Is there a way I can convince him I'm not frivolous?
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Anonymous
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DH is constantly harping on how much I spend on Amazon and at Walmart. The thing is, it's basics for the house...toilet paper, laundry detergent. I've asked him to see down with me and check every order, and he says it's not necessary, but continues to harp on it.
What's my next step? |
Anonymous
| Hide the tp and detergent, stop washing his clothes. Tell him you couldn't find these items for free and they're too expensive to buy. |
Anonymous
| Complain to him every time you buy something how expensive it was. "Oh paper towels are so expensive these days, $x for 6 rolls. And I have to buy new packs every single week! It used to be only $X for 8 rolls." |
Anonymous
Agreed. Don't shop for a month, see how he likes it. |
Anonymous
He checks the checking account daily, that's where he's seeing all the purchases. He just thinks I'm blowing $60 at a time on random crap on Amazon. |
Anonymous
| Send him the shopping list and tell him he needs to purchase everything himself if he won't stop harping on it. |
Anonymous
| Ask him what he thinks you two should budget each month for papertowels, tp, etc. List out the basics that you are purchasing. |
Anonymous
| Or ask him to do the shopping one month. |
Anonymous
Forward him your order confirmations from Amazon so that he can see you're buying things that are not frivolous. |
Anonymous
She already said that he doesnt want to review the receipts. Which honestly is pretty annoying considering he is complaining. I'd go with not shopping for a month or having him do it. |
Anonymous
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just let yourself run out of stuff (napkins, toiletries and detergent) and start cutting those napkins into smaller squares and see what he says. Oh, I'm just reducing our spending.
Then again, I think you probably do the laundry? Then, there's no way he will even know there's detergent. Just do his laundry without detergent. What do you buy anyways on a daily basis? Are there diapers you need to buy? That's usually a lot of money. Cut the spending on junk food, that's what I do. Do you buy beer/wine or bread? Just go a week without that and say, I'm cutting spending so I decided to cut out beer, hot dogs and bread or cut out the things he likes. |
Anonymous
| I would say, the cost of everything has gone up a lot compared to just 3 years ago. |
Anonymous
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Oh God OP, he sounds like my father. Did you marry your dad? Don't you have any rights? Are you somewhat younger than him? Are you a particular religion or ethnic culture that demands women be subservient to men?
Have him buy everything with you. Forget about doing it online. Drag him to the store every time you shop. He should then get tired of it or have him clip coupons or find them online. He can do the work if he doesn't like how you do it. But, I worry you don't seem to think you have any rights in the matter. |
Anonymous
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And is he all squeaky clean himself? I used to have the same problem with DH. I usually buy the household stuff and children's stuff, and he is responsible for the mortgage and energy bills, etc. Well, I found out that he had made several late payments because he's not that well organized, so now if he dares to complain that I spend too much on essential items like toilet paper, I point out to him ACIDLY that he has actually WASTED our money on late fees, whereas I get stuff to wipe our bums with 
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Anonymous
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I think more is going on here. He probably thinks you're being frivolous in other areas too.
My best friend and her dh are struggling on one income and she is a SAHM. She says she doesn't spend much money, but everything is name brand. The paper towels, toilet paper, dish soap, Ziploc bags, fancy shampoos, you name it. She doesn't coupon either. Are your purchases like hers? |