Potluck is Indian-themed

[Anonymous]

Weird potluck. Unless you suspect the host is providing some protein like meat, I would eat beforehand.
-Indian American

[Anonymous]

bring a dessert.

[Anonymous]

Wine. Lots of wine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Perhaps a distraction, but: are people who say this is silly reacting to the potluck or the Indian? I would be surprised to find a dinner party was unexpectedly potluck (though I enjoy potlucks), but if I were doing a theme potluck, Indian would be one of the first things I considered. Am I weird? I assume most of my friends who cook, cook Indian sometimes! (I’m ethnically Ashkenazi, as are most of my cookingest friends.) Doesn’t everyone have cumin, coriander, turmeric, and cayenne on hand? Or do I exist in a weird foodie bubble?

I am the person who said it was absurd. I think, first of all, inviting people over and then telling them it’s potluck after they RSVP is obnoxious. I am not opposed to potluck, but it should be stated in advance.

But if you are doing potluck, either there is discussion about what various people want to bring, and the groups decides together, or it’s literally potluck. People bring what they like. My family likes to do get together and all bring something, and we do coordinate. With covid we always meet at the place with the best backyard, and of course it wouldn’t be fair to say that person has to provide all the meals. But if we do a theme we agree on it together and if someone doesn’t want to cook we provide that person with a task that doesn’t require them to go out and learn a new skill.

[Anonymous]

That’s kind of strange. Feel free to cancel nicely. But if you want to go, it wouldn’t be hard to pick up some pappadum or something. Or… ask host if there’s a particularly easy dish you could bring since you’re not familiar with Indian cooking?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perhaps a distraction, but: are people who say this is silly reacting to the potluck or the Indian? I would be surprised to find a dinner party was unexpectedly potluck (though I enjoy potlucks), but if I were doing a theme potluck, Indian would be one of the first things I considered. Am I weird? I assume most of my friends who cook, cook Indian sometimes! (I’m ethnically Ashkenazi, as are most of my cookingest friends.) Doesn’t everyone have cumin, coriander, turmeric, and cayenne on hand? Or do I exist in a weird foodie bubble?

I am the person who said it was absurd. I think, first of all, inviting people over and then telling them it’s potluck after they RSVP is obnoxious. I am not opposed to potluck, but it should be stated in advance.

But if you are doing potluck, either there is discussion about what various people want to bring, and the groups decides together, or it’s literally potluck. People bring what they like. My family likes to do get together and all bring something, and we do coordinate. With covid we always meet at the place with the best backyard, and of course it wouldn’t be fair to say that person has to provide all the meals. But if we do a theme we agree on it together and if someone doesn’t want to cook we provide that person with a task that doesn’t require them to go out and learn a new skill.

I’m another person who thinks the Indian part is strange to spring on people. Personally I’d be pleasantly surprised and yes I’d probably have to buy some spices, but I’m also open to cooking and trying lots of new foods. But to say a potluck is strictly Indian and assign specific kinds of dishes is pretty weird. Indian inspired might be better? And I could see lots of people not being interested in the Indian potluck — MIL would hate it, I know people with wicked reflux, etc., and if they RSVPd before being told it was potluck and Indian, they’d feel like they had to go but not eat anything but naan and rice.

[Anonymous]

What to make?

Your regrets that you won't be there.

[Anonymous]

Is it a cookbook club? Otherwise, I can’t see imposing this or any other specific cuisine on people. And I’m South Asian.

[Anonymous]

Tell her it sounds fun. That you guys don’t usually cook Indian, could she share a yummy recipe that is not too complicated?

[Anonymous]

You barely know the hosts, your DH knows them from years ago - these aren't your besties or people you are around so much it'd be awkward to skip - why are you going again? Just send your regrets. If you already RSVPed yes and then got the assignment, frankly I'd change it to NO with no explanations - like not even the polite oh something came up, we re thought re covid etc. I'd literally just go with - sorry can't make it, have fun!

[Anonymous]

This sounds like your DH’s problem

[Anonymous]

Decline. I'm very turned off by people hosting expecting others to host their party in reality. "We will provide naan and rice" makes them sound like they're 23 and looking to party with, "I have soda water, coke, sprite, and juice; you bring the booze!" As a PP said, if you host you need to be prepared for people to bring nothing but a bottle of wine where you can still feed them.

[Anonymous]

Yeah as an Indian-American this is super weird to me. I’ve never done a forced potluck at home, and would certainly not ask a guest to bring food the first time they come over! Potlucks IMO are for intimate gatherings, say the same 4-5 families who meet every month or so. One person is really good at making biriyani so they make that every time. Or one person live next to a bakery so that’s their standard contribution. But the host should always provide the bulk of the meal, with these as extras.

[Anonymous]

Are you sure the hosts didn’t mean they would make some meat dishes and everyone else bring a side? I don’t like potlucks because while I cook a lot, I never know if other people will like what I make. And sometimes multiple people bring potatoes and no one brings veggies etc. I love Indian food but whenever I make it at home, it doesn’t taste great, even when I use a jarred sauce. I find it a very difficult quinine to master and almost always get takeout. Assuming you still want to go to this party with rude hosts you barely know, I would definitely bring takeout, in the containers or in your own container, whichever is easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gene Weingarten, is that you, OP?

Lol