Explain abortion to 8yo
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Anonymous
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We went past a Hope demonstration, with signs of fetuses photos, baby murdererers etc.
8yo and 5 yo in the car. 8yo asking what is this etc. I wasn't prepared so I managed to difuse him saying people were protesting, what about? I said it is a little long to explain, I will tell you when I pick you up. I dropped him off at this activity, so there was really no time to get into this, plus I wasn't sure how to explain it to him, even more tricky with 5yo listening. Anybody has ideas? This will come up again really soon. |
Anonymous
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Change the subject. They're 8 and 5. As a parent/caregiver, you set the agenda.
AS for the protest, I tell the kids "the people outside feel strongly about an issue and have a right under our constitution to meet and discuss it. The photos are scary, but we're going to drive right by then and go do something. It'll all be just fine." I don't let other people tell me when to tell my children about such topics. I'm the parent. |
Anonymous
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^^ something fun, that is.
More likely, I won't have to say anything at all because I usually bring an iPad so that they can watch videos in the car. Problem solved. |
Anonymous
You seriously think frying their brains with ipads is better than TALKING to them?? OP, if you think it's too early to discuss, I think you can just say, "That's something I can fully explain when you're older." |
Anonymous
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I told my son to close his eyes. He was 5 when we passed a bunch of freaks doing that near the late-term abortion clinic in Germantown. I told him those people might have good intentions, but that they are likely mentally ill.
And yes, I think people who hold pictures like that up in public are mentally ill. |
Anonymous
| So what is a good age to explain it and how would you approach it. |
Anonymous
The same time you start to discuss their reproduction choices. Puberty. Eight is too young IMO. |
Anonymous
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My 6year old is aware of the abortion debate. I've iold him that when its when a woman decides not to go through with a pregnancy, or not to carry a pregnancy to term. He doesn't need to know the details about how it's done, but he knows that I'm pro-choice, that there are infinite reasons why a woman would not carry a pregnancy to term, and that it's a hot political issue right now.
How much of all that does he understand? No idea. I've kept it casual, I haven't gotten into the details (I also haven't mentioned it except for when he has asked me about it after hearing it on the radio or something) but he also knows it's why I disagree with certain people's political agendas. I don't believe in sheltering my kid - he knows a lot about current events because we discuss the news all the time. Some of those current events are even of interest to him - like Scott Kelly's year in space experiment. |
Anonymous
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I think the age differs depending on the child. If they ask, then I think you need to explain. The age will dictate how you discuss it. Your values as well, obviously.
I'm pro-choice and my son specifically asked around age 8. I told him that sometimes a woman chooses to end a pregnancy before the baby is born. There are a lot of different reasons for that. Sometimes the baby is very sick and won't live anyway. Sometimes the baby is making the mom very sick. Sometimes the mom doesn't have enough money to raise a baby. And there are many more reasons. He asked if I would have gotten rid of him. Which I think is a very natural question, so be prepared for it. I said no, he was a planned baby and very much wanted. And I have access to excellent health care and made sure both he and I were as healthy as possible. As he gets older he will learn more about the complexities of choice. |
Anonymous
| Expressing their right to free speech. next topic. 8 years old is too young. |
Anonymous
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When mine asked about it, they were younger than 8 but I can't remember exactly how young. I told them that sometimes when women are pregnant, their circumstances change and they're not able to be a good mom. We talked about some possibile reasons why someone might not be ready to have babies such as age, finances, school, etc. I said that sometimes, rather than having the baby knowing she isn't ready to be a great mom, she can take some medicine or have a small procedure (kind of like a surgery) to make her not be pregnant any more. We also discussed adoption and what a wonderful gift that is. Then we talked about how our bodies are our own and we get to make choices about our own bodies, including when to have babies.
It was a simple convo. NBD. Don't make it any more complicated than you have to, don't act upset about the topic or he'll pick up on your stress, and don't bring up sex I you don't want to explain sex. If he brings it up, give the simplest, shortest version of the truth you're able to and let him ask for more info when he's ready to hear it. |
Anonymous
Why is 8 too young? He's been exposed to the idea. I've seen some of the anti abortion posters and some of them are quite graphic. I'd rather give him a little knowledge to go with that than let his imagination run wild. He can ask his friends at school and get misinformation. I like to stay ahead of that and be the one who teaches my kids these things. |
Anonymous
What does next topic mean? That you think you have offered the tight answer and everyone else should move on? |
Anonymous
It means the kid learns he can only ask his parent about certain things. A big recipe for shutting down later in life. |
Anonymous
This! The response at 10:52 is how I responded as well. My child went to preschool on the Mall and has seen protestors, and that idiot who drives around in the truck plastered with signs. Knowing my child, I believe ignoring it would have created fear and concern. |