When is "enough's enough" for videogames at a sleepover?

[Anonymous]

My 11 year old DS wants to apparently only play videogames at sleepovers. No movies, board games. He and his friends will play some ping pong, chat a bit, eat dinner. But most of the time it is videogaming. I feel like it has become worse this year. How normal is this? If it is not entirely within normal range, what can I do, as a parent, to reign these boys in when I am hosting? They don't want to do anything else. They get "bored" with movies!

[Anonymous]

And should I allow more gaming in the morning when they wake up??

[Anonymous]

We usually have them turn off the gaming arpund 1:00AM

[Anonymous]

No idea. My kid actually hates going to sleepovers because of this. He thinks it's boring to play video games for hours on end and prefers to be physical. As of late, he's actively seeking friends who want to be active. It's a small group.

[Anonymous]

Give him a two hour limit and after that he needs to find something else to do. Yes, you have the "right" to parent the other child in your home and have them follow your rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give him a two hour limit and after that he needs to find something else to do. Yes, you have the "right" to parent the other child in your home and have them follow your rules.

+1,000,000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Give him a two hour limit and after that he needs to find something else to do. Yes, you have the "right" to parent the other child in your home and have them follow your rules.

+1,000,000

And another +1,000,000

It might help if you and your son come up with some other activity to start the evening, too. If it's warm and still light out, send them out into the yard to play until they're called in (no back-and-forth "We wanna come in now"). Get out water play stuff like sponges and buckets if it's hot. Son can set up Frisbee games (there are a lot of these online and your son might like researching them and setting them up; if the kids aren't good at throwing Frisbees, there are plenty of other outdoor games to find online). And so on. My brother and his friends used to love to cook stuff during sleepovers -- cookies (even from a mix or whatever), top your own pizza, popcorn with stuff to top it, etc. That keeps kids occupied for a while too.

If they can't go out, yeah, tolerate a little more gaming, but be very firm with your son before the party about how much time will be spent on gaming and then stick to that. If you want to reduce the whining when you say, "Game time is up," then be sure to give advance warnings (game time ends in 15 minutes, in five minutes...etc.) and also have something else for them as soon as the gaming ends, such as serving a snack at that point so they're distracted.

If they grouse that they're bored at YourSon's house and prefer sleepovers at HisFriend's house because they can game until their eyeballs fall out....Well, it's OK for you to be the mean parent who sets limits when they're at your home.

[Anonymous]

You could hire one of the companies that will come and do laser tag in your yard. We have been to a couple of parties that do this and it's always a hit.

[Anonymous]

Sadly this isn't a party. Just a friend sleeping over. I do not want to be the mean parent but not sure what else I can do at this point!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Give him a two hour limit and after that he needs to find something else to do. Yes, you have the "right" to parent the other child in your home and have them follow your rules.

+1,000,000

X infinity!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sadly this isn't a party. Just a friend sleeping over. I do not want to be the mean parent but not sure what else I can do at this point!

I can appreciate what you're saying, but it's not being a "mean" parent to set limitations. That's being a good parent.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the support!!

[Anonymous]

I don't see anything wrong with this, but my 11yo only goes to maybe 5 or 6 sleepovers a year so I don't feel like it's out of control.

[Anonymous]

It is just sad that 11 year old cannot think of what else to do with each other. Well the rain isn't helping at all. But still. Most of the kids who come over do not play board games. I don't get this. We play board games as a family - Cataan, Ticket to Ride, etc - but I guess others do not? So the answer to "play a board game" is: "Larlo doesn't play board games." It is not out of control as my 11 year old doesn't do too many sleepovers either. But so sad that they do not know how to interact with each other without the device.

[Anonymous]

My son is 11 and if the other kid comes over and it is nice out, they usually go outside on their own with Nerf guns, etc. The next few hours, they play video games and I have them turn them off at 11am or earlier if one of the kids has something to do the next day and needs more sleep. When they wake up, they play video games and then eat breakfast. I don't want them wrestling or running around the house so once they are inside, there are only a few other options. Sometimes they will play with Legos but they usually have zero interest in board games.