GenX and older, perpetual dieting. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a boomer mother and I relate to this so hard. Both she and my former mother in law, both in their 70s, are obsessed with weight and being thin. my mom has been scary skinny her whole life and it's a big point of pride for her. It's a life achievement that she still manages to bring up on a daily basis. Never misses a way to work in to the conversation that she is "still the same weight she was in high school". I hope when I am in my 70s I have other things to reflect back on than "staying thin."

Being the same weight as high school is a big thing in East Asia, we have people immigrated for over 30 years, weight train and eat mostly western diet and still boast about wearing t shirt from high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm around 60, older Gen X. I never diet, never have. I just stay active. Yesterday I put more than 17,000 steps and 140 active minutes on my fitness tracker between my long walk and yardwork. I do this 3-4 times a week. I eat three square meals, enjoy a glass of red wine every day and a small dessert. I can still wear my shirts from middle and high school. You must keep yourself moving.

And you work 40 or 50 hours a week in an office job too? I’m just kidding you couldn’t possibly be a law firm partner and have that much free time. I’m 60 too and 30 pounds overweight from the stress

The stress will kill you more than the weight. Law firm partner money you made will be left for your husbands next wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The GLP craze has exposed the lie that people liked being fat and accepted their bodies.

Bingo. All of the plus size celebs have dropped the weight. Even Miss All About That Bass.

My sister is a youtube influencer and gained so many followers about loving being fat and fighting body shaming (although she regularly shamed normal to thin people).

I about dropped dead when she went on ozempic. I couldn't even believe it. Her whole schtick was talking about loving being fat. When I mentioned it to my mom she said "why did you think that? No one wants to be fat." I'm still in shock and I guess it was all a lie.

This is a tough one. I was always a normal weight and then gained a lot postpartum after going on an antidepressant, plus I have PCOS (now PMOS, yay!). For the past several years I tried to be body positive but of course internally I felt bad about how I looked and also worried about the consequences of the extra weight that I just couldn't lose. Now that I'm on Zepbound and losing it's a such a relief to feel more confident and healthier. Honestly, I'm so incredibly grateful that I don't have to live in a larger body anymore. But I also don't hate my old self, if that makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a boomer mother and I relate to this so hard. Both she and my former mother in law, both in their 70s, are obsessed with weight and being thin. my mom has been scary skinny her whole life and it's a big point of pride for her. It's a life achievement that she still manages to bring up on a daily basis. Never misses a way to work in to the conversation that she is "still the same weight she was in high school". I hope when I am in my 70s I have other things to reflect back on than "staying thin."

My mom weighed 90 pounds on her wedding day and you would think she cured cancer the way she talks about it as the biggest accomplishment of her life. She was an aerospace engineer in the 60s and 70s and combatted incredible sexism in the workplace but she's for sure more proud of her weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a boomer mother and I relate to this so hard. Both she and my former mother in law, both in their 70s, are obsessed with weight and being thin. my mom has been scary skinny her whole life and it's a big point of pride for her. It's a life achievement that she still manages to bring up on a daily basis. Never misses a way to work in to the conversation that she is "still the same weight she was in high school". I hope when I am in my 70s I have other things to reflect back on than "staying thin."

Being the same weight as high school is a big thing in East Asia, we have people immigrated for over 30 years, weight train and eat mostly western diet and still boast about wearing t shirt from high school.

That's interesting! My mom is a white midwestern lady.

[Anonymous]

According to the charts I am 2 1/2 inches shorter than I was in high school. So, I need to weigh less to be at the same weigh class as I was in high school. It stinks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:According to the charts I am 2 1/2 inches shorter than I was in high school. So, I need to weigh less to be at the same weigh class as I was in high school. It stinks.

You seem to have missed the point of this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom never "talked" about weight but ate every meal on a salad plate or saucer. I just thought that's what women did, until, I went to dinner with my MIL. She ordered a full sized pork chop dinner. I was shocked. She is about the same size as my mom too. Thin.
However, my Sisters in law are obese. Not a deal but they talk about their obesity all the time.

My mother never ate dinner with us. She would make the meat loaf and mashed potatoes or whatever but then had a thin slice of toast for dinner every night. Seemed to subsist on M and M’s and that slice of toast and lots of black coffee. Growing up I assumed women didn’t eat dinner? Or breakfast?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, blame the boomers for dieting.

Oh sweetie, the boomers are YOUR parents. Ours are greatest gen.

My greatest gen grandparents thought being fat, over indulging, eating garbage was a moral failing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm around 60, older Gen X. I never diet, never have. I just stay active. Yesterday I put more than 17,000 steps and 140 active minutes on my fitness tracker between my long walk and yardwork. I do this 3-4 times a week. I eat three square meals, enjoy a glass of red wine every day and a small dessert. I can still wear my shirts from middle and high school. You must keep yourself moving.

And you work 40 or 50 hours a week in an office job too? I’m just kidding you couldn’t possibly be a law firm partner and have that much free time. I’m 60 too and 30 pounds overweight from the stress

I’m mid 50s, lift, walk daily(though not 17k!), and a bunch of other things. And I’m a law firm partner. Haven’t you understood by now that no one really cares about you as a person at all firm? You have to look out for you.

Exactly - which brings up another toxic Gen X trait. Trading personal health outcomes for more compensation or some other striver goal. Or flexing by talking about how little personal time they have because of work.

It’s not a flex at all and just shows how imbalanced your life is. Anybody can find time to be healthy, it just costs something else. Choose wisely.

[Anonymous]

I think whether you feel traumatized or content about your eating habits is all a matter of perception.

My family is from western Europe and has always been very judgemental about women's bodies. I have been called fat and told not to eat so much. Funnily enough, that didn't really bother me - I am not the sort of person to feel ill-used easily.

I watch what I eat in middle age, not because I've been conditioned to do that by my family, but more importantly because I have borderline high cholesterol and my HbA1C has occasionally been elevated. I don't want to block my arteries or develop diabetes like a few of my relatives! Two of them had stents put in, and one had multiple bypass surgery. My father has a lot of atherosclerosis. None of them are overweight. They just didn't eat the right things, plus we probably have a genetic predisposition to high cholesterol. But they were uninformed when they were younger, and thought looking slender and eating less, not better, was the goal.

I want to be healthy. I am naturally slim (but still fat in my mother's eyes, ha!), so this isn't really about looking a certain way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom never "talked" about weight but ate every meal on a salad plate or saucer. I just thought that's what women did, until, I went to dinner with my MIL. She ordered a full sized pork chop dinner. I was shocked. She is about the same size as my mom too. Thin.
However, my Sisters in law are obese. Not a deal but they talk about their obesity all the time.

My mother never ate dinner with us. She would make the meat loaf and mashed potatoes or whatever but then had a thin slice of toast for dinner every night. Seemed to subsist on M and M’s and that slice of toast and lots of black coffee. Growing up I assumed women didn’t eat dinner? Or breakfast?

This thread is really helpful to me. My mom and my grandmother both had serious issues around weight and food like this. My mom will still, every time I see her and she eats an actual meal, justify it by telling me that she hasn't eaten anything else that day. You can just have a meal!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think whether you feel traumatized or content about your eating habits is all a matter of perception.

My family is from western Europe and has always been very judgemental about women's bodies. I have been called fat and told not to eat so much. Funnily enough, that didn't really bother me - I am not the sort of person to feel ill-used easily.

I watch what I eat in middle age, not because I've been conditioned to do that by my family, but more importantly because I have borderline high cholesterol and my HbA1C has occasionally been elevated. I don't want to block my arteries or develop diabetes like a few of my relatives! Two of them had stents put in, and one had multiple bypass surgery. My father has a lot of atherosclerosis. None of them are overweight. They just didn't eat the right things, plus we probably have a genetic predisposition to high cholesterol. But they were uninformed when they were younger, and thought looking slender and eating less, not better, was the goal.

I want to be healthy. I am naturally slim (but still fat in my mother's eyes, ha!), so this isn't really about looking a certain way.

Sorry, you lost me at "has always been very judgmental about women's bodies" and not understanding in middle age why this is a bad thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm around 60, older Gen X. I never diet, never have. I just stay active. Yesterday I put more than 17,000 steps and 140 active minutes on my fitness tracker between my long walk and yardwork. I do this 3-4 times a week. I eat three square meals, enjoy a glass of red wine every day and a small dessert. I can still wear my shirts from middle and high school. You must keep yourself moving.

And you work 40 or 50 hours a week in an office job too? I’m just kidding you couldn’t possibly be a law firm partner and have that much free time. I’m 60 too and 30 pounds overweight from the stress

I’m mid 50s, lift, walk daily(though not 17k!), and a bunch of other things. And I’m a law firm partner. Haven’t you understood by now that no one really cares about you as a person at all firm? You have to look out for you.

Exactly - which brings up another toxic Gen X trait. Trading personal health outcomes for more compensation or some other striver goal. Or flexing by talking about how little personal time they have because of work.

It’s not a flex at all and just shows how imbalanced your life is. Anybody can find time to be healthy, it just costs something else. Choose wisely.

I am the poster to whom you are responding. At some point, we do have much more control over our lives than we think, and when we do, it's worth considering why we are making our choices. It is a choice to be a 60-year old law partner and continually prioritize your work deadlines over your health. And if you are going to do it, own it. None of that snarky sh*t she was dishing out.