I feel so hopeless at 27.

[Anonymous]

I am 27 and I have nothing but bad luck. I am in school ( good career) but work a horrible job ( nanny) where I dislike my employers. It seems ever job I like, I never get. I broke up with my narcissistic ex a couple months ago. It's hard to date because I've learned that I likely can't have children, which most people want ( me included). I come from a mental/verbal abusive family, so I don't have support from them. I have a good support system of friends but they also lead busy lives. I've also been suffering from a chronic health issue ( fibromyalgia) that leaves me with 24/7 pain all over my upper body. This has lead to anxiety issues.

I can't explain but no matter how positive I try to be, I'm always struck down with bad luck. I feel so alone and this has made me depressed. I know some will say this a " woah is me.." thing but it's not. I'm just feeling so hopeless and I don't know how to stop. Most 27 year olds I know are not going through what I am, which makes me even more lonely and worry something is wrong with me. I don't know how much longer I can live like this.

[Anonymous]

Are you in therapy?
Having a 3rd person really helps.
Have you thought about joining a fibromyalgia group? People who are going through are enormous support.

As for work, what is your field? Can you get a tech or entry level position with the classes you've taken this far?

[Anonymous]

My friend Maura adopted her baby son two weeks ago. My cousin Gina adopted a baby about six months ago. My friend Will didn't want kids and is happily married and they love the shit out of their dog.

You should not view your life as hopeless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you in therapy?
Having a 3rd person really helps.
Have you thought about joining a fibromyalgia group? People who are going through are enormous support.

As for work, what is your field? Can you get a tech or entry level position with the classes you've taken this far?

I've seen one therapist but I felt she didn't care about her job. I am not in a support group but I am on a few online boards.

Unfortunately I don't have experience in any other fields, or they don't allow the flexibility that I need with school. Minimum wage won't pay the bills. I'm in the medical field.

Has anyone ever gone through this phase in your life? How did you get out of it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you in therapy?
Having a 3rd person really helps.
Have you thought about joining a fibromyalgia group? People who are going through are enormous support.

As for work, what is your field? Can you get a tech or entry level position with the classes you've taken this far?

I've seen one therapist but I felt she didn't care about her job. I am not in a support group but I am on a few online boards.

Unfortunately I don't have experience in any other fields, or they don't allow the flexibility that I need with school. Minimum wage won't pay the bills. I'm in the medical field.

Has anyone ever gone through this phase in your life? How did you get out of it?

Finding a good therapist takes time and effort.
You need to get out of the house and talk to some people, maybe one of your online groups can turn into something in person.
You might need to adjust your expectations when it comes to living expenses.
If you are in the medical field you've probably taken enough classes to get a Research Assistant or Coordinator position. You might have to look harder, but it' possible.

You have to make an effort and do the real work, even if it's not easy or doesn't fit into your plan at first. You can't just write things off .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you in therapy?
Having a 3rd person really helps.
Have you thought about joining a fibromyalgia group? People who are going through are enormous support.

As for work, what is your field? Can you get a tech or entry level position with the classes you've taken this far?

I've seen one therapist but I felt she didn't care about her job. I am not in a support group but I am on a few online boards.

Unfortunately I don't have experience in any other fields, or they don't allow the flexibility that I need with school. Minimum wage won't pay the bills. I'm in the medical field.

Has anyone ever gone through this phase in your life? How did you get out of it?

Finding a good therapist takes time and effort.
You need to get out of the house and talk to some people, maybe one of your online groups can turn into something in person.

You might need to adjust your expectations when it comes to living expenses.
If you are in the medical field you've probably taken enough classes to get a Research Assistant or Coordinator position. You might have to look harder, but it' possible.

You have to make an effort and do the real work, even if it's not easy or doesn't fit into your plan at first. You can't just write things off .

I get what you're saying but I support myself, pay for school, and support my father ( very ill) on my salary. Minimum wage just won't work. I'm in Pharmacy, and there isn't anything to do without having a license. It's not even about my job, so much as my health, infertility, and just a sense of hopelessness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you in therapy?
Having a 3rd person really helps.
Have you thought about joining a fibromyalgia group? People who are going through are enormous support.

As for work, what is your field? Can you get a tech or entry level position with the classes you've taken this far?

I've seen one therapist but I felt she didn't care about her job. I am not in a support group but I am on a few online boards.

Unfortunately I don't have experience in any other fields, or they don't allow the flexibility that I need with school. Minimum wage won't pay the bills. I'm in the medical field.

Has anyone ever gone through this phase in your life? How did you get out of it?

Finding a good therapist takes time and effort.
You need to get out of the house and talk to some people, maybe one of your online groups can turn into something in person.

You might need to adjust your expectations when it comes to living expenses.
If you are in the medical field you've probably taken enough classes to get a Research Assistant or Coordinator position. You might have to look harder, but it' possible.

You have to make an effort and do the real work, even if it's not easy or doesn't fit into your plan at first. You can't just write things off .

I get what you're saying but I support myself, pay for school, and support my father ( very ill) on my salary. Minimum wage just won't work. I'm in Pharmacy, and there isn't anything to do without having a license. It's not even about my job, so much as my health, infertility, and just a sense of hopelessness.

Your father is probably eligible for benefits, look into those. If you post in another forum, maybe health they can give you ideas on the benefits you can get.

What your feeling can change, but it takes work, the first step will be finding a therapist that is a good fit for you.

I'm sure you've taken courses in chemistry and biology many companies hire asisstants or coordinators with just having completed a certain amount of classes.

I don't know what you consider minimum wage, but many of those positions start at $ 30 to $35,000. It also has the added benefit of looking good on your resume.

[Anonymous]

This is life. Learn to look outside of yourself and dedicate yourself to helping others/making others happy. You must control the impulse that says think of yourself/put yourself first. Cut the navel gazing out. It is the only way to find inner contentment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is life. Learn to look outside of yourself and dedicate yourself to helping others/making others happy. You must control the impulse that says think of yourself/put yourself first. Cut the navel gazing out. It is the only way to find inner contentment.

Nonsense!

Helping people is good, but not at the expense of your own mental health. It seems it's come to the point OP needs to look out for herself. She sounds very depressed and that isn't fixed by being more helpful.

[Anonymous]

late 20's can be a rough time, it feels like everyone is pairing off and starting families, or getting on in their careers, and you may feel a bit left behind. its a phase though, and once your friends are through it, and go through all the other life stuff, divorces, illnesses, accidents - you will re-connect with what you have in common. i was actually very glad to not marry until my mid 30's, because my dh is so much better suited to me than my 20's ex's were.

for the medical stuff, it sucks, no doubt. there are limitations on you that others do not have. but there is so much you can still do. you must focus on that. when we struggled with infertility, my husband and I started traveling around the world, something our friends with babies could not do. it was so amazing and such a gift.

i guess i'm saying, it gets better. its great that you found the courage to leave the narcissist. this actually bodes really well for your future, even if it feels painfully lonely now. you will be so grateful not to be stuck with that guy in a few years when you look back on your life.

if you can, take some time off and travel. even if its just a train ride across the country. i'm sure you can find another nanny job when fall comes around again. enjoy your freedom and you youth while you have it.

btw, after 5 years of infertility struggle we got pregnant. i don't regret at all the awesome trips i took when i was getting over feeling sorry for myself. you really don't know what life will bring you.

[Anonymous]

OP, you do not know the problems other people have. Repeat: you do not know the problems other people have. If you are in school, you are bettering yourself. You have something to look forward to. Join some clubs, hike, take some risks. Your situation is not permanent, It could change tomorrow!

[Anonymous]

You have a classic case of severe depression OP.

Don't you dare feel guilty or responsible for how you feel. No one should apologize for a "Woe is me....." feeling.

It is impossible to simply snap out of it. Impossible.

You have a chemical imbalance within your system which is beyond your control.

Please get professionally evaluated by a physician so that you can be put on some anti-depressant medication that can help you.

You have many many good years left to live.
Don't waste any of them suffering from depression since there are so many treatment options at your disposal.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I felt hopeless at 27 as well. Try the book "Seven
Habits of Highly Effective People" and try to believe in yourself and i am pretty confident that you will be pleasantly surprised. Good luck

[Anonymous]

Ok op, you need to work through your anxiety and health problems and finishing school, before you should even be worrying about marriage and having children. Take care of yourself, work on yourself, and later a great relationship will follow.

[Anonymous]

Hi, there! I’m sorry to hear about your situation. Do you think it might be helpful if you speak to a counselor? I know that Focus on the Family has free licensed counselors that you can call at 1-800-A-FAMILY. My friend has spoken with one recently and they are great. I know they would love to help! I’ll be praying that God will provide the comfort, strength and guidance that you need at this time. Also, you might find these links useful: : http://bit.ly/1QqfUvc and http://bit.ly/21BDeRp. Hang in there!