WWYD regifted -- really just a vent

[Anonymous]

My SIL's presents for the kids arrived today. For my daughter there was an admittedly very lovely beading kit -- that i have her daughter two years ago. (It is the exact one I gave her -- SIL did not happen to buy the same version). SIL has super high paying job (at least 4x what my husband and I make combined, likely more). I wish I could just laugh it off or be grateful but I can't. I feel, well, mostly sad but pissed off as well. So I am bitching anonymously here. Thank you for letting me get it out. (Why even send presents late when they are so lame? Book for son also appears regifted but I can't identify that one with 100 percent certainty)

[Anonymous]

She clearly forgot where it came from. It's an easy mistake.

I'm not sure why you consider it a "lame" gift. If it's lame now, it was lame when you gave it to her daughter as well.

[Anonymous]

"Thanks for the great beading set, Jane! Great minds think alike - it's the same one I gave Jane Junior a couple of years ago!" It sounds nice, and is open to interpretation, but will set off alarm bells that she needs to rethink her (very rude and thoughtless) regifting practices if she can't even remember whose gifts she's regifting to whom.

[Anonymous]

If you read what I wrote I never called it lame. Yes she obviously forgot. She only has two nieces to buy for. I am just disappointed and also irritated because there is no reason for her to be pulling random things out of her closet for a present for her niece who she professes to adore who she only buys presents for once a year. Especially when she is super wealthy and flashy about it to boot.

[Anonymous]

MY SIL did the same thing, and with something very similar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you read what I wrote I never called it lame. Yes she obviously forgot. She only has two nieces to buy for. I am just disappointed and also irritated because there is no reason for her to be pulling random things out of her closet for a present for her niece who she professes to adore who she only buys presents for once a year. Especially when she is super wealthy and flashy about it to boot.

NP... you said "(Why even send presents late when they are so lame?...)

I understood you to be calling the bead set lame as well. And I too wondered if it was lame when you sent it to her daughter.

[Anonymous]

Thank you 20:06. That encapsulates my feelings exactly

[Anonymous]

"Hey, sis, I wonder if we both have so much going on and our kids have so much stuff that it makes sense to stop with the gift exchange? If it's not fun buying presents any longer, why bother, right?"

[Anonymous]

She sounds sort of inconsiderate or disorganized and you sound petty and envious.

[Anonymous]

That's really crappy, OP.
You are correct, there is no excuse. The only explanation is that people these days are very self-centered. Your SIL really takes the cake for not even remembering where the beading set came from. Surprising that she couldn't just go on Amazon and send something from there.
Agree that you should say something like "Oh, I guess your Suzy really loved that same beading set that we gave her last year. I'd love to see some of the things she made! Any pointers for her cousin in using the set?".
She probably still won't care but you will have called her out without actually saying anything mean.
(I'm a little passive aggressive if you didn't notice).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's really crappy, OP.
You are correct, there is no excuse. The only explanation is that people these days are very self-centered. Your SIL really takes the cake for not even remembering where the beading set came from. Surprising that she couldn't just go on Amazon and send something from there.
Agree that you should say something like "Oh, I guess your Suzy really loved that same beading set that we gave her last year. I'd love to see some of the things she made! Any pointers for her cousin in using the set?".
She probably still won't care but you will have called her out without actually saying anything mean.
(I'm a little passive aggressive if you didn't notice).

I like this.

While regifting isn't really such a terrible thing to do, realistically, if her own kid didn't put it to use, the SIL obviously doesn't think it's some great toy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's really crappy, OP.
You are correct, there is no excuse. The only explanation is that people these days are very self-centered. Your SIL really takes the cake for not even remembering where the beading set came from. Surprising that she couldn't just go on Amazon and send something from there.
Agree that you should say something like "Oh, I guess your Suzy really loved that same beading set that we gave her last year. I'd love to see some of the things she made! Any pointers for her cousin in using the set?".
She probably still won't care but you will have called her out without actually saying anything mean.
(I'm a little passive aggressive if you didn't notice).

Passive-aggressive is for cowards.

Say what you mean, or don't say anything, OP. Don't play games.

[Anonymous]

Who cares about the gift?
Unless someone gives her porn, I could not care less what my kid gifts, I just concentrate on her saying thanks and moving on.
Grow up OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Hey, sis, I wonder if we both have so much going on and our kids have so much stuff that it makes sense to stop with the gift exchange? If it's not fun buying presents any longer, why bother, right?"

+1000

[Anonymous]

My aunt used to do the same thing all the time - give me gifts my mom gave her girls. Whatever. When she realized, she started buying stuff she knew I'd like.