The view of a black girl in private school

[Anonymous]

A black girls perspective of her PS in Europe http://www.blackballad.co.uk/what-ive-learnt-as-a-black-girl-at-private-school/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=newsfeed

[Anonymous]

How does this relate to a black girls experience in private school in the US? What is the purpose of posting this article? Just for people to read?

[Anonymous]

Many points in the article remind me of when I went to private school in the US. I was just thinking about the hair touching. I went to a predominantly black elementary school and rarely saw anyone white but it never occurred to me when I switched to a predominately white private school to try touch someone's hair that was different and ask lots of questions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does this relate to a black girls experience in private school in the US? What is the purpose of posting this article? Just for people to read?

Not OP, but I thought it was interesting. Not everything has to be about the US. Black people can have experiences in other countries too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does this relate to a black girls experience in private school in the US? What is the purpose of posting this article? Just for people to read?

If you read the article and had to ask yourself this question understand that you are part of the problem and not the solution. Had she not said this was in the UK I would have definitely believed it to be in the US. I know my fair share of Black women who went to elite schools right here in the US who experienced the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How does this relate to a black girls experience in private school in the US? What is the purpose of posting this article? Just for people to read?

If you read the article and had to ask yourself this question understand that you are part of the problem and not the solution. Had she not said this was in the UK I would have definitely believed it to be in the US. I know my fair share of Black women who went to elite schools right here in the US who experienced the same.

+1

[Anonymous]

I was one of fewer than 10 total black students at my all girls' prep. Despite the pretty horrid social experience, I chose a similar educational setting for one of my daughters. I gained fluency in UMC/UC white American culture there. Knowing the invisible rules helped me in college, grad school, and the work world. I do wish I'd chosen an HBCU though.

[Anonymous]

This was interesting to me to read. Because I went to a private school. And there was a black girl there named Tiwa.

That's where the similarities end, because Tiwa was a very bitter girl. She thought everything was a slight against her, and it was always because she was black. I didn't even remember this happening, but I ran into a teacher a couple of years after graduating who recounted a story: Tiwa asked me for a cough drop. I said no. She said, "It's because I'm black, isn't it?" and I said, "No, it's because my throat is red."

I haven't thought about that, or Tiwa for over a decade. I'm happy to read about another Tiwa, at another private school, who pushed through the difficulties of being one of the very few black girls to come out okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How does this relate to a black girls experience in private school in the US? What is the purpose of posting this article? Just for people to read?

If you read the article and had to ask yourself this question understand that you are part of the problem and not the solution. Had she not said this was in the UK I would have definitely believed it to be in the US. I know my fair share of Black women who went to elite schools right here in the US who experienced the same.

+1

+2

[Anonymous]

I went to a prep school in the Northeast and we had one black person in my grade. She was one of my best friends. She was nice, smart, funny, athletic and popular. We had so much fun. I never cared about the color of her skin nor was it anything anyone really thought about at our school. We lost touch during college, but I think about her often.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A black girls perspective of her PS in Europe http://www.blackballad.co.uk/what-ive-learnt-as-a-black-girl-at-private-school/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=newsfeed

Great article. Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many points in the article remind me of when I went to private school in the US. I was just thinking about the hair touching. I went to a predominantly black elementary school and rarely saw anyone white but it never occurred to me when I switched to a predominately white private school to try touch someone's hair that was different and ask lots of questions.

Do you know that white women touch each other's hair? In HS we would braid each other's hair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many points in the article remind me of when I went to private school in the US. I was just thinking about the hair touching. I went to a predominantly black elementary school and rarely saw anyone white but it never occurred to me when I switched to a predominately white private school to try touch someone's hair that was different and ask lots of questions.

Do you know that white women touch each other's hair? In HS we would braid each other's hair.

I have very rarely seen a white girl or woman walk up and touch or stroke another white woman's hair without permission. Totally different from braiding circles. And yes, I am a white woman who has braided lots of hair. I remember being really surprised when I braided one friend's hair; she had gorgeous thick, red hair, but it was horribly coarse. Not what I was expecting. But anyway, you always ask first; it's common sense. That goes for any body part, frankly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many points in the article remind me of when I went to private school in the US. I was just thinking about the hair touching. I went to a predominantly black elementary school and rarely saw anyone white but it never occurred to me when I switched to a predominately white private school to try touch someone's hair that was different and ask lots of questions.

Do you know that white women touch each other's hair? In HS we would braid each other's hair.

I have very rarely seen a white girl or woman walk up and touch or stroke another white woman's hair without permission. Totally different from braiding circles. And yes, I am a white woman who has braided lots of hair. I remember being really surprised when I braided one friend's hair; she had gorgeous thick, red hair, but it was horribly coarse. Not what I was expecting. But anyway, you always ask first; it's common sense. That goes for any body part, frankly.

Not in my circle of friends. Girls hold hands, braid hair, hug. It would not be odd in the senior lounge to walk up behind somebody and touch their hair.

Also we say "good hair" too for thick vs stringy hair, We also say "good skin"... For skin that tans vs freckly skin that burns.

I ask because my best friend grew up in a predominantly black neighborhood and school, I am her only close white friend and she comments about how odd it is to hear me on the phone talking about these things so casually it make her cringe to hear me say good skin... I said it in reference to my son who was at the beach with friends and I said ... Apply sunscreen ever hour you have the Irish skin, you will burn.

She was just surprised white people talk about skin tone.

Also, my H is a coach and he sometime touches the kids head, a black mom got upset, he's not a pet, don't touch his head, but then she saw my H did it to all the other kids and apologized later in the season.

Also we live in SS and the Hispanic moms always confuse me with the one other white mom on the soccer team, we look nothing alike, it happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many points in the article remind me of when I went to private school in the US. I was just thinking about the hair touching. I went to a predominantly black elementary school and rarely saw anyone white but it never occurred to me when I switched to a predominately white private school to try touch someone's hair that was different and ask lots of questions.

Do you know that white women touch each other's hair? In HS we would braid each other's hair.

I have very rarely seen a white girl or woman walk up and touch or stroke another white woman's hair without permission. Totally different from braiding circles. And yes, I am a white woman who has braided lots of hair. I remember being really surprised when I braided one friend's hair; she had gorgeous thick, red hair, but it was horribly coarse. Not what I was expecting. But anyway, you always ask first; it's common sense. That goes for any body part, frankly.

Not in my circle of friends. Girls hold hands, braid hair, hug. It would not be odd in the senior lounge to walk up behind somebody and touch their hair.

Also we say "good hair" too for thick vs stringy hair, We also say "good skin"... For skin that tans vs freckly skin that burns.

I ask because my best friend grew up in a predominantly black neighborhood and school, I am her only close white friend and she comments about how odd it is to hear me on the phone talking about these things so casually it make her cringe to hear me say good skin... I said it in reference to my son who was at the beach with friends and I said ... Apply sunscreen ever hour you have the Irish skin, you will burn.

She was just surprised white people talk about skin tone.

Also, my H is a coach and he sometime touches the kids head, a black mom got upset, he's not a pet, don't touch his head, but then she saw my H did it to all the other kids and apologized later in the season.

Also we live in SS and the Hispanic moms always confuse me with the one other white mom on the soccer team, we look nothing alike, it happens.

Maybe there is a regional US culture because even at my mostly white private schooling NY people did not do all that you described. I do think like the PP above mentioned that the rule of thumb is to respect personal space boundaries unless you know the person is okay with it. The hair things is very sensitive.