need to know if they take time off for a sick kid, a sick pet, or a desire to drink margs and eat chips on a Wednesday. The productivity and deliverables far exceed the work being done at the big firm.

I don’t get why anyone wants to be executive except greed and $$$$$.

So you’re saying you don’t make good money. Got it.

There’s “good money” and then there’s thinking you need to make $500k/year to be happy.

I make 500k part time remote. What the big deal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women commenting that it’s not worth it, they’d rather make less money than work harder etc. have not had the opportunity to be a VP or anything close— let’s be real. They don’t have career ambition and that’s fine. It’s fine for people to be different. It doesn’t make you better or worse. But there are plenty of women who are able to make real careers work in corporate and their kids are perfectly fine, happy, well adjusted and benefiting from a lifestyle that couldn’t be afforded otherwise. This is of course company and job dependent but it’s definitely not impossible for many, many women, including me (VP with kids under 8).

What an insufferable twat. A “real career”?

Wow.. somebody jealous on here