birthday party with embarrassing (too young) theme?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Were kids to say negative things about the theme, that would be chiding, criticizing, making fun of, etc.

It would NOT be “bullying.” Overuse of that word undermines its specific and significant meaning. And drives me crazy.

That's literally bullying, but somehow I'm not surprised a DCUM poster wouldn't make the connection.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were kids to say negative things about the theme, that would be chiding, criticizing, making fun of, etc.

It would NOT be “bullying.” Overuse of that word undermines its specific and significant meaning. And drives me crazy.

That's literally bullying, but somehow I'm not surprised a DCUM poster wouldn't make the connection.

New poster here. No it's not bullying. It's just being mean. Not every rude or mean act is bullying. Bullying is a targeted and repeated act. The rest is just being a jerk.

So if the friends left the party and mocked and teased this child for the rest of the year about his Paw Patrol decorations, yes that's bullying. If they come and say "Omg Paw Patrol is for babies!" and then move on after the party, that makes them rude or mean, but not bullies. There is a difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Were kids to say negative things about the theme, that would be chiding, criticizing, making fun of, etc.

It would NOT be “bullying.” Overuse of that word undermines its specific and significant meaning. And drives me crazy.

I CANNOT AGREE WITH THIS MORE!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is he inviting friends who would potentially bully him for this? They’re not friends. My 10yo is going to a 10yo classmate party and I asked the mom what she likes because the kids don’t know each other well. ( whole class invite) and the mom
Says she likes Stitch from Lilo and Stitch. No shame and my kid is not gonna be a jerk about it. We bought a Stitch water bottle.

I don't think 10 is old for loving Lilo & Stitch. Very typical, especially for a girl.
Only question is whether kids these days have seen it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were kids to say negative things about the theme, that would be chiding, criticizing, making fun of, etc.

It would NOT be “bullying.” Overuse of that word undermines its specific and significant meaning. And drives me crazy.

That's literally bullying, but somehow I'm not surprised a DCUM poster wouldn't make the connection.

New poster here. No it's not bullying. It's just being mean. Not every rude or mean act is bullying. Bullying is a targeted and repeated act. The rest is just being a jerk.

So if the friends left the party and mocked and teased this child for the rest of the year about his Paw Patrol decorations, yes that's bullying. If they come and say "Omg Paw Patrol is for babies!" and then move on after the party, that makes them rude or mean, but not bullies. There is a difference.

OP here. Which is why I don't want to do this party.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were kids to say negative things about the theme, that would be chiding, criticizing, making fun of, etc.

It would NOT be “bullying.” Overuse of that word undermines its specific and significant meaning. And drives me crazy.

That's literally bullying, but somehow I'm not surprised a DCUM poster wouldn't make the connection.

New poster here. No it's not bullying. It's just being mean. Not every rude or mean act is bullying. Bullying is a targeted and repeated act. The rest is just being a jerk.

So if the friends left the party and mocked and teased this child for the rest of the year about his Paw Patrol decorations, yes that's bullying. If they come and say "Omg Paw Patrol is for babies!" and then move on after the party, that makes them rude or mean, but not bullies. There is a difference.

OP here. Which is why I don't want to do this party.

Also, he's not inviting friends. He's inviting all his boy classmates.

[Anonymous]

If you are CERTAIN it will get him bullied, then pick a different theme.

Don't make it about Paw Patrol. Say, let's pick a more mature theme without characters, like outer space, tie dye, legos, now that you are turning 9. He must like other things. You can gently guide him.

Then definitely get Paw Patrol stuff for a separate at home celebration, even if it's just cutting cake after dinner.

[Anonymous]

I'm not CERTAIN. I just know I had a hard time with social expectations when I was a kid, and was bullied mercilessly for not fitting in. Obviously he'll deal with some of that, but I'd rather not let him walk directly into it when I can stop it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not CERTAIN. I just know I had a hard time with social expectations when I was a kid, and was bullied mercilessly for not fitting in. Obviously he'll deal with some of that, but I'd rather not let him walk directly into it when I can stop it.

You said you were certain in your OP so that's where my advice came from. I didn't realize that you weren't CERTAIN, just certain.

Anyway, I tried to be helpful with my advice to guide away from the theme. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand why you asked your kids what he wants and is a fine choice. Just let him have his birthday

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were kids to say negative things about the theme, that would be chiding, criticizing, making fun of, etc.

It would NOT be “bullying.” Overuse of that word undermines its specific and significant meaning. And drives me crazy.

That's literally bullying, but somehow I'm not surprised a DCUM poster wouldn't make the connection.

New poster here, and actually bullying is systemic. It's repeatedly making fun or repeatedly saying negative things. Not a one-off.

[Anonymous]

It's a bad idea, and I would discourage it. It will probably get him teased.

[Anonymous]

I can’t even imagine my kids at that age noticing the theme of plates … they would be focused on inhaling cupcakes. I would just include a few subtle touches to make your kid happy but not go overboard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t even imagine my kids at that age noticing the theme of plates … they would be focused on inhaling cupcakes. I would just include a few subtle touches to make your kid happy but not go overboard.

+1
I doubt that third-grade boys are paying that much attention to what character is printed on the paper plate holding their cupcake.

[Anonymous]

My 3rd grader was just invited to a “paw-some” party for a kid turning 8. It was not explicitly Paw Patrol, but I am not sure why the dog theme. This one didn’t specify a donation, but a popular party idea for 8-12 yr old girls in my neighborhood is to make something for the animal shelter or collect items they need and then visit the shelter to donate the items or sort/organize supplies for the shelter. The girls get to pet and hold dogs and also raise funds or donations for the shelter instead of gifts. I don’t know the details, but we have a few families in our neighborhood who are very active with the shelter and with fostering dogs - so I assume these parties are welcome and not a pain for the shelter to accommodate.