Newlyweds: What is your routine?

[Anonymous]

My dh and I have been married for 1 year. Usually we get home together, either grab takeout and eat it in the car or come home and quickly stuff our faces with it. We then change into PJs. He will go pour himself a drink. I will make myself tea.

We then sit on the couch and casually watch tv and chat or watch netflix together. Some nights he plays video games and I'm watching tv or zoning out.

What about you guys?

[Anonymous]

I've been married for 11 years now and have two little kids and this sounds a little sad to me. You never cook? You don't go to happy hours with friends? You don't host dinner parties? You don't go to cafes and peoplewatch? You don't go for hikes or go to the Shenandoah or go apple picking?

I mean, Netflix is great. But the last time I did want you guys do every day I was nursing a newborn and stuck in a chair for several weeks. You're presumably young, don't you want to have experiences you'll remember when you're old and invalid and can only sit around watching TV?

Eh, this is probably a troll post, though, so I guess it doesn't really matter what you respond.

[Anonymous]

We've been married for about a year and a half. I get home about 2 hours before him so I cook dinner and we eat pretty much as soon as he gets home (around 6:30). We clean up together, then I have school work to do for an hour or two, then we'll watch a show together and head to bed (around 11). This is 3-4 nights per week. Other nights one or both of us is working late, out with friends, or doing some kind of activity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been married for 11 years now and have two little kids and this sounds a little sad to me. You never cook? You don't go to happy hours with friends? You don't host dinner parties? You don't go to cafes and peoplewatch? You don't go for hikes or go to the Shenandoah or go apple picking?

I mean, Netflix is great. But the last time I did want you guys do every day I was nursing a newborn and stuck in a chair for several weeks. You're presumably young, don't you want to have experiences you'll remember when you're old and invalid and can only sit around watching TV?

Eh, this is probably a troll post, though, so I guess it doesn't really matter what you respond.

We're in our late twenties and work downtown and live in Vienna. DH usually works late, 7-8 and by the time we get home its 9-9:30pm. We don't have time for elaborate meals during the week day. Also, we don't usually have a lot of friends and living in Vienna and the commute means we are pretty solitary.

[Anonymous]

Don't you all have hobbies or friends? I think your routine sounds a little lazy to be honest...

DH and I have been married 4 years, but we're constantly on the go. We're meeting friends after work, cooking dinner, we have a hobby we go to 2x a week at night. We're always renovating our house after work and we do watch Netflix while we work. This time of year we spend a lot of time meeting friends downtown to do the Christmas things (see the tree, zoolights, holiday parties on Friday/Sat night).

My #1 thing for a happy marriage is to always have outside friends and not spend 100% of your time together. Because you burn out.

[Anonymous]

Cars aren't for eating. That's your biggest issue.

I have kids now but pre-kids, we would cook, or go out, or get take out, but eat at a real table and have a conversation. We also went to the gym after work several nights a week, but would eat at a table afterwards. Actually, even with kids, we still eat at a table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't you all have hobbies or friends? I think your routine sounds a little lazy to be honest...

DH and I have been married 4 years, but we're constantly on the go. We're meeting friends after work, cooking dinner, we have a hobby we go to 2x a week at night. We're always renovating our house after work and we do watch Netflix while we work. This time of year we spend a lot of time meeting friends downtown to do the Christmas things (see the tree, zoolights, holiday parties on Friday/Sat night).

My #1 thing for a happy marriage is to always have outside friends and not spend 100% of your time together. Because you burn out.

OP here. We don't have any friends at the moment. Also, we live in Vienna while everyone we know lives in Alrington, DC proper. I know our routine sucks. I wish we could shake it up! We're too young to feel like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been married for 11 years now and have two little kids and this sounds a little sad to me. You never cook? You don't go to happy hours with friends? You don't host dinner parties? You don't go to cafes and peoplewatch? You don't go for hikes or go to the Shenandoah or go apple picking?

I mean, Netflix is great. But the last time I did want you guys do every day I was nursing a newborn and stuck in a chair for several weeks. You're presumably young, don't you want to have experiences you'll remember when you're old and invalid and can only sit around watching TV?

Eh, this is probably a troll post, though, so I guess it doesn't really matter what you respond.

We're in our late twenties and work downtown and live in Vienna. DH usually works late, 7-8 and by the time we get home its 9-9:30pm. We don't have time for elaborate meals during the week day. Also, we don't usually have a lot of friends and living in Vienna and the commute means we are pretty solitary.

Do you like your life how it is now? I'd kill myself if I got home at 9pm every night. Seriously. You're just living to work at that point, with no time to actually have a life. Two hours of commuting? Can that even be right considering you claim to drive (Vienna from the district has gotta be more like a 40-minute drive at 7pm).

Move closer in. We lived in a divey but safe shitty apartment in Courthouse pre kids. It was so worth it to be home in 15 minutes. Then you can have time together to build a life. If you want kids, you'll probably want to move toward a lifestyle where you'll actually see them before 9:30pm, anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't you all have hobbies or friends? I think your routine sounds a little lazy to be honest...

DH and I have been married 4 years, but we're constantly on the go. We're meeting friends after work, cooking dinner, we have a hobby we go to 2x a week at night. We're always renovating our house after work and we do watch Netflix while we work. This time of year we spend a lot of time meeting friends downtown to do the Christmas things (see the tree, zoolights, holiday parties on Friday/Sat night).

My #1 thing for a happy marriage is to always have outside friends and not spend 100% of your time together. Because you burn out.

OP here. We don't have any friends at the moment. Also, we live in Vienna while everyone we know lives in Alrington, DC proper. I know our routine sucks. I wish we could shake it up! We're too young to feel like this.

PP here. We live in Reston (so further out) but still have lots of friends. You have to put in effort. I know lots of 20 somethings who live in Vienna. What about your neighbors?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't you all have hobbies or friends? I think your routine sounds a little lazy to be honest...

DH and I have been married 4 years, but we're constantly on the go. We're meeting friends after work, cooking dinner, we have a hobby we go to 2x a week at night. We're always renovating our house after work and we do watch Netflix while we work. This time of year we spend a lot of time meeting friends downtown to do the Christmas things (see the tree, zoolights, holiday parties on Friday/Sat night).

My #1 thing for a happy marriage is to always have outside friends and not spend 100% of your time together. Because you burn out.

OP here. We don't have any friends at the moment. Also, we live in Vienna while everyone we know lives in Alrington, DC proper. I know our routine sucks. I wish we could shake it up! We're too young to feel like this.

Move to Arlington or DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cars aren't for eating. That's your biggest issue.

I have kids now but pre-kids, we would cook, or go out, or get take out, but eat at a real table and have a conversation. We also went to the gym after work several nights a week, but would eat at a table afterwards. Actually, even with kids, we still eat at a table.

Yeah the car thing sounds like the easiest way to get fat quickly. And eating out so often isn't healthy. Even if you're eating healthy items, they still add extra butter, oil and salt that you wouldn't normally use.

[Anonymous]

When I'd been married for a year whoever got home first started cooking dinner. If DH was cooking I'd take the dog for a walk. If I was cooking he'd take her, and then he'd either play piano or go skateboard at the elementary school next door.

[Anonymous]

Gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been married for 11 years now and have two little kids and this sounds a little sad to me. You never cook? You don't go to happy hours with friends? You don't host dinner parties? You don't go to cafes and peoplewatch? You don't go for hikes or go to the Shenandoah or go apple picking?

I mean, Netflix is great. But the last time I did want you guys do every day I was nursing a newborn and stuck in a chair for several weeks. You're presumably young, don't you want to have experiences you'll remember when you're old and invalid and can only sit around watching TV?

Eh, this is probably a troll post, though, so I guess it doesn't really matter what you respond.

We're in our late twenties and work downtown and live in Vienna. DH usually works late, 7-8 and by the time we get home its 9-9:30pm. We don't have time for elaborate meals during the week day. Also, we don't usually have a lot of friends and living in Vienna and the commute means we are pretty solitary.

Do you like your life how it is now? I'd kill myself if I got home at 9pm every night. Seriously. You're just living to work at that point, with no time to actually have a life. Two hours of commuting? Can that even be right considering you claim to drive (Vienna from the district has gotta be more like a 40-minute drive at 7pm).

Move closer in. We lived in a divey but safe shitty apartment in Courthouse pre kids. It was so worth it to be home in 15 minutes. Then you can have time together to build a life. If you want kids, you'll probably want to move toward a lifestyle where you'll actually see them before 9:30pm, anyway.

I'm absolutely not happy with my life right now! I'm always depressed and feel like I'm missing out. This commute has made it hard for me to make or keep friends. I can leave work early 5 or 6 but i get a ride from my dh so I usually wind up waiting for him and leave work at 8.

It sucks.

[Anonymous]

Ahhhh, I love thinking about those days!!! We have been living together since we were 21 and started a family at 27.

We used to come home and I love cooking so we always ate something delicious. We alway had great jazz and blues music playing and would devour a bottle of wine each night. We somehow managed to have no problem staying up late and would catch up on sleep on thr weekends.

Sometimes at night we would run errands together. We had a shit shack that was a major project and we were often at Lowe's buying things and then doin repairs.

I really look back at those years with great memories.

Oh and yes, we also had an active social life....and loved going out to eat and drinking too much