Asking in-laws to change diaper...

[Anonymous]

If you were to go visiting to in-laws and your FIL was holding your BIL's newborn baby but passed the baby to you (a newly married woman with no kids) to change a diaper full of diahorrea, then ask you to feed afterwards, would you find it sexist? Would you do it esp. If one of the parents (BIL) was there just playing with his phone?

[Anonymous]

Yes I would find that sexist and yes I'd hand the baby off to a parent.

I have kids of my own and I'd still hand it off to the baby's parent.

[Anonymous]

Nope No way. It's just sexist.

Feeding the baby might be fun and I might say yes to that.

[Anonymous]

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Sounds like something out of Mad Men

[Anonymous]

Yes it's sexist, though I probably wouldn't say anything to FIL. I would definitely hand the baby to BIL in your situation. I would probably find a parent or MIL if it were only me and FIL in the room. If I were alone in the house with FIL and the baby, though, I would probably change and feed the baby.

Relatedly, I stayed with my parents for a couple of weeks when DD was 2 m.o. I wanted to take a shower, and I left dD with my Dad (mom was not at home). He asked me nervously what he should do if she needed a diaper change. I reminded him that he raised 3 children and, if my mom is to believed, was fairly involved in basic things like feeding and diapering. And I also assured him that diaper technology hasn't changed substantially since the 70s and 80s, so I felt confident that a highly skilled medical specialist like himself could probably figure it out. He did end up changing a diaper while I was in the shower, and we all lived to tell the story

[Anonymous]

I'm not changing a dirty diaper if a parent is present, and I would never just sit there while someone else changed my kid's diaper.

[Anonymous]

Yes sexist and I'd made a joke out of it to embarrass FIL

[Anonymous]

"Hahaha, no thanks! Hey, BIL, here's your bundle of joy, have at it!"

[Anonymous]

"Wow, Bob, I think you meant to pass this hot potato to his daddy, not his auntie. One of the best things about not having kids is not changing diapers!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Wow, Bob, I think you meant to pass this hot potato to his daddy, not his auntie. One of the best things about not having kids is not changing diapers!"

Amen. And I agree with PP that I am NOT changing diapers if a parent is in the room unless they are legitimately busy doing something else they can't take a break from. Playing on your phone? No way buddy, it's butt wiping time.

[Anonymous]

Nope, wouldn't do it, and I'd probably say something like, "Oops, not mine!" I only change my own child's gross diapers. Feeding isn't gross of course, but I also find it odd FIL would assume any woman knows how to bottle feed - I don't.

Totally sexist. Your BIL is FIL's son?

[Anonymous]

Assuming a parent wasn't there, I'd do it for the baby's sake. Depending on my relationship with those involved, I'd either push back against FIL to ask why he can't do it or I would tell BIL/SIL that FIL can't be left alone with the baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assuming a parent wasn't there, I'd do it for the baby's sake. Depending on my relationship with those involved, I'd either push back against FIL to ask why he can't do it or I would tell BIL/SIL that FIL can't be left alone with the baby.

There was a parent there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would find that sexist and yes I'd hand the baby off to a parent.

I have kids of my own and I'd still hand it off to the baby's parent.

Um this. My sister and I are very close and if I had my hands full she would suck it up and change a poopy diaper, or if I was sick or something, but if I was playing on my phone- here you go mom!