Thanksgiving with two vegan guests; please help me plan!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you could serve them something like this? https://fieldroast.com/product/celebration-roast/

I’ve heard good reviews from vegan friends.

OP, this is a good suggestion, but only if you know they eat and enjoy plant-based alternatives like that. My SIL bemoans that vegan burgers and the like are processed and that they are served to vegans all the time at social events. (Which…I have my opinions on that level of entitlement, I’m just saying.)

What do you mean by 'level of entitlement'? Junk food is junk food. Those vegan meats are junk. How is not wanting to eat junk 'entitled'?

they’re not junk. And tbh I would rather eat junk than support factory farming. I don’t think this makes me “ difficult” you need to be more aware of where your food comes from.

I don't want to support factory farms and I don't want to eat junk either. How is that entitled? Yes, "processed protein" "Isolated protein" etc etc is junk. Also loaded with sodium and yeast extract and MSG. Just because it's vegan doesn't mean it's healthy. It's processed crap.

Someone is trying to graciously accommodate you. If you can’t graciously eat what is served, decline invitations or bring your own food. When I go to a dinner party, I do not turn up my nose at what is served, nor do I complain that I have been served that food before and suggest alternatives for next time—this is literally what my SIL does. “Pasta again? Next time, you should try serving—“ That is entitled beyond. If you can’t graciously eat a few bites of a vegan burger that was provided for you out of consideration by your hosts, stay home. Not saying you have to gorge on tofurkey, but recognize the gesture and eat a few bites and fill up on sides. My goodness. SO entitled.

Uh, I am not even vegan. I am simply saying that someone who IS vegan has a right to "bemoan" that they are constantly getting served processed junk. That is not entitled. I'm sure that PP's SIL has eaten way more than her fair share of vegan burgers at this point.

If you were a gracious host, you would want to know that the special accommodations you're making for your vegan guests are processed junk. Instead you would rather they "graciously eat a few bites" and then wipe their lips and say, "Mmm, delicious!" I'm sure your guests eat a full meal before they come over anyway.

My parents are in their 80s, and host a few family dinners a year. Note that SIL doesn’t complain to my parents or even my brother that “vegan hot dogs again” at 4th of July, but she somehow feels she can offload this rude complaint onto me, like I’m going to say, “Yeah, my parents sure are dirtbags to try to include you in a BBQ, right on.” How about if it is a family event, either bring some of your own food to share (like normal people do) or make actual helpful suggestions to octogenarians who may not be 100% hip and with it when it comes to vegan fare.

"offloading this rude complaint onto me"? She's sharing her feelings with you. Like I said, she's stupid for considering you a friend. You clearly are not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you could serve them something like this? https://fieldroast.com/product/celebration-roast/

I’ve heard good reviews from vegan friends.

OP, this is a good suggestion, but only if you know they eat and enjoy plant-based alternatives like that. My SIL bemoans that vegan burgers and the like are processed and that they are served to vegans all the time at social events. (Which…I have my opinions on that level of entitlement, I’m just saying.)

What do you mean by 'level of entitlement'? Junk food is junk food. Those vegan meats are junk. How is not wanting to eat junk 'entitled'?

they’re not junk. And tbh I would rather eat junk than support factory farming. I don’t think this makes me “ difficult” you need to be more aware of where your food comes from.

I don't want to support factory farms and I don't want to eat junk either. How is that entitled? Yes, "processed protein" "Isolated protein" etc etc is junk. Also loaded with sodium and yeast extract and MSG. Just because it's vegan doesn't mean it's healthy. It's processed crap.

Someone is trying to graciously accommodate you. If you can’t graciously eat what is served, decline invitations or bring your own food. When I go to a dinner party, I do not turn up my nose at what is served, nor do I complain that I have been served that food before and suggest alternatives for next time—this is literally what my SIL does. “Pasta again? Next time, you should try serving—“ That is entitled beyond. If you can’t graciously eat a few bites of a vegan burger that was provided for you out of consideration by your hosts, stay home. Not saying you have to gorge on tofurkey, but recognize the gesture and eat a few bites and fill up on sides. My goodness. SO entitled.

Uh, I am not even vegan. I am simply saying that someone who IS vegan has a right to "bemoan" that they are constantly getting served processed junk. That is not entitled. I'm sure that PP's SIL has eaten way more than her fair share of vegan burgers at this point.

If you were a gracious host, you would want to know that the special accommodations you're making for your vegan guests are processed junk. Instead you would rather they "graciously eat a few bites" and then wipe their lips and say, "Mmm, delicious!" I'm sure your guests eat a full meal before they come over anyway.

Anyone who bemoans anything I serve is not getting invited back. How rude.

No problem. It's being done behind your back.

[Anonymous]

OP, I would not do anything special for them. They have made a lifestyle choice. If they had allergies, it would be different. Let them eat the salad and be happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you could serve them something like this? https://fieldroast.com/product/celebration-roast/

I’ve heard good reviews from vegan friends.

OP, this is a good suggestion, but only if you know they eat and enjoy plant-based alternatives like that. My SIL bemoans that vegan burgers and the like are processed and that they are served to vegans all the time at social events. (Which…I have my opinions on that level of entitlement, I’m just saying.)

What do you mean by 'level of entitlement'? Junk food is junk food. Those vegan meats are junk. How is not wanting to eat junk 'entitled'?

they’re not junk. And tbh I would rather eat junk than support factory farming. I don’t think this makes me “ difficult” you need to be more aware of where your food comes from.

I don't want to support factory farms and I don't want to eat junk either. How is that entitled? Yes, "processed protein" "Isolated protein" etc etc is junk. Also loaded with sodium and yeast extract and MSG. Just because it's vegan doesn't mean it's healthy. It's processed crap.

NP. Thanksgiving isn’t about eating healthy, and neither is veganism. They can eat the vegan option that OP is graciously willing to provide, or they can bring their own dish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you could serve them something like this? https://fieldroast.com/product/celebration-roast/

I’ve heard good reviews from vegan friends.

OP, this is a good suggestion, but only if you know they eat and enjoy plant-based alternatives like that. My SIL bemoans that vegan burgers and the like are processed and that they are served to vegans all the time at social events. (Which…I have my opinions on that level of entitlement, I’m just saying.)

What do you mean by 'level of entitlement'? Junk food is junk food. Those vegan meats are junk. How is not wanting to eat junk 'entitled'?

they’re not junk. And tbh I would rather eat junk than support factory farming. I don’t think this makes me “ difficult” you need to be more aware of where your food comes from.

I don't want to support factory farms and I don't want to eat junk either. How is that entitled? Yes, "processed protein" "Isolated protein" etc etc is junk. Also loaded with sodium and yeast extract and MSG. Just because it's vegan doesn't mean it's healthy. It's processed crap.

Someone is trying to graciously accommodate you. If you can’t graciously eat what is served, decline invitations or bring your own food. When I go to a dinner party, I do not turn up my nose at what is served, nor do I complain that I have been served that food before and suggest alternatives for next time—this is literally what my SIL does. “Pasta again? Next time, you should try serving—“ That is entitled beyond. If you can’t graciously eat a few bites of a vegan burger that was provided for you out of consideration by your hosts, stay home. Not saying you have to gorge on tofurkey, but recognize the gesture and eat a few bites and fill up on sides. My goodness. SO entitled.

Uh, I am not even vegan. I am simply saying that someone who IS vegan has a right to "bemoan" that they are constantly getting served processed junk. That is not entitled. I'm sure that PP's SIL has eaten way more than her fair share of vegan burgers at this point.

If you were a gracious host, you would want to know that the special accommodations you're making for your vegan guests are processed junk. Instead you would rather they "graciously eat a few bites" and then wipe their lips and say, "Mmm, delicious!" I'm sure your guests eat a full meal before they come over anyway.

My parents are in their 80s, and host a few family dinners a year. Note that SIL doesn’t complain to my parents or even my brother that “vegan hot dogs again” at 4th of July, but she somehow feels she can offload this rude complaint onto me, like I’m going to say, “Yeah, my parents sure are dirtbags to try to include you in a BBQ, right on.” How about if it is a family event, either bring some of your own food to share (like normal people do) or make actual helpful suggestions to octogenarians who may not be 100% hip and with it when it comes to vegan fare.

"offloading this rude complaint onto me"? She's sharing her feelings with you. Like I said, she's stupid for considering you a friend. You clearly are not.

Why isn’t she sharing her feelings with my brother, her husband, so he can help do something about it? I’m not going to join her in trashing my parents. If that’s what you expect from friends and family, you sure have a weird idea of friendship.

[Anonymous]

Just have some naturally vegan side dishes like steamed vegetables, salad, and one vegan dessert. That way they have options but it doesn't take over the whole meal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you could serve them something like this? https://fieldroast.com/product/celebration-roast/

I’ve heard good reviews from vegan friends.

OP, this is a good suggestion, but only if you know they eat and enjoy plant-based alternatives like that. My SIL bemoans that vegan burgers and the like are processed and that they are served to vegans all the time at social events. (Which…I have my opinions on that level of entitlement, I’m just saying.)

What do you mean by 'level of entitlement'? Junk food is junk food. Those vegan meats are junk. How is not wanting to eat junk 'entitled'?

they’re not junk. And tbh I would rather eat junk than support factory farming. I don’t think this makes me “ difficult” you need to be more aware of where your food comes from.

I don't want to support factory farms and I don't want to eat junk either. How is that entitled? Yes, "processed protein" "Isolated protein" etc etc is junk. Also loaded with sodium and yeast extract and MSG. Just because it's vegan doesn't mean it's healthy. It's processed crap.

Someone is trying to graciously accommodate you. If you can’t graciously eat what is served, decline invitations or bring your own food. When I go to a dinner party, I do not turn up my nose at what is served, nor do I complain that I have been served that food before and suggest alternatives for next time—this is literally what my SIL does. “Pasta again? Next time, you should try serving—“ That is entitled beyond. If you can’t graciously eat a few bites of a vegan burger that was provided for you out of consideration by your hosts, stay home. Not saying you have to gorge on tofurkey, but recognize the gesture and eat a few bites and fill up on sides. My goodness. SO entitled.

Uh, I am not even vegan. I am simply saying that someone who IS vegan has a right to "bemoan" that they are constantly getting served processed junk. That is not entitled. I'm sure that PP's SIL has eaten way more than her fair share of vegan burgers at this point.

If you were a gracious host, you would want to know that the special accommodations you're making for your vegan guests are processed junk. Instead you would rather they "graciously eat a few bites" and then wipe their lips and say, "Mmm, delicious!" I'm sure your guests eat a full meal before they come over anyway.

My parents are in their 80s, and host a few family dinners a year. Note that SIL doesn’t complain to my parents or even my brother that “vegan hot dogs again” at 4th of July, but she somehow feels she can offload this rude complaint onto me, like I’m going to say, “Yeah, my parents sure are dirtbags to try to include you in a BBQ, right on.” How about if it is a family event, either bring some of your own food to share (like normal people do) or make actual helpful suggestions to octogenarians who may not be 100% hip and with it when it comes to vegan fare.

"offloading this rude complaint onto me"? She's sharing her feelings with you. Like I said, she's stupid for considering you a friend. You clearly are not.

Why isn’t she sharing her feelings with my brother, her husband, so he can help do something about it? I’m not going to join her in trashing my parents. If that’s what you expect from friends and family, you sure have a weird idea of friendship.

wow, you are very extreme. I'd done. Best of luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I would not do anything special for them. They have made a lifestyle choice. If they had allergies, it would be different. Let them eat the salad and be happy.

That would be terribly rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I would not do anything special for them. They have made a lifestyle choice. If they had allergies, it would be different. Let them eat the salad and be happy.

That would be terribly rude.

Seriously. It's like half these posters think that if someone decides to be vegetarian, no one is obligates to respect that on any level. The OP's cousin wasn't demanding a vegan Thanksgiving. OP was proactively looking for ways to include the vegan guests, without crossing lines that she thought would be problematic for others at the meal. If a vegan person is attending a dinner you are hosting, you are obligated to provide food they can eat. It doesn't matter from the host perspective if it's a food allergy or a dietary preference. Would you be making such a big stink about someone keeping kosher, another dietary preference that could inconvenience people? The polite way to handle, as a host, is to meet your guests' needs, not argue with them about whether they should want what they want or tell them "Let them eat salad" without irony.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I would not do anything special for them. They have made a lifestyle choice. If they had allergies, it would be different. Let them eat the salad and be happy.

That would be terribly rude.

Seriously. It's like half these posters think that if someone decides to be vegetarian, no one is obligates to respect that on any level. The OP's cousin wasn't demanding a vegan Thanksgiving. OP was proactively looking for ways to include the vegan guests, without crossing lines that she thought would be problematic for others at the meal. If a vegan person is attending a dinner you are hosting, you are obligated to provide food they can eat. It doesn't matter from the host perspective if it's a food allergy or a dietary preference. Would you be making such a big stink about someone keeping kosher, another dietary preference that could inconvenience people? The polite way to handle, as a host, is to meet your guests' needs, not argue with them about whether they should want what they want or tell them "Let them eat salad" without irony.

OP here. I don’t think I should have to clarify, but just in case I do: I will absolutely make or buy vegan dishes to be sure that everyone has a full plate, and I will not make anyone just eat salad.

That said, the idea of essentially doing what one person said and make sure there are an equal number of vegan and non-vegan foods isn’t happening. I simply don’t have the budget or the bandwidth. I’m going to look into the possibility of Whole Foods, and I’m going to discuss the tofurkey looking item that was suggested with my cousin. I’ll likely strike some happy medium between making some items vegan, making a portion of some items vegan (like pulling out a few mashed potatoes before adding cream/butter to the rest), and purchasing some vegan items. I won’t be hollowing out a pumpkin.

[Anonymous]

OP,

You sound kind. I recommend you talk to them before finalizing your plans and make sure what you’re planning to do will actually be something that works for them and is appreciated. I was assigned to bring desserts one year, and my husband’s side of the family includes one gluten free person and one gluten free/dairy free person. I thought I was doing a nice thing by special ordering very beautiful expensive gf/df personal apple pies from a local bakery that is fully gf (no cross contamination). It was an inconvenient place for me to go while simultaneously trying to bake regular desserts and pack my family to travel. Both people I bought the desserts for didn’t eat them or even taste them to be polite! The gf/df person packed her own fruit for dessert and the gf person just ate vanilla ice cream I had brought to serve with the pies. Lesson learned was that sometimes people with dietary restrictions are actually even more complex and disordered/picky about food than their restriction category indicates, so you may want to check if they even like mushrooms or potatoes or whatever so you don’t go to the trouble unless it will be eaten/appreciated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you're making it too complicated for yourself.

https://tofurky.com/what-we-make/roasts/feast/

Tofurky has a 'feast' which includes a vegan turkey with stuffing, gravy, and a brownie. I don't serve the brownie because I'm able to provide vegan pumpkin pie and it feels kind of weird/sad, but the roast and gravy + normally roasted vegetables in olive oil is a good solution. Having served this for my sister for many years I find I have to use extra vegetable broth and cover it tightly to prevent it from being too dry but otherwise she is happy with it.

You can add a few potatoes to the roasted vegetables and serve them instead of making 2 batches of mashed potatoes, or use vegan butter on all the mashed potatoes.

Vegetarian here - I think OP is being incredibly nice and thoughtful. Just be aware the Tofurky is notoriously terrible. I actually kind of like it, but it's awful - there are much better alternatives now.

I think some potatoes, roasted veggies, perhaps a vegan green bean casserole (very easy to make), cranberry sauce, and one of those Fieldroasts or some other thing like that is more than enough. Bread is always good. It's very easy to make a vegan stuffing, if you want to try it. Vegan mac and cheese is no sweat if you feel like giving it a go. You can buy a vegan pie from Trader Joe's or wherever - or vegan ice cream. There's tons of store bought options.

Maybe ask your cousin what they would eat if they were doing Thanksgiving for themselves for more ideas. It's probably easier for them to propose dishes than for you to try to guess what they will like. Bringing in is a great idea if you've got a local store that does pre-made vegan Thanksgiving food. I don't think most will last two days, but you can ask your WF what they think.

And on behalf of non-meaties everywhere, thank you for being accomodating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d skip the vegan mashed potatoes, just doesn’t sound good. Also can you do two batches of stuffing, one vegan and one not? I typically make two batches, one super traditional and one more “interesting” one.

Vegan mashed potatoes can be very good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d make green beans with almonds, a mix of roast vegetables and sweet potatoes, frozen corn as side dishes. I would not make stuffing vegan or make different versions as it can be confusing which is which.

Really doesn't have to be confusing. The vegan stuffing goes in a much smaller serving dish, and is placed near the vegans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just found out that my cousin and her new husband are vegan. They live far away, so they can’t bring anything for Thanksgiving. I’m hosting 16 total, and I’d say the other 14 guests (this count includes my family) are very traditional eaters. The only other factor is nut allergies, but that’s my kids so I naturally work that into the menu. I think the other guests are pretty traditional and expect the usual fare. I’m happy to do some extra work, but I’d love to pinch-hit with vegan store-bought items from Wegmans, if anyone happens to know of anything good.

Appetizers could be:
Veggies/chips with homemade French onion dip and hummus as the vegan option
Maybe shot glasses of vegan vichyssoise?

Dinner of:
Turkey, gravy
Mashed potatoes

Could make vegan versions of:
Mashed potatoes (small side dish that I would keep by and then add butter and cream/milk to the majority of the pot)
Burgundy mushrooms (I usually make with butter but I think I can easily make these vegan)
Dressing (easy enough to use vegetable stock instead of chicken stock, but I might get dinged by the majority for this as I think it wont’ t taste as good)
Cranberry sauce
Roasted vegetables
Maybe some type of roll? Does anyone know of a good vegan bread mix or cornbread mix or some such?

Dessert:
Traditional versions of pumpkin pie, apple pie and pecan pie
I could make apple pie filling for vegans and just have that warm in a crock pot?
Maybe add some kind of vegan brownie? Need help with dessert ideas

Is the above enough food for the vegans? They can make a plate of that, right?

Ask them. I'd do a baked potato for them but otherwise that looks good.