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My job requires me to do some computer work from home in the evenings and weekends- usually just a few minutes, sometimes up to an hour or two. I absolutely hate being interrupted during this- I lose my train of thought, have to start all over, end up forgetting things, etc. What would have taken 20 minutes ends up taking an hour.
However, DH interrupts me constantly while I'm working, and it's never really important. He'll be watching tv and mention something about politics or some athlete and expect me to respond. Or he's upset over something I said/did and wants to talk about it. If I tell him I do want to talk but would like to wait until I'm done working, he gets upset and demands to talk right then and there. Is expecting to not be interrupted while I'm working unreasonable? I would never call him up at work and demand to talk about something I was upset over. |
| I think you need to rework your job situation so it's not cutting into your personal time. |
| Just go into another room with the door closed when you need to work. Simple. |
| It sounds like you're working in the same room where he's watching tv. You need to be in a dedicated space. |
| Agree with 18:47. |
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Try pomodoros. Have you heard of them? 25 min of focus. 5 min break. Let DH know you'll be opening the door during a break. Other than that it's closed door, because you are focusing. Every 3 or 4 "pomodoros" is a 30 minute break. However you set it up.
Try the free app "power focus." |
What? Her DH need to grow up. OP - go into another room. |
Yep, agree. I work from home exclusively and everywhere we've lived, I've had a corner of one room (not the room where the TV is) as my work space. For my own sanity, I'm never at that desk off the clock (no personal web surfing time or anything) so it's very much just the work space. DH understands that when I'm at my desk I'm working so he doesn't come chat to me unless I let him know I'm free first. |
| If you're in a small apartment and your desk is near the tv, out headphones on to signal "door closed." |
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Is it's possible to just drive to the office for a while to get things done?
Or Tell you husband at the beginning of the day that you need to have some quiet time until you get this project done. |
+1 So many people in this area are married to their jobs it's all about one more email. Just touching up this project etc etc , and they have no real time left for their spouse. Then they post here about not knowing their spouse and feeling distance or planning their second and third marriage and wanting to get that right. Do it right the first time. Your boss isn't going to be by your bedside when you are ill. You can't make love to your reports. 20 minutes here and an hour there adds up, it all adds up to time you are not using to nourish your relationship with your spouse. Make the changes you need. Turn off the work phone and go hold hands with your spouse. |
| Just tell him to shut up while you're working. Why is this difficult? |
| It's the same as if you were at your workplace and some rando comes up to talk to you or chat at the water cooler. Be as civil to your DH as you would be to a coworker. |
| Holy sh*t. DH interrupts you with his talking while you are working at home in the evening? Are you kidding me? Thank you for posting and asking for advice -- but this sounds like a BS problem to me. Like -- "I can't find anywhere to wash my Porsche." Just F-ing work at Starbucks or Barnes & Noble or whatever. Let us get back to real problems -- like cheating or Autism or bankruptcy. |
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Many people view telecommuting a lesser form of work since it is sometimes more flexible work and/or it can be done in the comfort of ones own home vs. a "real" office.
It looks like boundaries need to be put into place stat. Lock your door when working & instruct your husband to please not interrupt except for urgent matters. Ask him to please give your job as much respect as he would for any other person. Tell him you really need his full support + compliance in order for you to be a success in your own job! |