Help DD navigate the bus stop

[Anonymous]

So, I have a kindergartener and she is riding the bus to school. Week One was fabulous. Today, I got 'I don't want to go to school.' But I really think it revolves around the bus stop. She is fine at school, loves her teacher, etc. There are about 12 kids at the stop and most of them live in the 3-4 houses next to each other. So they are all friends and hang out. My DD knows a couple of these kids and has played with them off and on. They are nice to her, but they are nicest when DD has something they want to play with. Once they get a better offer, they drop her like a hot potato. There is only one other kindergartener but she has two siblings also at the bus stop. This morning, I watched DD try to integrate with this group and they don't even look her direction, even the kids she knows! She talks and no one responds. I've tried to help her, by trying to get the kids to talk, but most of them look at me like I have three heads. Ugh! My DH is so much better at this than me, but he is already gone by this time of the morning. This part of parenting sucks, and I'm steeling myself for the I don't want to go to school routine all week.

Anyone have advice or something I can do to try and ease this transition (for her and for me!)

[Anonymous]

Am I reading correctly that your DD has two siblings at the bus stop? I would 100% task my oldest (or the other girl if you have one) with making sure my 5 year-old had a good bus stop experience.

[Anonymous]

Have a play date with the other K-er to try to build that friendship..or maybe invite the whole family over for a barbecue so the older kids get to know her more too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I reading correctly that your DD has two siblings at the bus stop? I would 100% task my oldest (or the other girl if you have one) with making sure my 5 year-old had a good bus stop experience.

No, the other kindergartner has two siblings.

OP, are there other parents at the bus stop?

[Anonymous]

OP here. Sorry for the confusion. My DD is an only. The other K'er has two siblings.

There are other parents at the bus stop, yes. I've met a couple of them.

[Anonymous]

Drop her off later. Like only a few minutes before the bus comes. Then there isn't time to socialize .

[Anonymous]

Yes, PP that is an option. She is really excited to go to school though, and wants to get out there.

[Anonymous]

Why does she have to "navigate" the bus stop at all? It's one tiny aspect of her day. If it's not socially fulfilling, so be it. You wait there for the bus, and then you board and go to school.

Good grief, Mama.

[Anonymous]

Trying not to make a big deal of it, PP. And in front of her, I'm smiling and all "Have a Great Day!" But she wants to be part of the group, and it's hard to sit back and watch her being excluded.

That's all.

[Anonymous]

OP,
This may be more than you need but in our neighborhood we have four bus stops.
Depending on which direction you walk from our house, the nearest couple are only 20-40 steps different.
Can you try the next nearest stop?

[Anonymous]

Give it time, OP. It's the second week. She'll find a way to navigate it on her own.

[Anonymous]

It may not be fixable. My son has never been able to make friends on the bus route, and has never liked taking the bus. He's fine once he is at school and with friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP,
This may be more than you need but in our neighborhood we have four bus stops.
Depending on which direction you walk from our house, the nearest couple are only 20-40 steps different.
Can you try the next nearest stop?

I agree with this PP. Pick a different stop. We have three within a short distance from our house. DD did not like one stop because some of the boys were to rough. So, we picked a different one. No big deal.

[Anonymous]

Agree with the others to try other bus stops. Or, just hold hands with her and have her join you in talking to the other parents. This is totally normal for kindergartners, and even first graders at our bus stop. My second grader is very clingy to me at the bus stop, even though she is very close friends with one of the girls there. She'd rather hang out with me than play with the other kids. No big deal. We just have special mommy and me time until the bus comes.

[Anonymous]

You should talk to the other parents for excluding your DD. That is not nice. Or just pick her up and hold her until the bus comes - I did that all of kindergarten.