Why do special ed teachers.therapists seem to condescend to the students, parents?

[Anonymous]

I've met a handful of truly dedicated and talented teachers, but most seem to keep the bar so low that students will never accomplish much. They have little ambition for the kids. They were giving my child preschool work last year, and were miffed when I complained about it (he's at a 3rd-th grade reading level, and pre-algebra math level)

And I walked by one SpecEd teacher's room yesterday and overheard her scream...."These parents! I don't need any more of "these" parents! "These" parents are the problem.

[Anonymous]

Ooh yeah...

I spent 5 years trying to explain that my child was gifted AND learning disabled, and needed to be challenged within the bounds of his disabilities, to no avail. That combo is the hardest scenario, as an educator who doesn't have much time with your kid, to understand and plan for. As a parent, I KNOW my child. But these people don't, and I hate to say it, but if they don't have a certain level of intelligence themselves, all their care and professional dedication will only go so far.

I battled during my son's 5th grade year to have the SPED teacher recommend him for a gifted and LD program in middle school, as he had been waitlisted for the magnet. We spent thousands in private evaluations to prove our point, which makes me sad because so many families can't afford this and are left at the mercy of a very imperfect system.

[Anonymous]

Um, I don't know because I've never had a bad experience though I have clicked better with some than others. Are you just unlucky or am I lucky? Who knows.

So I'd say because people suck everywhere in every profession.

[Anonymous]

Hmmm. I have had mostly well-meaning speced teachers to deal with, but some are much more talented than others. I have dealt with a handlful of condescending STs or OTs, but I usually politely call them on their bullshit. I had a ST who clashed with my son, but my son had a great relationship with the mainstream teacher. She tried tro pull him during a class party and he melted down-nothing aggressive, but crying and refusing to go. Teacher said he was fine before that. ST called me to say she had serious concerns about his emotional regulation. I called a meeting with teacher, ST, principal, school counselor, etc and that shut her up.

[Anonymous]

Best special ed teacher our DC has had has LDs herself - such a difference. Most special ed teachers lack that personal experience and that can create situations like the OP described. The other part of the mix, I think, is that most special ed teachers themselves face the limitations of the system, because most districts aren't providing students with evidence-based curricula and methods (and teachers with training in those methods). Many parents, over time, become far more knowledgeable about their child's disability/disabilities than even "experts" in the school system (most of us don't set out to end up like this but the system requires you to do so to effectively advocate) -- and that's really difficult on both ends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Um, I don't know because I've never had a bad experience though I have clicked better with some than others. Are you just unlucky or am I lucky? Who knows.

So I'd say because people suck everywhere in every profession.

This. It's ridiculous to make vast generalizations based on limited experience, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Um, I don't know because I've never had a bad experience though I have clicked better with some than others. Are you just unlucky or am I lucky? Who knows.

So I'd say because people suck everywhere in every profession.

This. It's ridiculous to make vast generalizations based on limited experience, OP.

I've been at this quite awhile. I've dealt with a lot of "professionals" over the past 15 years. And yes, many of them have very low expectations of SN kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Best special ed teacher our DC has had has LDs herself - such a difference. Most special ed teachers lack that personal experience and that can create situations like the OP described. The other part of the mix, I think, is that most special ed teachers themselves face the limitations of the system, because most districts aren't providing students with evidence-based curricula and methods (and teachers with training in those methods). Many parents, over time, become far more knowledgeable about their child's disability/disabilities than even "experts" in the school system (most of us don't set out to end up like this but the system requires you to do so to effectively advocate) -- and that's really difficult on both ends.

+ a zillion

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Um, I don't know because I've never had a bad experience though I have clicked better with some than others. Are you just unlucky or am I lucky? Who knows.

So I'd say because people suck everywhere in every profession.

This. It's ridiculous to make vast generalizations based on limited experience, OP.

I've been at this quite awhile. I've dealt with a lot of "professionals" over the past 15 years. And yes, many of them have very low expectations of SN kids.

Right, you = n of 1--that's limited experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Um, I don't know because I've never had a bad experience though I have clicked better with some than others. Are you just unlucky or am I lucky? Who knows.

So I'd say because people suck everywhere in every profession.

This. It's ridiculous to make vast generalizations based on limited experience, OP.

I've been at this quite awhile. I've dealt with a lot of "professionals" over the past 15 years. And yes, many of them have very low expectations of SN kids.

Right, you = n of 1--that's limited experience.

She's not alone. Most parents become experts of their kids, and understanding of others' needs as well. Which means that unless the SPED has LDs herself, or SN kids, she will perhaps not have the best approach. And then, sometimes SPED teachers with SN kids want to lump every kid they meet with their own kids! So there's never a set rule, except this one:
Many sped teachers don't get it.

[Anonymous]

The SLP is terrible at our school. Despite documented concerns for years, she denies any speech issues and says its attention. After several evaluations and years of therapy, she is the only one commenting this. Our special ed teacher seems great but most I have met are not and most general ed teachers because they don't know each disorder generally lump all SN kids together and assume the worst vs. the best. Many don't like parents who are involved and advocate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The SLP is terrible at our school. Despite documented concerns for years, she denies any speech issues and says its attention. After several evaluations and years of therapy, she is the only one commenting this. Our special ed teacher seems great but most I have met are not and most general ed teachers because they don't know each disorder generally lump all SN kids together and assume the worst vs. the best. Many don't like parents who are involved and advocate.

Yes. I've found most of them have very little training -- I know more than they do.

[Anonymous]

They learn that in the college and clinical programs, sadly.
I've seen kids go away after having great enthusiasm for my disabled son (who probably inspired them to study special Ed in the first place) and they come back with the condescending attitude to what they now see as 'low functioning kids'. They are a scourge to be avoided in favor of the kids who get better quickly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The SLP is terrible at our school. Despite documented concerns for years, she denies any speech issues and says its attention. After several evaluations and years of therapy, she is the only one commenting this. Our special ed teacher seems great but most I have met are not and most general ed teachers because they don't know each disorder generally lump all SN kids together and assume the worst vs. the best. Many don't like parents who are involved and advocate.

Somehow a lot of SLP's, despite not being the brightest bulb on the porch, think that they know EVERYTHING. They become Pediatrician,neurologist and psychiatrist all in one.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the PP that said there are good and bad in every profession. However, realize that all Special Educators, School Psychologists, SLPs and others who work with your child do not have the same qualifications or background. For example, a Masters in Special Education is relatively a new degree and concepts in teaching have changed dramatically with new research and findings. All kids are not one size fits all but teachers and staff who do not stay current in their field or gather more than just the bare minimum to qualify them for their position will have trouble excelling in their profession.

Parents are an easy scapegoat and excuse for everything that ails the child. Parenting a child with Special Needs is a long road. My advice, become tough skinned, view such comments as OP posted as ignorance, ask many questions of the staff to learn their qualifications and philosophies, and educate and try to teach your child ways they can educate the staff as to their specific needs including ways they learn the best. You will still encounter boobs who refuse to try things a different way. Keep persevering and realize you also will come across good staff who will be valuable for your child's achievements and overcoming obstacles. Work with the good, persevere through the bad and view them as life lessons on how to deal with different types of people.