No one to sit with on the bus

[Anonymous]

My DD is in 3rd grade. The person she used to sit with on the bus now rides in to school with her parents. Seating arrangements seemed to have already formed and my daughter, who is not socially cool, is having a hard time breaking into the established groups. Any advice?

[Anonymous]

Just sit in an empty seat. Bring a book. Done.

[Anonymous]

Good answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just sit in an empty seat. Bring a book. Done.

This is what my girls do. They will not sit together and there aren't a lot of other girls on the bus, so they sit alone and usually read.

[Anonymous]

OMG, Op you know too much information, or you are taking it way to seriously. You want a kid who can deal with this kind of thing. Let go, they will survive.

[Anonymous]

What's your plan to deal with this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG, Op you know too much information, or you are taking it way to seriously. You want a kid who can deal with this kind of thing. Let go, they will survive.

You know, this can be heartbreaking for a kid. Especially if there aren't any empty seats on the bus, which most don't seem to have and there can be the mean girl "You can't sit here." Have a little compassion.

[Anonymous]

I was that girl growing up. I did what the previous poster said - read a book and ignored it. I was the "new" girl starting in 4th grade, so no one really talked to me or wanted to sit by me until probably 6th grade. Now, around here, I'm surprised there is even room for an empty seat. My DS has to sit 3 to a seat and every single row is filled. They are squashed like bugs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG, Op you know too much information, or you are taking it way to seriously. You want a kid who can deal with this kind of thing. Let go, they will survive.

You know, this can be heartbreaking for a kid. Especially if there aren't any empty seats on the bus, which most don't seem to have and there can be the mean girl "You can't sit here." Have a little compassion.

Not pp, but this is a pretty low diagnoses of "heartbreaking." But I suppose I'm old school, and I think that dealing with some "heartbreak" or sadness as a child is important and good. Lessons better learned young, for a better, more resilient, stronger person as they grow older. And all things considered, sitting alone on the bus is extremely benign.

[Anonymous]

OP here. My daughter has experienced a lot of difficulties in her past. We changed schools because she was bullied. Picked on repeatedly, threatened, and kicked. She is a sweet kid, just not very socially aware, which we are working on but will always be a struggle for her. She was so excited to go to this new school and start new but so far she has had a hard time making new friends. She is the first child on the bus as we are at the end of the line and she dreads all these kids coming in and not sitting next to her - several squeezing in with others to avoid her. She is not antagonized, but it still hurts when everyone walks right by a perfectly good empty seat and no one wants to sit with her. She has "friends" at school, none ride her bus.

I know this experience builds character, but she is only 8 and has been through so much already. I had suggested she read on the bus but she gets distracted with all the fun and laughter going on around her.

All I wanted was some tips on how to break the ice and have this year be less stressful for her.

[Anonymous]

OP, if these are kids in the neighborhood, any way for her to become friendly through some activity like sports it Girl Scouts or something? Any after-school clubs where she can forge friendships with them? Otherwise, reading a book seems like a good idea. Maybe if it's something interesting the other kids will even ask about it. It's really hard to know your child feels lonely. Ignore the PPs who are trivializing it. You're not saying her life is ruined, but she feels sad and therefore do do you. Lots of us have been there in some way or another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. My daughter has experienced a lot of difficulties in her past. We changed schools because she was bullied. Picked on repeatedly, threatened, and kicked. She is a sweet kid, just not very socially aware, which we are working on but will always be a struggle for her. She was so excited to go to this new school and start new but so far she has had a hard time making new friends. She is the first child on the bus as we are at the end of the line and she dreads all these kids coming in and not sitting next to her - several squeezing in with others to avoid her. She is not antagonized, but it still hurts when everyone walks right by a perfectly good empty seat and no one wants to sit with her. She has "friends" at school, none ride her bus.

I know this experience builds character, but she is only 8 and has been through so much already. I had suggested she read on the bus but she gets distracted with all the fun and laughter going on around her.

All I wanted was some tips on how to break the ice and have this year be less stressful for her.

Sorry, but children dont need to be occupied with friends 24/7. She needs to learn to be independent

[Anonymous]

Sorry to hear about what she's been through OP. Can you talk to the bus driver and get some help? The bus driver helped my shy and new daughter and she made her first friend that way. The driver asked for a volunteer to sit with her and a wonderful girl her same age sat with her and they've sat together (off and on) for four years now and have also become friends outside of the bus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry to hear about what she's been through OP. Can you talk to the bus driver and get some help? The bus driver helped my shy and new daughter and she made her first friend that way. The driver asked for a volunteer to sit with her and a wonderful girl her same age sat with her and they've sat together (off and on) for four years now and have also become friends outside of the bus.

That sounds embarrassing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. My daughter has experienced a lot of difficulties in her past. We changed schools because she was bullied. Picked on repeatedly, threatened, and kicked. She is a sweet kid, just not very socially aware, which we are working on but will always be a struggle for her. She was so excited to go to this new school and start new but so far she has had a hard time making new friends. She is the first child on the bus as we are at the end of the line and she dreads all these kids coming in and not sitting next to her - several squeezing in with others to avoid her. She is not antagonized, but it still hurts when everyone walks right by a perfectly good empty seat and no one wants to sit with her. She has "friends" at school, none ride her bus.

I know this experience builds character, but she is only 8 and has been through so much already. I had suggested she read on the bus but she gets distracted with all the fun and laughter going on around her.

All I wanted was some tips on how to break the ice and have this year be less stressful for her.

Sorry, but children dont need to be occupied with friends 24/7. She needs to learn to be independent

Okay, truth telling time now--you were one of the mean girls weren't you?