Not passionate with BF of 2 years
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Anonymous
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Me and my BF of 2 years have not had intercourse yet. I'm a virgin and want to wait until after marriage. He has known this going in and has always supported me and never pushed for more. We hookup and have oral sex but haven't done more yet. In the beginning I was charmed and pleased that he was such a gentleman and did not care about having sex with me. Now I almost feel neglected. We hook up and make out but our sessions are not hot and heavy. Of course, I've never experienced anything else so I don't even know what to compare it to or if we are normal. I love my BF and I know he loves me so much. I just wish I could see him be lustful towards me want him to pin me down and ravage me. He never makes a move to do more and always says he is waiting for me. Its hard for me to be in the mood to do more when I don't feel desired.
Are we screwed?Can we recover? We have an excellent partnership but are so lackluster in the bedroom. If we start having sex, will we get the fire back? |
Anonymous
| Life isn't 50 Shades of Grey love. |
Anonymous
| You want to have your cake and eat it, too. |
Anonymous
Also classic woman who wants a man to bring all the energy to bed while she princess pillows |
Anonymous
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But you said you don't want to have sex. Are you saying you want to see that he wants you, and is struggling with not being able to have sex with you?
It's hard to say. Was he ever passionate/lustful toward you? |
Anonymous
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Two things:
1. Yes, it is common that the passion lessens over time. It doesn't mean you don't love the person, don't want them, don't enjoy sex, etc., but the intensity does go down a bit. 2. You want two contradictory things, and that's not really fair to him. You want him to want to be overcome with desire for you, going so far as to suggest you want him to push for more (and that perhaps you'd give it to him if he did, but that seems to completely conflict with a commitment to waiting), but you've also been very clear with him that he needs to restrain himself because you're not going to have actual intercourse until after you are married. You need to figure out what you want here and be clear about it in your behavior and your expectations for him. |
Anonymous
No, it's actually more interesting. |
Anonymous
| I really don't see a difference between doing oral and actual sex. Why not just start that up? |
Anonymous
LOL, I went to college with a guy who had oral and anal sex with any girl who was willing, but wouldn't have actual PIV so he could still claim to be a virgin. It was a total farce. |
Anonymous
| Troll! |
Anonymous
| You're not being fair to him. Either you want sex or you don't. Or do you just enjoy giving him blue balls? |
Anonymous
Same with some of the girls in my Catholic high school. When it got out that some were doing anal, the school had the gyno father of a classmate come in and tell us how bad anal was. Talk about awkward. |
Anonymous
yeah wtf is a virgin doing on DCUM |
Anonymous
| Pathetic troll. |
Anonymous
| OP, if you are real, PLEASE get some experience before you get married. This is foolish beyond belief. |