Single dad with dd getting first period

[Anonymous]

So, it finally happened. I need a little reassurance...

DD will be 13 in a month. Got her first period at school yesterday.

I think I did all the appropriate things ahead of time -- had a trusted female adult talk with her several months ago about what to expect, allowed her to carry a little purse with pads just in case (at her request -- although that subsided after a while). Yesterday she called from school (no supplies) so I went to get her. Came home (she has supplies here), let her rest. Am allowing her to stay home from school today since I gather managing flow for the first time may be a little tricky (and I don't think she feels so hot, which may or may not having anything to do with it).

I totally didn't make a big deal about it or anything -- that just felt weird and inappropriate. Was matter-of-fact and no big deal. Asked if she needed anything and gave her a few cuddles on the couch before going back into the office to work. She did homework and watched some TV. I reminded her that she could call the adult if there was anything she felt like talking about with a woman rather than Dad.

This is right, yes? Anything more to do? Obviously, staying home from school won't become a regular thing. Will one day learning to manage this on a personal level be enough for her or should I be prepared for her to stay home on Friday, too?

[Anonymous]

She shouldn't have to stay home anymore.

You did great

[Anonymous]

Hi Op

If I were you I would talk to your daughter how she feels before you decide that she goes to school. She might feel fine and want to go , but she might want to stay home. Obviously, she can't do this every month but I would cut her some slack the first time.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

You did great! The only thing I suggest is maybe next time if she isn't feeling so hot offer her some advil. It can really help with cramps and the yucky feeling in general.

[Anonymous]

Also I know it's early, but always try and keep an open line of communication with your daughter about birth control. You don't want her to be afraid to ask you for help getting an appointment or prescription.

[Anonymous]

Does the school have a nurse? If not, who is her "go to" person at the school.

1. The nurse's office should have emergency supplies.
2. I would encourage her to keep a spare of underwear and pants in her locker, just in case. You are right, it can be tricky trying to learn how to manage it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does the school have a nurse? If not, who is her "go to" person at the school.

1. The nurse's office should have emergency supplies.
2. I would encourage her to keep a spare of underwear and pants in her locker, just in case. You are right, it can be tricky trying to learn how to manage it.

I agree with the above... DD (aged 11) always has an emergency pack hidden away in a small space in her backpack with the necessary supplies... as with young kids periods are not always regular at first.

[Anonymous]

Maybe give her some Advil for the cramps.

You are a good dad.

[Anonymous]

You did great! I didn't want to discuss anything with my parents so they bought me a book and tons of supplies. I loved seeing all the different types of pads, liners and tampons!

[Anonymous]

Agree you handled this well. I'm the OP from a recent thread about my daughter (soon to be 13) just getting her first period too.

Depending on your kid, having a trusted adult female to talk to about this (or even an older friend) is really important. My daughter had a lot of questions/observations about what was going on and it was super helpful being able to answer based on first hand experience. Yes, I had bad cramps too -- take advil/aleve right away and stay with it all the way through. Yes your flow can slow down at night but that doesn't mean you're done. No the blood doesn't look the same as when you have a cut.

Also, it would be good if you had an emergency supply kit in your car or bag or wherever so that if she gets it unexpectedly when she's with you, you're prepared.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Will one day learning to manage this on a personal level be enough for her or should I be prepared for her to stay home on Friday, too?

I would play it by ear if you can. Everyone's body handles it differently and she may feel worse tomorrow than today. Some girls suffer from cramps, diarrhea, headaches, etc. (once she's adjusted to having periods though, if she's having severe enough pain to miss school she should see a doc). Extra undies in a ziploc, a few pads of different absorbencies, and some motrin (if it's allowed in school) are a must for the backpack. At any rate you're doing everything right and being very gracious.

[Anonymous]

Why are you single?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are you single?

Widower.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are you single?

So none of your business!

OP you did and are doing great! Kudos.

[Anonymous]

You did great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and better than my mother ever did. I knew my mom would make a thing out of it and it would be mortifying so I didn't tell her for a few months. (I have two sisters so used their supplies.) Then when I finally did tell her, she started crying and went into the "now you're a woman" speech. it was so embarrassing at that age. you handled it SOOOOOOOOOOOO much better. And it was really kind of you to let her stay home a day.