Turning down admissions offers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
PP here - yes. I'm from the NE. None of these schools are as strong as the top ones in NYC or the NE boarding. I truly don't understand the Sidwell obsession.

+1 (not from NE, but familiar with several schools elsewhere)

Before moving to metro DC, only the Cathedral schools were really on our radar. (I’ve since become impressed with Sidwell’s marketing skills, but no chance we would apply there, which should make Sidwell fans happy.)

If you live in DC, why does it matter if NE boarding/NYC private schools are “better” than Sidwell (and that’s highly debatable). Are you planning to have your child commute from DC to NYC to attend school everyday?

PP did not read the bit quoted above where it says “not from NE”. The question posed above is irrelevant to the previous comment which was cited.

There are several local privates we would seriously consider, but Sidwell is not on that list. We would not apply there. Clearly, some folks love Sidwell and they can send their DC to Sidwell. We will not. Degustibus non disputantum est.

Reading is indeed fundamental.

I responded to the original post (“PP here - yes. I'm from the NE. None of these schools are as strong as the top ones in NYC or the NE boarding”), which “not from NE” agreed with (“+1“). Once again, if you live in DC it’s completely irrelevant to this discussion if you think NYC (or NE boarding schools, Harvard-Westlake, etc…) are better than Sidwell. If your child isn’t going to commute from DC to NYC everyday to attend school, your opinion about the relative quality of these schools doesn’t matter.

Btw, neither I nor Sidwell are losing any sleep because you won’t apply to the school. I’m not trying to convince you to do anything.

[Anonymous]

Having gone to a NE boarding school, I am still choosing to send my children to Sidwell. I will not be considering the NE boarding schools that so many seem to fall all over themselves for largely based on my own experiences there as a kid. I think the bottom line is that not every school is going be everyone's first choice. We loved Sidwell and my oldest really felt like it was the school for her when she went. It's impossible for every family to feel that same way we did because we aren't all the same. I walked into Beauvoir and immediately felt like it was NOT the community for us, but I totally respect that for some people that place is the best for them.

[Anonymous]

This is where fit is really important. We walked in to Sidwell and it was an immediate “no”, and the kids are now at Beauvoir. It seems like there are a few Sidwell boosters on this board (not PP who was talking about fit) because on every one of the admissions threads the past few weeks someone was always chiming in asking about Sidwell when people were posting results. Maybe it’s one person that’s obsessed. It’s very strange. I don’t know why they don’t believe that it’s possible for people to just not like the school. Maybe an insecurity about their own choice. Either way, I think it’s awesome PP that you felt the love so strongly and it ended up working out for your family!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is where fit is really important. We walked in to Sidwell and it was an immediate “no”, and the kids are now at Beauvoir. It seems like there are a few Sidwell boosters on this board (not PP who was talking about fit) because on every one of the admissions threads the past few weeks someone was always chiming in asking about Sidwell when people were posting results. Maybe it’s one person that’s obsessed. It’s very strange. I don’t know why they don’t believe that it’s possible for people to just not like the school. Maybe an insecurity about their own choice. Either way, I think it’s awesome PP that you felt the love so strongly and it ended up working out for your family!

+1 Fit is what matters most, IMO. We would not complete the Sidwell application process based on what we learned and experienced along the way. The pressure cooker environment, exclusionary parent community, and MS staff turnover were enough to pull the plug on what turned into a "hard pass" for us. Reputation alone should never be the decision maker, rather the fit for your family and DC's needs from a school. For some, Sidwell is it and for others it absolutely is not. There are apparent Sidwell operatives (lol) who oddly work part-time touting the school on this board just like there are a few others who seem committed to dismissing particular schools based on obsolete info. Strange behavior, but ultimately, families need to directly explore schools and use facts + personal experience to gauge fit rather than rely on real or perceived reputation.

[Anonymous]

How does it affect siblings in the future?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is where fit is really important. We walked in to Sidwell and it was an immediate “no”, and the kids are now at Beauvoir. It seems like there are a few Sidwell boosters on this board (not PP who was talking about fit) because on every one of the admissions threads the past few weeks someone was always chiming in asking about Sidwell when people were posting results. Maybe it’s one person that’s obsessed. It’s very strange. I don’t know why they don’t believe that it’s possible for people to just not like the school. Maybe an insecurity about their own choice. Either way, I think it’s awesome PP that you felt the love so strongly and it ended up working out for your family!

I don't think Sidwell needs boosters on here. Plenty of folks are still falling all over themselves to get into the school. But hey - different strokes for different folks. Luckily, there are some for whom it isn't the school. And I am thankful for those people because they are one less family I had to compete with in the process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: … ultimately, families need to directly explore schools and use facts + personal experience to gauge fit rather than rely on real or perceived reputation.

+1

People should explore, visit, and read about multiple schools for themselves and draw their own conclusions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does it affect siblings in the future?

Fairly or unfairly, everything impacts siblings. Ultimately, a school decides if it wants to be closer to family or less committed to a family. The credentials of the applying sibling obviously matter, but is only part of the equation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How does it affect siblings in the future?

Fairly or unfairly, everything impacts siblings. Ultimately, a school decides if it wants to be closer to family or less committed to a family. The credentials of the applying sibling obviously matter, but is only part of the equation.

The credentials of the existing sibling matter most.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is turning down an admissions offer and reapplying the following school year to the more exclusive privates heavily frowned upon? Our family is a having hard time determining which school year would be best to switch the kids to private due to some work issues. We are not sure how bad it would look to apply, be accepted, turn down, then reapply the following year?

Depends on the school. Do NOT turn Sidwell down. It's the Harvard of the USA's private schools so they never need to chase you. But at other schools maybe.

Agree don't turn Sidwell down. But Harvard of the USA private schools? You seriously need to get out more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is turning down an admissions offer and reapplying the following school year to the more exclusive privates heavily frowned upon? Our family is a having hard time determining which school year would be best to switch the kids to private due to some work issues. We are not sure how bad it would look to apply, be accepted, turn down, then reapply the following year?

Depends on the school. Do NOT turn Sidwell down. It's the Harvard of the USA's private schools so they never need to chase you. But at other schools maybe.

Sorry, no, Sidwell is not the Harvard of USA Private Schools. That is at best a parochial view, from someone who is not aware of the top schools in the NE, on the west coast, etc. Most folks would say Exeter & Andover, maybe along with Grottlesex, are the Ivys of private schools.

Certainly, we would reject Sidwell in favor of several other local schools - actually, we would not bother to apply because even we’d pick our public over Sidwell. Clearly some other folks here will have alternative views.

You would reject Sidwell in favor of which local private school? With the exception of special cases (i.e., preference for single gender, religious or public/free), I honestly can’t think of a single local school I would choose over Sidwell. Btw, I’m not (currently) a Sidwell parent. My children attend a private K-8th.

GDS, NCS, Maret, Holton, STA - if you want intense/rigorous.

Many more if you want a gentler school experience.

Ours rejected Sidwell in favor of Walls. Wasn't an issue of $$, just had a better feeling about SWW.

I can’t imagine choosing any of those schools over Sidwell (especially NCS/STA if you’re seeking a “gentler school experience”). If I’m paying anything close to $50K annually, I’m going for the school with the best overall reputation and name recognition…and that’s objectively Sidwell.

To each his/her own.

We didn’t even apply to Sidwell. Enrolling at Beauvoir for greatest chance at the Cathedral Schools. I was totally unimpressed with Sidwell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It would be extremely unusual for a place like Sidwell, STA to give you a spot, have you turn it down and then give you a spot again the following year.
Maybe if you were an URM family with an Olympic athlete kid.

They simply don't have to play your games. They have plenty of kids they can take without wondering if you'll take the spot on try #2.

This is exactly right. The big 3 won’t reconsider usually unless you have a really good reason like you thought you were moving but then didn’t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is turning down an admissions offer and reapplying the following school year to the more exclusive privates heavily frowned upon? Our family is a having hard time determining which school year would be best to switch the kids to private due to some work issues. We are not sure how bad it would look to apply, be accepted, turn down, then reapply the following year?

Depends on the school. Do NOT turn Sidwell down. It's the Harvard of the USA's private schools so they never need to chase you. But at other schools maybe.

Do you ever say something like that out loud, in front of people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
PP here - yes. I'm from the NE. None of these schools are as strong as the top ones in NYC or the NE boarding. I truly don't understand the Sidwell obsession.

+1 (not from NE, but familiar with several schools elsewhere)

Before moving to metro DC, only the Cathedral schools were really on our radar. (I’ve since become impressed with Sidwell’s marketing skills, but no chance we would apply there, which should make Sidwell fans happy.)

If you live in DC, why does it matter if NE boarding/NYC private schools are “better” than Sidwell (and that’s highly debatable). Are you planning to have your child commute from DC to NYC to attend school everyday?

PP did not read the bit quoted above where it says “not from NE”. The question posed above is irrelevant to the previous comment which was cited.

There are several local privates we would seriously consider, but Sidwell is not on that list. We would not apply there. Clearly, some folks love Sidwell and they can send their DC to Sidwell. We will not. Degustibus non disputantum est.


Agree 100%

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is turning down an admissions offer and reapplying the following school year to the more exclusive privates heavily frowned upon? Our family is a having hard time determining which school year would be best to switch the kids to private due to some work issues. We are not sure how bad it would look to apply, be accepted, turn down, then reapply the following year?

Depends on the school. Do NOT turn Sidwell down. It's the Harvard of the USA's private schools so they never need to chase you. But at other schools maybe.

All the overzealous Sidwell snobbery in this forum is really beginning to paint a picture of the culture that must exist there. Our family is a year away from making a decision about public vs. private in DC and all I can say at this point is that my impression of Sidwell parents is not positive. Albeit from a limited sample, but I don't get a superiority complex vibe with any of the other privates discussed.