VA MD DC Girls soccer - thoughts, opinions
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Anonymous
I think it means are there some highly skilled players showing up for training sessions with your kids team? |
Anonymous
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When practicing with another team in the Spring, do people usually tell their current coach? Assume it is not prohibited by league or club rules. I have always been of the mindset that any good coach would have their own kid practice with another team before they would consider switching their own kid to that team, so given that, it is really none of a current coach's business as to what a player does in their free time --- unless of course they start missing their current team's practices to train with the other team. That of course is totally unacceptable.
This has been our approach, but I always feel uncomfortable about it. If we were ever to inform the current coach, I see so many downsides with that approach that is always ruled out as an option. So, we just very privately attend a few practices with the other team on our own. I do not like it, but I do not see any other approach, and to do right by your player you have to do this in order to consider the other team. Do others agree? Has this approach ever backfired for anyone? It usually works out fine as long as the current coach doesn't find out, but there of course are a lot of cases where they do find out because all these coaches know one another and talk to one another between the various clubs. I understand that there sometimes is an unwritten rule that if players start showing up and practicing with another team, then that coach sends an FYI to the current coach as part of the unwritten rules of the Brotherhood of Coaches. It sucks, but I think you just have to accept that part and continue to practice with the other team as long as it doesn't overlap any commitment with your current team. If the current coach finds out and ask you about it, then of course you should be totally honest. Thoughts/opinions? A lot more going on on the girls leagues side this Spring, so I imagine this is going to be happening for quite a few players. |
Anonymous
No obligation to tell your DD's current coach anything. If you are missing some practices to train with a prospective new team and your current coach asks why you are missing practices then you and your DD have to decide whether to be honest with your current coach or not. I've seen it done both ways and I think that honesty is the better policy. |
Anonymous
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why is missing training for a team in this way totally unacceptable? unacceptable to whom? should we expect retaliation from an adult who is being paid to develop players? if there is retaliation, then i am not so sure children need to be in such a petty environment.
maybe the coach (and negative vibe parents) needs to continue with the training no differently than if a child was absent for other “more legitimate to you” reasons. |
Anonymous
| ^^ people do that, but a lot of travel soccer parents and players do feel that they should honor a commitment for the good of their larger team. That is why they even have you sign a contract so that you think about other things besides your immediate self-interest at any given point. It is probably best to try to practice with another team outside of your team's regular practice, but I know people do it and lie about it, which is even worse to involve your child in a lie. Some people are totally upfront and just tell the coach what they're doing, but then that player in sup often ping a slight price for the remainder of the season. Human nature a bit, there are good coaches who don't hold grudges. Guess it depends a bit on your team/club culture. |
Anonymous
| That reinforces that idea that many coaches get what they deserve if they retaliate, it's cyclical and sounds pretty poor coaching. |
Anonymous
Please never tell them anything. There I have warned you. After a year at a big well known club with a highly thought of coach. I would never tell them you are practicing with another team. I could see them demoting your DD to a lower team on the spot. Leaving you to pick up the broken pieces. Seriously, the coach will say it is temporary and we think she is having a proble with speed of play. Maybe she can work it out on the lower team. The YDP will just smile and back the coach. LOL |
Anonymous
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Why is it the business of any big club ........ with what you do on your free time???? so petty. A bunch of mini-Peps. Unless it is something like playing illegally for another team, then you can do whatever you want ...... these coaches think they own players. scare parents into loyal sheep afraid to ever experience a change from the same ol same ol.
tryout and practice anywhere you want on your time and dime |
Anonymous
| Insecure coaches retaliate, and thats a good enough reason to leave a club. Anytime a quality player from a top club practices with another team, the texts start pinging and everyone knows about it before the session is over. Hardly any secrets in soccer try outs. |
Anonymous
+1000 |
Anonymous
What age does that start? No one will care below what age? U12? |
Anonymous
It happened to my kid at the end of his U10 year. Crazy. Just makes you that much more confident in the decision to leave. We also had a few coaches that stayed in touch with us over the years and have remained mentors for my kid even after we left. They ended up leaving the Club as well. It's nutso--though. I actually saw a coach from our former club at the tryout and he was texting on his phone--I know reporting back. We were very professional about the whole thing. Always leave on good terms--but some adults act like children and think everything is about them. When you are paying thousands of dollars for something--shouldn't you comparison shop, check out the quality, etc??? It should be encouraged. |
Anonymous
It happened to my kid at the end of his U10 year. Crazy. Just makes you that much more confident in the decision to leave. We also had a few coaches that stayed in touch with us over the years and have remained mentors for my kid even after we left. They ended up leaving the Club as well. It's nutso--though. I actually saw a coach from our former club at the tryout and he was texting on his phone--I know reporting back. We were very professional about the whole thing. Always leave on good terms--but some adults act like children and think everything is about them. When you are paying thousands of dollars for something--shouldn't you comparison shop, check out the quality, etc??? It should be encouraged. |
Anonymous
It happened to my kid at the end of his U10 year. Crazy. Just makes you that much more confident in the decision to leave. We also had a few coaches that stayed in touch with us over the years and have remained mentors for my kid even after we left. They ended up leaving the Club as well. It's nutso--though. I actually saw a coach from our former club at the tryout and he was texting on his phone--I know reporting back. We were very professional about the whole thing. Always leave on good terms--but some adults act like children and think everything is about them. When you are paying thousands of dollars for something--shouldn't you comparison shop, check out the quality, etc??? It should be encouraged. |
Anonymous
Oh---and they also will check out other Club's websites--when they post photos from tryouts on their website or social media---the Clubs actively scan them to see if any of their current players are there. |