Went to a Super Bowl party & I will never be the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP.

Some questions I saw:
-Our department is made up of 6 people. Coworker has been with us since mid-November. She's a fun person & I've been out after work to have drinks with her and others in our dept. NO ONE KNEW about her son. We work 3 days in office/2 days at home. I'm telling you, the photo of her son on her desk looks legit like a real baby.

-Only 4 of us came to the party from our department. There was 8 people total the whole time and two neighbors of hers stopped by during halftime to see the show. Her husband was one of the people there. They don't seem weird if that makes sense. They seem like perfectly normal people but the way some people think of themselves as a Dog Mom, she's a Doll Mom? The husband held the baby but overall, it seems like it's more of her thing.

-Also, wtf else was I supposed to say when she took us on a house tour and showed us the freaking nursery?! The nursery was a lovely shade of pale blue-gray.

Like, I was just thrust into this weird ass situation and trying to figure out wtf was going on. I once went to NYC while in college and allowed myself to be pushed into a sketchy van on Canal street and driven around by Asian strangers with visible guns under their coats to buy knockoff designer bags and yet THIS was the most worried I'd been for my life.

I don't think this stems from trauma but who knows. I'm not touching that or asking about it. A coworker there did try to hint at it, I think, when they asked if Eli was their only child. She said that he was the only kid they wanted. I looked up these dolls and lifestyle on Instagram and it's not just people with trauma who like these dolls.

I told my sister about this experience last night and she laughed until she was crying and gasping for air because it is just like me to make a resolution to be more social and then put myself into such an odd social experience. I'm a homebody. The pandemic made me even worse. I'm not even saying my hobbies are better than hers, either! I'm really not making fun of her, I swear. When I get home from work, I toss on some trashy TV and spend my evenings doing jigsaw puzzles or diamond painting. Diamond painting...because I find the sounds of squishing the stones down very soothing & because I have no real artistic skill to really paint. I'm not some cool person.

OP, I really need to hear more about your experiences with the van full of Yakuza.

We were broke college kids who wanted designer bags. Another friend had gone to NYC for spring break and told us all about Canal street. A few weeks later we took the train up and hit up Canal street. We walked up to a lady selling bags on the street and told her we were looking for higher-end bags. She nodded and told us to follow her. We did down the street and around a corner. There was a maroon van parked on the street, she opened, the door, and shoved us in. Told us "fast, fast, fast!" and as soon as we were in, the van started driving. I remember looking at my friend like "fuuuuuu...my mom is going to be SO pissed at me for dying this way!" There were 2 Asian guys inside the van and another guy driving. The guys inside had visible guns tucked in their waistbands. They pulled back tarps and all the designer knockoffs you could want awaited us. Once we picked and paid, the van pulled over and we hopped out. I remember telling her that we'd just survived how SO many episodes of Law & Order and L&O SVU started.

We also followed armed Asians into sweatshop factories along Canal street, too. I'm super embarrassed by this behavior now, but in 2008, yeah, I didn't know better. Nor did I realize how I could have been arrested if that was an undercover sting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP.

Some questions I saw:
-Our department is made up of 6 people. Coworker has been with us since mid-November. She's a fun person & I've been out after work to have drinks with her and others in our dept. NO ONE KNEW about her son. We work 3 days in office/2 days at home. I'm telling you, the photo of her son on her desk looks legit like a real baby.

-Only 4 of us came to the party from our department. There was 8 people total the whole time and two neighbors of hers stopped by during halftime to see the show. Her husband was one of the people there. They don't seem weird if that makes sense. They seem like perfectly normal people but the way some people think of themselves as a Dog Mom, she's a Doll Mom? The husband held the baby but overall, it seems like it's more of her thing.

-Also, wtf else was I supposed to say when she took us on a house tour and showed us the freaking nursery?! The nursery was a lovely shade of pale blue-gray.

Like, I was just thrust into this weird ass situation and trying to figure out wtf was going on. I once went to NYC while in college and allowed myself to be pushed into a sketchy van on Canal street and driven around by Asian strangers with visible guns under their coats to buy knockoff designer bags and yet THIS was the most worried I'd been for my life.

I don't think this stems from trauma but who knows. I'm not touching that or asking about it. A coworker there did try to hint at it, I think, when they asked if Eli was their only child. She said that he was the only kid they wanted. I looked up these dolls and lifestyle on Instagram and it's not just people with trauma who like these dolls.

I told my sister about this experience last night and she laughed until she was crying and gasping for air because it is just like me to make a resolution to be more social and then put myself into such an odd social experience. I'm a homebody. The pandemic made me even worse. I'm not even saying my hobbies are better than hers, either! I'm really not making fun of her, I swear. When I get home from work, I toss on some trashy TV and spend my evenings doing jigsaw puzzles or diamond painting. Diamond painting...because I find the sounds of squishing the stones down very soothing & because I have no real artistic skill to really paint. I'm not some cool person.

OP, I really need to hear more about your experiences with the van full of Yakuza.

+1000! But also a little racist to point out “Asians.” Would she have said “a bunch of white guys”? Nevertheless your readership demands more on this!

There are no "white guys" selling on Canal street. It's in Chinatown.

[Anonymous]

Wow, she has a husband and he held the doll!

I wonder what she would have done if you asked her to bring her son to the office to meet everyone.

I wish you could have taken pictures to post here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP.

Some questions I saw:
-Our department is made up of 6 people. Coworker has been with us since mid-November. She's a fun person & I've been out after work to have drinks with her and others in our dept. NO ONE KNEW about her son. We work 3 days in office/2 days at home. I'm telling you, the photo of her son on her desk looks legit like a real baby.

-Only 4 of us came to the party from our department. There was 8 people total the whole time and two neighbors of hers stopped by during halftime to see the show. Her husband was one of the people there. They don't seem weird if that makes sense. They seem like perfectly normal people but the way some people think of themselves as a Dog Mom, she's a Doll Mom? The husband held the baby but overall, it seems like it's more of her thing.

-Also, wtf else was I supposed to say when she took us on a house tour and showed us the freaking nursery?! The nursery was a lovely shade of pale blue-gray.

Like, I was just thrust into this weird ass situation and trying to figure out wtf was going on. I once went to NYC while in college and allowed myself to be pushed into a sketchy van on Canal street and driven around by Asian strangers with visible guns under their coats to buy knockoff designer bags and yet THIS was the most worried I'd been for my life.

I don't think this stems from trauma but who knows. I'm not touching that or asking about it. A coworker there did try to hint at it, I think, when they asked if Eli was their only child. She said that he was the only kid they wanted. I looked up these dolls and lifestyle on Instagram and it's not just people with trauma who like these dolls.

I told my sister about this experience last night and she laughed until she was crying and gasping for air because it is just like me to make a resolution to be more social and then put myself into such an odd social experience. I'm a homebody. The pandemic made me even worse. I'm not even saying my hobbies are better than hers, either! I'm really not making fun of her, I swear. When I get home from work, I toss on some trashy TV and spend my evenings doing jigsaw puzzles or diamond painting. Diamond painting...because I find the sounds of squishing the stones down very soothing & because I have no real artistic skill to really paint. I'm not some cool person.

OP, I really need to hear more about your experiences with the van full of Yakuza.

+1000! But also a little racist to point out “Asians.” Would she have said “a bunch of white guys”? Nevertheless your readership demands more on this!

Asian here. I think it's a legit description for the story.

[Anonymous]

She is either mentally ill or had a traumatic experience. When I read your post, I thought the baby was probably real and died and that is why she has a nursery and doll baby. Sounds really sad and not something to laugh about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP.

Some questions I saw:
-Our department is made up of 6 people. Coworker has been with us since mid-November. She's a fun person & I've been out after work to have drinks with her and others in our dept. NO ONE KNEW about her son. We work 3 days in office/2 days at home. I'm telling you, the photo of her son on her desk looks legit like a real baby.

-Only 4 of us came to the party from our department. There was 8 people total the whole time and two neighbors of hers stopped by during halftime to see the show. Her husband was one of the people there. They don't seem weird if that makes sense. They seem like perfectly normal people but the way some people think of themselves as a Dog Mom, she's a Doll Mom? The husband held the baby but overall, it seems like it's more of her thing.

-Also, wtf else was I supposed to say when she took us on a house tour and showed us the freaking nursery?! The nursery was a lovely shade of pale blue-gray.

Like, I was just thrust into this weird ass situation and trying to figure out wtf was going on. I once went to NYC while in college and allowed myself to be pushed into a sketchy van on Canal street and driven around by Asian strangers with visible guns under their coats to buy knockoff designer bags and yet THIS was the most worried I'd been for my life.

I don't think this stems from trauma but who knows. I'm not touching that or asking about it. A coworker there did try to hint at it, I think, when they asked if Eli was their only child. She said that he was the only kid they wanted. I looked up these dolls and lifestyle on Instagram and it's not just people with trauma who like these dolls.

I told my sister about this experience last night and she laughed until she was crying and gasping for air because it is just like me to make a resolution to be more social and then put myself into such an odd social experience. I'm a homebody. The pandemic made me even worse. I'm not even saying my hobbies are better than hers, either! I'm really not making fun of her, I swear. When I get home from work, I toss on some trashy TV and spend my evenings doing jigsaw puzzles or diamond painting. Diamond painting...because I find the sounds of squishing the stones down very soothing & because I have no real artistic skill to really paint. I'm not some cool person.

OP, I really need to hear more about your experiences with the van full of Yakuza.

+1000! But also a little racist to point out “Asians.” Would she have said “a bunch of white guys”? Nevertheless your readership demands more on this!

Do you know where canal street is? Back then, Chinatown owned the knock off designer market. Stop looking for racism in everything.

[Anonymous]

Did everyone go along with it? Did anyone call it a doll?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:(Warning I have had a few drinks)

It was at a new coworkers house. My New Years resolution was to be more social and I regret it SO MUCH.

This woman…omg…I can’t even. She has an adorable picture of her son on her desk and talks about him and he’s FAKE!!!

He’s one of those creepy real life baby dolls!! I spent 5 hrs of my life being social with a woman who has a nursery for a doll. A Doll!

Things I said tonight: he really is such a good baby. Uh, sure I can hold him. I like the colors of the nursery, very soothing.

She doesn’t want real kids. But to her he’s her real kid. I have so much to unpack and I need to find a new job because I’m not going to be able to deal wi the this trauma drama.

Don’t socialize with coworkers guys. Just don’t.

Thanks for the chuckle - I would be way more traumatized by an middle aged male colleague with life size doll spouse … there are many of them according to one documentary I saw. They act like they are totally in love with the custom made dolls, dress them, name them, take them for car rides and sit them at the dining table when they eat.

Now after thinking about it - I see what you mean - It is so sad …

But if these dolls fulfill some deep human need in them, then so be it… there are much worse things they could be doing …

At first I totally thought she was talking about some 30 yr old boomerang child who lived in a nursery and dressed like those middle aged men in baby clothes. So confused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In today’s society, OP, you are supposed to react to this situation by being:

- sensitive, understanding, and supportive.

We are normalizing mental illness and destroying resilience.

If she is mentally ill, OP did the right the thing. He's not a psychiatrist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She is either mentally ill or had a traumatic experience. When I read your post, I thought the baby was probably real and died and that is why she has a nursery and doll baby. Sounds really sad and not something to laugh about.

I agree with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is destined to be a DCUM classic - The Super Bowl Real Fake Baby thread

except its clearly a troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This isn’t something to make fun of, OP. You are cruel and mean.

I don’t think OP is laughing at the coworker. Two things can be true — the coworker is mentally ill and/or suffering trauma, which is sad. But I can also see the humor in a homebody finally venturing out of her comfort zone following 2 years of a pandemic and ending up in a situation like this. Life is complicated.

[Anonymous]

Well, if OP is a troll, I hope she'll get back on and tell us about her weird 3-way with boy band members.

[Anonymous]

I think it's slightly better than the idiots who have pet monkeys they dress in human clothes and treat like babies. That's animal abuse imo, and the monkeys grow up to be angry, strong, sexually mature adult monkeys. They they're caged, they kill their owners, it they wind up in a sanctuary unable to function in normal chimpanzee society.

[Anonymous]

Now this is the kid you take to a late dinner at Ruth’s Chris on NYE!

Also, I have a cousin who paints those dolls. She “introduces them to the world” on FB and then sells them for thousands. They look incredibly real and are 1000000% terrifying.