birthday party with embarrassing (too young) theme?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Immediate pp here. Ok so that’s not really what I meant. What I meant is that I think you are personally embarrassed, more than looking out for your kid, and that you want to shame him not to do something you are embarrassed by. I may be wrong but I’ve been there and know the impulse can be strong. Do not give in to this impulse. It’s wrong, and deep down you know it. Go light on the theme if you think best for your son, but remember that your child looks to YOU for assurance and support. Be that assurance and support. For me it was an unexpectedly hard part of the parenting job but has made a huge difference, I believe, for my kids.

I am the PP immediately before this post, but this not me.

[Anonymous]

I teach 3rd grade. I can not see any third grader not making fun of him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think this really depends on the kid. In my experience there is a certain kind of confident goofy kid who can totally get away with this. My kid had a friend who got really into Elmo in 4th or 5th grade and because he was the cool kid, suddenly all the kids were suddenly declaring allegiance to various muppets.
My younger kid is similar, and kids will come over and he’ll suggest something really young and the group will get all nostalgic and I will have middle school kids playing brio trains or something.

On the other hand, a socially awkward kid might read the room wrong and it could go bad.

I’d have a conversation, why Paw Patrol, how does he think his friends will react, etc . . . And decide together.

I think this is true. If he is “that” kid who has the cool confident energy his peers admire it’s possible he could pull this off. If he’s not, he will likely find that out and it’s very possible he will be teased. Does he have a close group of friends in the class who are in on the idea and think it would be funny/random etc? If not, I would encourage him to drop the theme or at least get a better feel for why he wants it in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the parent of two teens, including a 17 year old boy. I can’t tell you the number of times I decided to bite my tongue because he was doing things that I thought would wind up getting him bullied. And, frankly, he always my right and I was the one with the problem. He’s a self-assured young adult who trusts his judgment, chooses friends well, and is not particularly interested in what others think of his tastes. It’s sort of irrelevant, but he’s also very popular at school. Lots of people to hang out and do stuff with and an unusually high number of close friends from different social groups. And he knows that I alway, always have his back.

What’s the story with your other kid?

And If he were in this situation and kids were making comments, what would you have said?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the parent of two teens, including a 17 year old boy. I can’t tell you the number of times I decided to bite my tongue because he was doing things that I thought would wind up getting him bullied. And, frankly, he always my right and I was the one with the problem. He’s a self-assured young adult who trusts his judgment, chooses friends well, and is not particularly interested in what others think of his tastes. It’s sort of irrelevant, but he’s also very popular at school. Lots of people to hang out and do stuff with and an unusually high number of close friends from different social groups. And he knows that I alway, always have his back.

I agree with this and have a 15 year old. DH and I constantly think his ideas or looks are so off and then we see his friends and they aren’t. I mean, mullets are back…. My kid and his friend went through a phase when they kept talking about Jake and the Neverland Pirates. They hadn’t watched it in years but would have loved going to a themed party since they had constant conversations about it. Late elementary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe Paw Patrol is something he jokes with his friends about. My DD and her classmates last year (4th grade) had running jokes about Peppa Pig even though none of them had watched the show in years.

+1
My older kids also got into Peppa pig, Shrek, etc more as memes. One of my junior high kids even brought young themed cupcakes to school as a joke

Lol, I’m the PP and Shrek was also big amongst my DDs 4th grade class last year. OP, talk to your kid about why he wants Paw Patrol, it may very well be a joke his buddies are in on. If one of my kid’s friends had thrown a Shrek or Peppa Pig themed party last year the kids would have thought it was hilarious, and they all would have been in on the joke (me as the parent not so much). I don’t think this is as big of a deal as you are blowing it up into.

[Anonymous]

Oh, and if he asks you to play Rick Astley at his party, it’s definitely a goof with his friends. Kids in late ES have very interesting senses of humor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe Paw Patrol is something he jokes with his friends about. My DD and her classmates last year (4th grade) had running jokes about Peppa Pig even though none of them had watched the show in years.

+1
My older kids also got into Peppa pig, Shrek, etc more as memes. One of my junior high kids even brought young themed cupcakes to school as a joke

Lol, I’m the PP and Shrek was also big amongst my DDs 4th grade class last year. OP, talk to your kid about why he wants Paw Patrol, it may very well be a joke his buddies are in on. If one of my kid’s friends had thrown a Shrek or Peppa Pig themed party last year the kids would have thought it was hilarious, and they all would have been in on the joke (me as the parent not so much). I don’t think this is as big of a deal as you are blowing it up into.

I agree that OP should talk to her kid about why but I don’t think OP is blowing it up. It seems unlikely that a 3rd grader would come up with an ironic party theme. OP, I hope you report back, I’m so curious what inspired his idea!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe Paw Patrol is something he jokes with his friends about. My DD and her classmates last year (4th grade) had running jokes about Peppa Pig even though none of them had watched the show in years.

+1
My older kids also got into Peppa pig, Shrek, etc more as memes. One of my junior high kids even brought young themed cupcakes to school as a joke

Lol, I’m the PP and Shrek was also big amongst my DDs 4th grade class last year. OP, talk to your kid about why he wants Paw Patrol, it may very well be a joke his buddies are in on. If one of my kid’s friends had thrown a Shrek or Peppa Pig themed party last year the kids would have thought it was hilarious, and they all would have been in on the joke (me as the parent not so much). I don’t think this is as big of a deal as you are blowing it up into.

I agree that OP should talk to her kid about why but I don’t think OP is blowing it up. It seems unlikely that a 3rd grader would come up with an ironic party theme. OP, I hope you report back, I’m so curious what inspired his idea!

Ummm the kids aren’t trying to be ironic, kids that age now find the things they liked when they were little like Shrek, Peppa Pig, Caillou, etc. to be funny because there are a million memes about them. Everyone is going way too deep on the thoughts of a bunch of 3rd grade boys, but by all means don’t listen to the parents who have recently seen this phenomenon up close with their kids of the same age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe Paw Patrol is something he jokes with his friends about. My DD and her classmates last year (4th grade) had running jokes about Peppa Pig even though none of them had watched the show in years.

+1
My older kids also got into Peppa pig, Shrek, etc more as memes. One of my junior high kids even brought young themed cupcakes to school as a joke

Lol, I’m the PP and Shrek was also big amongst my DDs 4th grade class last year. OP, talk to your kid about why he wants Paw Patrol, it may very well be a joke his buddies are in on. If one of my kid’s friends had thrown a Shrek or Peppa Pig themed party last year the kids would have thought it was hilarious, and they all would have been in on the joke (me as the parent not so much). I don’t think this is as big of a deal as you are blowing it up into.

I agree that OP should talk to her kid about why but I don’t think OP is blowing it up. It seems unlikely that a 3rd grader would come up with an ironic party theme. OP, I hope you report back, I’m so curious what inspired his idea!

Ummm the kids aren’t trying to be ironic, kids that age now find the things they liked when they were little like Shrek, Peppa Pig, Caillou, etc. to be funny because there are a million memes about them. Everyone is going way too deep on the thoughts of a bunch of 3rd grade boys, but by all means don’t listen to the parents who have recently seen this phenomenon up close with their kids of the same age.

Late elementary school kids are not the same age as 3rd graders.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe Paw Patrol is something he jokes with his friends about. My DD and her classmates last year (4th grade) had running jokes about Peppa Pig even though none of them had watched the show in years.

+1
My older kids also got into Peppa pig, Shrek, etc more as memes. One of my junior high kids even brought young themed cupcakes to school as a joke

Lol, I’m the PP and Shrek was also big amongst my DDs 4th grade class last year. OP, talk to your kid about why he wants Paw Patrol, it may very well be a joke his buddies are in on. If one of my kid’s friends had thrown a Shrek or Peppa Pig themed party last year the kids would have thought it was hilarious, and they all would have been in on the joke (me as the parent not so much). I don’t think this is as big of a deal as you are blowing it up into.

I agree that OP should talk to her kid about why but I don’t think OP is blowing it up. It seems unlikely that a 3rd grader would come up with an ironic party theme. OP, I hope you report back, I’m so curious what inspired his idea!

Ummm the kids aren’t trying to be ironic, kids that age now find the things they liked when they were little like Shrek, Peppa Pig, Caillou, etc. to be funny because there are a million memes about them. Everyone is going way too deep on the thoughts of a bunch of 3rd grade boys, but by all means don’t listen to the parents who have recently seen this phenomenon up close with their kids of the same age.

Late elementary school kids are not the same age as 3rd graders.

Seriously, 4th grade is literally 1 grade after 3rd grade. There are red-shirted 3rd graders who should be in 4th. These are all kids roughly the same age. I’m going to guess you do not have kids this age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe Paw Patrol is something he jokes with his friends about. My DD and her classmates last year (4th grade) had running jokes about Peppa Pig even though none of them had watched the show in years.

+1
My older kids also got into Peppa pig, Shrek, etc more as memes. One of my junior high kids even brought young themed cupcakes to school as a joke

Lol, I’m the PP and Shrek was also big amongst my DDs 4th grade class last year. OP, talk to your kid about why he wants Paw Patrol, it may very well be a joke his buddies are in on. If one of my kid’s friends had thrown a Shrek or Peppa Pig themed party last year the kids would have thought it was hilarious, and they all would have been in on the joke (me as the parent not so much). I don’t think this is as big of a deal as you are blowing it up into.

I agree that OP should talk to her kid about why but I don’t think OP is blowing it up. It seems unlikely that a 3rd grader would come up with an ironic party theme. OP, I hope you report back, I’m so curious what inspired his idea!

Ummm the kids aren’t trying to be ironic, kids that age now find the things they liked when they were little like Shrek, Peppa Pig, Caillou, etc. to be funny because there are a million memes about them. Everyone is going way too deep on the thoughts of a bunch of 3rd grade boys, but by all means don’t listen to the parents who have recently seen this phenomenon up close with their kids of the same age.

Late elementary school kids are not the same age as 3rd graders.

Seriously, 4th grade is literally 1 grade after 3rd grade. There are red-shirted 3rd graders who should be in 4th. These are all kids roughly the same age. I’m going to guess you do not have kids this age.

You guessed wrong! I do have kids this age and I see how they and their friends are different from the 5th graders. The other PPs are talking about a 5th grader and middle schooler (and some high school kid with a mullet). OP is talking about someone who just started 3rd grade, and those new 3rd graders are in a much different place developmentally than last year’s 4th graders. And as a reminder, I didn’t say it was impossible that the paw patrol thing to earth this 3rd graders joke, I said I think it’s unlikely. You seem to think it’s likely. Whatever.

[Anonymous]

FFS people. The kid is not choosing Paw Patrol ironically.

Some of these responses are so off the mark it's unbelievable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:FFS people. The kid is not choosing Paw Patrol ironically.

Some of these responses are so off the mark it's unbelievable.

FFS it’s irony to an adult, but to an ES aged boy it’s just funny to him and his friends. If he hasn’t watched or paid attention to Paw Patrol since K, it’s more likely that it’s a joke with his friends than a sincere re-discovered love of Paw Patrol.

[Anonymous]

Thanks, all! I think we're going to have a talk about it. He doesn't have many close friends because his other interests are very grown up (only child), so this is a class-wide party and I can see it going wrong. The posters who've suggested he's wanting to do this ironically have got me thinking, though...