How long until you were attracted to someone?

[Anonymous]

DH and I are separating after 30 years. Objectively he is not attractive. But he is to me. He's 50, a large over the pants belly, and balding. I still love the man that he is.

Yesterday I was at a kids party and I looked around the room at the dads. There was not one person in the room that I thought was remotely attractive. I know I'm still in the early stages and in no way ready to date, but how long did it take for you to be attracted to someone else?

[Anonymous]

There are not many attractive in good shape dads in their 50s.

[Anonymous]

I was a lot younger and married for much less time when I got divorced (age 34) and I was attracted to other people pretty much almost immediately after separating. Heck, I was attracted to people while I was married, but because I was married, connecting with those guys wasn't an option. My marriage was boring and I realized long before we separated that my ex husband wasn't the man for me, so I may differ from you in that I wasn't in love with him for quite awhile before separating. Everyone has their own timetable and there's no way to predict when you'll feel ready to have those kinds of feelings again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I are separating after 30 years. Objectively he is not attractive. But he is to me. He's 50, a large over the pants belly, and balding. I still love the man that he is.

Yesterday I was at a kids party and I looked around the room at the dads. There was not one person in the room that I thought was remotely attractive. I know I'm still in the early stages and in no way ready to date, but how long did it take for you to be attracted to someone else?

How old are you OP? If you are close to 50 you be beginning menopause and you will have no attraction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I are separating after 30 years. Objectively he is not attractive. But he is to me. He's 50, a large over the pants belly, and balding. I still love the man that he is.

Yesterday I was at a kids party and I looked around the room at the dads. There was not one person in the room that I thought was remotely attractive. I know I'm still in the early stages and in no way ready to date, but how long did it take for you to be attracted to someone else?

How old are you OP? If you are close to 50 you be beginning menopause and you will have no attraction.

I'm 48. And yes, I'm peri meno. I actually got my period last month for the first time in 6 months. I was sad-- so close to being done and now the clock resets . So menopause also affects attraction?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I are separating after 30 years. Objectively he is not attractive. But he is to me. He's 50, a large over the pants belly, and balding. I still love the man that he is.

Yesterday I was at a kids party and I looked around the room at the dads. There was not one person in the room that I thought was remotely attractive. I know I'm still in the early stages and in no way ready to date, but how long did it take for you to be attracted to someone else?

How old are you OP? If you are close to 50 you be beginning menopause and you will have no attraction.

I'm 48. And yes, I'm peri meno. I actually got my period last month for the first time in 6 months. I was sad-- so close to being done and now the clock resets . So menopause also affects attraction?

I have friends in perimenopause who are still attracted to men, so I wouldn't worry about that.
I wouldn't try to force it either. Did you find men attractive before you were married? It stands to reason you will again, try not to pressure yourself during this difficult time.

[Anonymous]

You just need something new. Try a black man

[Anonymous]

If you still love your husband why are you separating?

[Anonymous]

You need to worry about whether or not YOU are attractive, since not many women your age are attractive either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you still love your husband why are you separating?

Not my choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I are separating after 30 years. Objectively he is not attractive. But he is to me. He's 50, a large over the pants belly, and balding. I still love the man that he is.

Yesterday I was at a kids party and I looked around the room at the dads. There was not one person in the room that I thought was remotely attractive. I know I'm still in the early stages and in no way ready to date, but how long did it take for you to be attracted to someone else?

How old are you OP? If you are close to 50 you be beginning menopause and you will have no attraction.

I'm 48. And yes, I'm peri meno. I actually got my period last month for the first time in 6 months. I was sad-- so close to being done and now the clock resets . So menopause also affects attraction?

I have friends in perimenopause who are still attracted to men, so I wouldn't worry about that.
I wouldn't try to force it either. Did you find men attractive before you were married? It stands to reason you will again, try not to pressure yourself during this difficult time.

I was 18 when I met DH. Boys were cute. But an 18-20 yr old boy is a different attraction than a 50 year old man.

[Anonymous]

Eeeew 50 is old and wrinkly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eeeew 50 is old and wrinkly.

Well, maybe you'll check out of this planet before you're 50 so you won't get old and wrinkly. Goodness gracious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eeeew 50 is old and wrinkly.

OP here--out of curiosity, how old are you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I was 18 when I met DH. Boys were cute. But an 18-20 yr old boy is a different attraction than a 50 year old man.

I'm a lot happier and getting laid a lot more at 50 than I was at 18-20.

Sure, I can't jerk off eight times a day and have it shoot five feet across the room (fact: I measured it once) any more, but now I don't have to jerk off because I have a wife. I'll take age, matrimony, and independence over youth, teenage bachelorhood, and dependence on parents any day.