Summer swim brings out the crazy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On big teams a lot of younger kids could care less about A meets

Agree. When they are younger, there are just as many non-A kids as A kids. They all have a good time. It's about 13+ where the divide starts. The kids at A meets and all the adjacent extra meets spend hours and hours together. Of course they are a clique. The social dynamics of older kids also get more complicated. At our large higher division pool, most non-A meet teens just drop out.

I hazard to say older kids drop out of swim there are a multitude of reasons including other interests like other sports where there's a big summer season component (e.g., lacrosses, baseball), other camps. I don't know that i would pin the the reason why older kids drop out solely based on "oh, I'm not fast enough to swim in A meets".

Long time summer swim parent here. I don't know. The same names show up year after year for the A meet. You can watch them age through the team. If what you were saying was the main cause and it had zero to do with being in A meets, an equal proportion of the A kids would end up dropping out. Seems kind of notable that the A meet kids all stay and the B meet kids mostly drop out as teens.

It is what it is. It's a structure that creates 2 different experiences kids are having. What teenager is going to keep hanging around to spend a long evening at a B meet with a silly theme and go to some pep rallies. Most of them aren't. The B meet swimmers who stick around as teens on our team end up junior coaches. Which that makes sense to me. A paid job and leadership opportunity.

Do the same names appear at A meets year after year because those are the kids who do year round swim? While other kids do travel baseball, travel hockey, lacrosse, etc. Because that's what it seems like at our pool - and the older kids drop out because they're busy with other commitments rather than being disappointed in not going to B meets.

At the very strong pools there are plenty of kids doing year round swim who still don't make A meets. I don't think kids at any age drop out because they are disappointed about not going to B meets. I think they start to not feel part of the team and cliques form just because they are not there for a lot of meets. Some B meet kids have strong friendships and still keep on with it.

We have 54 club swimmers on our team and trust me - there are MANY of them that don’t make the A meets.

Right. The summer swim clique includes some swimmers who don’t do club swim. It’s all about the parents who are brown nosers and take over all the volunteer positions.

Oh yeah, those coveted volunteer positions that everyone fights over

Lemme guess, you are a family who thinks you shouldn’t have to volunteer like everyone else for some reason.

Lol. Getting volunteers is like pulling teeth. Which are the coveted positions? Are you one of the pools with table workers in the air conditioning??

I’m well aware. So are all the other parents. We don’t want to volunteer at meets and events with the snobby, immature, cliquey, gossipy, drama filled volunteer “leaders” who do take over the head positions. They do “covet” these positions (because they need a life and) because they want influence so their kids are favored or hired as coaches. They are on power trips. In my years of experience, normal parents don’t want to be around or volunteer with the crazy swim parents.

So you can't stand there and time because the other parents are gossipy? Sounds like you are making excuses.

I have actively volunteered on my kid's team for the last 10+ years. Here is another newsflash for you, if anything my kid gets worse treatment as a result because I have butted heads with the coach a few times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On big teams a lot of younger kids could care less about A meets

Agree. When they are younger, there are just as many non-A kids as A kids. They all have a good time. It's about 13+ where the divide starts. The kids at A meets and all the adjacent extra meets spend hours and hours together. Of course they are a clique. The social dynamics of older kids also get more complicated. At our large higher division pool, most non-A meet teens just drop out.

I hazard to say older kids drop out of swim there are a multitude of reasons including other interests like other sports where there's a big summer season component (e.g., lacrosses, baseball), other camps. I don't know that i would pin the the reason why older kids drop out solely based on "oh, I'm not fast enough to swim in A meets".

Long time summer swim parent here. I don't know. The same names show up year after year for the A meet. You can watch them age through the team. If what you were saying was the main cause and it had zero to do with being in A meets, an equal proportion of the A kids would end up dropping out. Seems kind of notable that the A meet kids all stay and the B meet kids mostly drop out as teens.

It is what it is. It's a structure that creates 2 different experiences kids are having. What teenager is going to keep hanging around to spend a long evening at a B meet with a silly theme and go to some pep rallies. Most of them aren't. The B meet swimmers who stick around as teens on our team end up junior coaches. Which that makes sense to me. A paid job and leadership opportunity.

Do the same names appear at A meets year after year because those are the kids who do year round swim? While other kids do travel baseball, travel hockey, lacrosse, etc. Because that's what it seems like at our pool - and the older kids drop out because they're busy with other commitments rather than being disappointed in not going to B meets.

At the very strong pools there are plenty of kids doing year round swim who still don't make A meets. I don't think kids at any age drop out because they are disappointed about not going to B meets. I think they start to not feel part of the team and cliques form just because they are not there for a lot of meets. Some B meet kids have strong friendships and still keep on with it.

We have 54 club swimmers on our team and trust me - there are MANY of them that don’t make the A meets.

Right. The summer swim clique includes some swimmers who don’t do club swim. It’s all about the parents who are brown nosers and take over all the volunteer positions.

Oh yeah, those coveted volunteer positions that everyone fights over

Lemme guess, you are a family who thinks you shouldn’t have to volunteer like everyone else for some reason.

Lol. Getting volunteers is like pulling teeth. Which are the coveted positions? Are you one of the pools with table workers in the air conditioning??

I’m well aware. So are all the other parents. We don’t want to volunteer at meets and events with the snobby, immature, cliquey, gossipy, drama filled volunteer “leaders” who do take over the head positions. They do “covet” these positions (because they need a life and) because they want influence so their kids are favored or hired as coaches. They are on power trips. In my years of experience, normal parents don’t want to be around or volunteer with the crazy swim parents.

Are you in the DMV? In all the ridiculousness that passes for summer swim in the DMV, this doesn’t sound even in the ballpark of ridiculousness that I’ve seen or heard.

Yes of course and yes there is summer swim drama that brings out the crazy. Check the title of this post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a Team Rep. I was asked to be one because I have an A meet swimmer. I did not feel like I could say no. I don’t mind doing it but I did not “covet” the job, angle to get it, or strategize about how to get it. I don’t consider myself to be part of any “clique” but if you are calling the volunteers who have gotten to know each other through doing these jobs a “clique,” well, okay, but I assure you that at our pool anybody who steps up to take these bigger volunteer roles is embraced and welcomed wholeheartedly to the so-called “clique.”

Really? There are plenty of A meet parents and other qualified parents for the role. Why were you asked and not them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a Team Rep. I was asked to be one because I have an A meet swimmer. I did not feel like I could say no. I don’t mind doing it but I did not “covet” the job, angle to get it, or strategize about how to get it. I don’t consider myself to be part of any “clique” but if you are calling the volunteers who have gotten to know each other through doing these jobs a “clique,” well, okay, but I assure you that at our pool anybody who steps up to take these bigger volunteer roles is embraced and welcomed wholeheartedly to the so-called “clique.”

Really? There are plenty of A meet parents and other qualified parents for the role. Why were you asked and not them?

Not the PP. But every team has its own dynamics that make “requirements” for team rep more than just having a kid who will consistently be in an A meet. Maybe it’s the parent’s ability to get along with others? Understanding of other volunteer roles? Ability to get others to help out? Good rapport with the coaches?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a Team Rep. I was asked to be one because I have an A meet swimmer. I did not feel like I could say no. I don’t mind doing it but I did not “covet” the job, angle to get it, or strategize about how to get it. I don’t consider myself to be part of any “clique” but if you are calling the volunteers who have gotten to know each other through doing these jobs a “clique,” well, okay, but I assure you that at our pool anybody who steps up to take these bigger volunteer roles is embraced and welcomed wholeheartedly to the so-called “clique.”

Really? There are plenty of A meet parents and other qualified parents for the role. Why were you asked and not them?

DP and also a Team Rep who was approached about taking the role and didn’t feel like they could say no. I know you all seem to think people are jumping up and yelling “pick me!” for the Team Rep position but in reality most people say no and want no part of that role. This is my 2nd and last year in the role and I cannot wait to just going back to regular volunteering at meets. And yes, I approached my replacement because they are an experienced swim parent who I also thought would feel like they couldn’t say no. Sorry friend!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a Team Rep. I was asked to be one because I have an A meet swimmer. I did not feel like I could say no. I don’t mind doing it but I did not “covet” the job, angle to get it, or strategize about how to get it. I don’t consider myself to be part of any “clique” but if you are calling the volunteers who have gotten to know each other through doing these jobs a “clique,” well, okay, but I assure you that at our pool anybody who steps up to take these bigger volunteer roles is embraced and welcomed wholeheartedly to the so-called “clique.”

Really? There are plenty of A meet parents and other qualified parents for the role. Why were you asked and not them?

Former team rep here. I think it’s hilarious that you think there are “plenty” of people to do that job. No one wants to do it. It’s a lot of work, much of it behind the scenes. There are very few people willing to take it on. I work full time and balancing the role with my job was intense. I’m so glad I did it, but I’m glad to have “retired”.

[Anonymous]

The idea that there are people who covet these jobs and fight over them is crazy. I’ve been asked to be team rep numerous times and said no, and I know that as a team we have had to beg people to take on the role. Our head timer and head official have been doing those jobs for years but I know they are both are desperately begging people to be willing to do them in future years because they have teenagers who will age out soon. We lost our head clerk of course to a graduating senior last year and every meet the team reps are sending out begging emails asking someone to step up to the job.

[Anonymous]

I am the PP and I don’t get why someone seems angry that I was asked to be a Team Rep. They probably did ask other people before they got around to me! I’m the sap that said yes. If you want the job so bad, just volunteer for it! You can have it! I also would be happy to go back to being a regular volunteer who just signs up for stuff!

[Anonymous]

Our pool had the opposite and the non-year round swimmers, and families whose kids barely swam dominated the pool and team and many of us left. It was poorly run, poorly organized, and they didn't even do half the meets. Those families took key positions to get free pool memberships and jobs for their kids.

Wait, swim team key volunteers get free pool memberships at your pool? Is that common?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Our pool had the opposite and the non-year round swimmers, and families whose kids barely swam dominated the pool and team and many of us left. It was poorly run, poorly organized, and they didn't even do half the meets. Those families took key positions to get free pool memberships and jobs for their kids.

Wait, swim team key volunteers get free pool memberships at your pool? Is that common?

Certainly not at our pool! If anything, I spent my own money on the team when I was a rep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Our pool had the opposite and the non-year round swimmers, and families whose kids barely swam dominated the pool and team and many of us left. It was poorly run, poorly organized, and they didn't even do half the meets. Those families took key positions to get free pool memberships and jobs for their kids.

Wait, swim team key volunteers get free pool memberships at your pool? Is that common?

Not sure if its common but yes... they also dominate other roles too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a Team Rep. I was asked to be one because I have an A meet swimmer. I did not feel like I could say no. I don’t mind doing it but I did not “covet” the job, angle to get it, or strategize about how to get it. I don’t consider myself to be part of any “clique” but if you are calling the volunteers who have gotten to know each other through doing these jobs a “clique,” well, okay, but I assure you that at our pool anybody who steps up to take these bigger volunteer roles is embraced and welcomed wholeheartedly to the so-called “clique.”

Really? There are plenty of A meet parents and other qualified parents for the role. Why were you asked and not them?

Former team rep here. I think it’s hilarious that you think there are “plenty” of people to do that job. No one wants to do it. It’s a lot of work, much of it behind the scenes. There are very few people willing to take it on. I work full time and balancing the role with my job was intense. I’m so glad I did it, but I’m glad to have “retired”.

lol! Yes to this! I was reading those other posts thinking wtf. No one wants that job at our pool. People only do it for a couple years bc it’s a lot of work.

No chance I could do it because one of my kids is involved in a year round activity that requires a crazy amount of volunteering. I totally understand what a thankless job being a team rep is. We do our family hours and then do our best to fill in when the last minute emails go out for additional volunteers. And yes we both work full time in non-remote jobs. I accept the fact that kids activities require parent participation. We both are volunteer coaches in other sports too. We are firmly in the camp that if you can’t volunteer, don’t participate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a Team Rep. I was asked to be one because I have an A meet swimmer. I did not feel like I could say no. I don’t mind doing it but I did not “covet” the job, angle to get it, or strategize about how to get it. I don’t consider myself to be part of any “clique” but if you are calling the volunteers who have gotten to know each other through doing these jobs a “clique,” well, okay, but I assure you that at our pool anybody who steps up to take these bigger volunteer roles is embraced and welcomed wholeheartedly to the so-called “clique.”

Really? There are plenty of A meet parents and other qualified parents for the role. Why were you asked and not them?

You sound like you yourself wanted to be asked to do something and were not. Have you ever inquired to your team leadership as to whether you could be considered for a bigger job? I could virtually guarantee that you'd be able to land concessions without anybody fighting you. Running the equivalent of a hot-menu food truck, up to health code, with only inexperienced volunteers, at every home meet is probably second in difficulty only to being team rep (or coaching).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a Team Rep. I was asked to be one because I have an A meet swimmer. I did not feel like I could say no. I don’t mind doing it but I did not “covet” the job, angle to get it, or strategize about how to get it. I don’t consider myself to be part of any “clique” but if you are calling the volunteers who have gotten to know each other through doing these jobs a “clique,” well, okay, but I assure you that at our pool anybody who steps up to take these bigger volunteer roles is embraced and welcomed wholeheartedly to the so-called “clique.”

Really? There are plenty of A meet parents and other qualified parents for the role. Why were you asked and not them?

Former team rep here. I think it’s hilarious that you think there are “plenty” of people to do that job. No one wants to do it. It’s a lot of work, much of it behind the scenes. There are very few people willing to take it on. I work full time and balancing the role with my job was intense. I’m so glad I did it, but I’m glad to have “retired”.

+1. It was the 2 longest summers of my life (our pool does 2 year cycles). Great experience but definitely something felt like I had to do rather than wanted to do. If you are a parent craving that level of involvement, make sure the current leadership knows! There are very few parents that I would actively oppose - really just the ones who are overly focused on their own kids or have a particular agenda rather than trying to make the team successful and happy.

[Anonymous]

We belong to a double digit division pool and the people who want this job are crazy, in my opinion. They want the control of sitting in the seeding meetings, having power, and bossing people around.

They forget that summer swim is supposed to be fun and honestly make it the very opposite of fun. To the point where good people no longer want to participate in the club because of the crazy drama!