Kids Eating Sabotaged by Grandparents

[Anonymous]

I try to feed my 8 and 6 year old healthy meals. I'm a health nut myself and limit junk. Problem is that my in-laws live nearby and are regularly feeding my kids garbage. It drives me crazy but I'm tired of fighting it. I always end up being the bad guy. Also I feel like because they give them so much junk, I don't have the opportunity to give my kids treats. At least a couple times a week they don't want dinner because grandma stuffed them full of cookies and ice cream.

DH said something and his mother got very defensive and upset so now he doesn't want to deal with it.

I'm almost at the point of not caring anymore. My son is more of the couch potato type so we really have to work at him being active and eating right. I don't gave the energy to fight this any longer.

Has anyone delay wi

[Anonymous]

I try to feed my 8 and 6 year old healthy meals. I'm a health nut myself and limit junk. Problem is that my in-laws live nearby and are regularly feeding my kids garbage. It drives me crazy but I'm tired of fighting it. I always end up being the bad guy. Also I feel like because they give them so much junk, I don't have the opportunity to give my kids treats. At least a couple times a week they don't want dinner because grandma stuffed them full of cookies and ice cream.

DH said something and his mother got very defensive and upset so now he doesn't want to deal with it.

I'm almost at the point of not caring anymore. My son is more of the couch potato type so we really have to work at him being active and eating right. I don't gave the energy to fight this any longer.

Has anyone delay with this. Am I being too uptight here? It's exhausting.

[Anonymous]

I don't deal with this because I don't have the grandparents watching them after school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't deal with this because I don't have the grandparents watching them after school.

+1 I think this is difficult as long as you need the grandparents for free labor so to speak.
They will not respect you. It's a power play or ignorance unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

How much junk do they feed them?

My inclination is to say, yes, you are being too uptight. Since you feed them healthy they are getting a great, well-rounded nutritional diet. So, what are you worried about? bad habits? cavities? weight gain?? Or are you more irked that she isn't doing as you ask?

I think it will be ok!

I would just let go. happiness comes when we let go!

[Anonymous]

Isn't that the point of grandparents?

[Anonymous]

I let my parents and ILs spoil our kids, but they aren't local so its not very often. If this is happening 3+ times a week, you may need to rethink your child care plan. Have you actually talked to her about it? I think it's one thing to give a kid some graham crackers or a cookie with an afternoon snack, but if they are so full they don't eat dinner, that seems like a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Isn't that the point of grandparents?

Not the OP, but no. I hate the idea that anyone's role is to spoil kids, or be the disciplinarian, etc. My kids grandparents role is to be two more people in their lives who are stable and responsible and love them and give them a biological tie to their family, etc. It's not to giggle behind my back while sneaking them cookies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Isn't that the point of grandparents?

Not the OP, but no. I hate the idea that anyone's role is to spoil kids, or be the disciplinarian, etc. My kids grandparents role is to be two more people in their lives who are stable and responsible and love them and give them a biological tie to their family, etc. It's not to giggle behind my back while sneaking them cookies.

Remove the stick and you will find more joy in life.

[Anonymous]

My SIL is the one who loves to spoil my kids. I am ok with it because they still follow my rules at home.

I also find that my kids are very happy to go to her house, if I ever need to leave them with her because her pantry is a kid's dream.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Isn't that the point of grandparents?

Not the OP, but no. I hate the idea that anyone's role is to spoil kids, or be the disciplinarian, etc. My kids grandparents role is to be two more people in their lives who are stable and responsible and love them and give them a biological tie to their family, etc. It's not to giggle behind my back while sneaking them cookies.

Remove the stick and you will find more joy in life.

I have plenty of joy in my life. As do my kids, as do their grandparents. My kids just don't get stuffed with junk food.

[Anonymous]

Nope. Not uptight at all. You don't really have much of a choice though other than to limit the time they spend there.

[Anonymous]

Do the grandparents watch the kids after school? Everyday? If so, this would bother me, OP but stuffing kids full of junk is a pet peeve of mine. I'd be tempted to look the other way if this was happening once a month, but it sounds like this is happening several times a week.

This sort of overindulging is exactly the reason the risk of being overweight and obese goes up when grandparents become childcare providers for their grandchildren. It's a really tough situation because the relationship is so special and you are lucky they are so close and want to be involved.

Share your concerns with your MIL. If your doctor or dentist is at all concerned about your children, share that, too. If they are not open to a conversation, there will only be so much you can do. You can try suggesting some suitable, but still fun alternatives (fruit kabobs or banana "ice cream"), encourage bonding through "doing stuff" together. You may want to rethink your childcare strategy so that when the kids do see the grandparents, they can have treats and you don't have to worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Stop having in-laws spend so much time with kids. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How much junk do they feed them?

My inclination is to say, yes, you are being too uptight. Since you feed them healthy they are getting a great, well-rounded nutritional diet. So, what are you worried about? bad habits? cavities? weight gain?? Or are you more irked that she isn't doing as you ask?

I think it will be ok!

I would just let go. happiness comes when we let go!

you are so wise. really! how do I start thinking like you?