8 dates. Nothing
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| So I've been "seeing" this guy. We hit it off amazingly though the chemistry element is questionable. We have both expressed an interest in kissing but he has yet to make a move and I'm not comfortable making one. We are both coming out of long marriages. Is this a bad sign? Should I be patient or is the "it" factor just not there? |
Anonymous
|
The "it" factor just isn't there.
For either one of you. No kissing after eight whole dates is never a good thing. Sounds to me as if you are both too comfortable in the friend zone which means you are probably better off as friends. Hope this helps! 
|
Anonymous
+100 couldn't agree more |
Anonymous
|
How important is sex to you?
My brother does not really like physical intimacy and is married to a woman that feels the same way. They have 2 young kids and had sex only for procreation. I'm not sure that they will do it again but are very happy togther. Different strokes. |
Anonymous
|
Jump him. I wouldn't be OK with this, but physical intimacy is important. If things are otherwise interesting to you and you want to continue dating, make some moves and see how it goes.
It's so individual. I do think it's fishy that after 8 dates there's no action, but it could be any number of things. Coming out of long relationships and dating again is tough and I don't think people know what the rules are. Some people are going to err on the side of being super conservative. Maybe he doesn't want to ruin things by pushing. In any case, it's time to get it on. |
Anonymous
| Something's wrong here, OP. I think you know that. |
Anonymous
| You should just make a move. The worst that happens is you realize you really don't have chemistry-and then at least you know and can move on. And, your ex will no longer be the last person you kissed! |
Anonymous
|
How old are you?
|
Anonymous
|
Are you texting each other? Maybe set up plans f the next date but tell him you expect at least a kiss at the end!
Maybe he is afraid you will think he just wants sex Give him a big hint you are ready for more physical contact |
Anonymous
That sounds awesome. |
Anonymous
| OP here. He said he wants to kiss but feels shy. The problem is I feel shy too. But after 8 dates, I want someone to grab me and kiss regardless of how awkward it is. |
Anonymous
How do you know? I could never talk about my sex life with my siblings, more so if I was that way. |
Anonymous
He sounds a bit wimpy. But nevertheless, I'm sure he's a great guy. You need to take matters into your own hands if you really like him. Then you'll really know if you have chemistry. If you don't, then move on. Basically my advice: grab him and kiss him passionately next time you see him. You can do it. |
Anonymous
| OP, I suspect that he's coming out of a long sexless marriage and I also suspect that he has low testosterone. |
Anonymous
| It's possible he has performance anxiety - perhaps related to his marriage. Maybe his ex wouldn't kiss him, or told him he was a bad kisser. You may need to make the first move and give him time to "warm up", in the sense that he might be awkward and stiff at first. |