First-Time Middle School Parent – Seeking Survival Tips

[Anonymous]

Another thread that shows that some posters can’t fathom a situation different from theirs — like what grades are MS, is it the early bus run/open time, or whether laptops are part of the educational environment.

There are a few good tidbits that I’ll double down on and add a few of my own: set a routine (for preparation, meal and sleep times), be prepared for your DC to morph from “child” to “teen”, that their friend group will probably change, be a hard-ass on limiting screen time, and remember it’s ok to still be involved in their school/activites but it’s time to begin stepping back and letting them take charge. “Now” is the time for them to make mistakes, when the consequences are usually far less and there’s lots more time to learn from them and take corrective actions.

Blink. And you’ll miss it.

Oh, and be prepared to drive/chauffeur them around. A lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:- All flu vaccines for the entire family done by August. 2 weeks before school opens. It messes up your kid's academics
to fall sick in the first quarter.=
- Zinc tabs, airborne tabs, occilococinum tabs, germex and face masks. Kleenex with lotion.
- All physicals finished before school (Birthdays are in August thankfully)
- All dental cleaning, eye exams, derm appointment finished
- Two of everything that my kid could lose and marked them very well - 2 lunch boxes, 2 sets of outerwear, 2 bookbags, 2 sneakers etc.
- Asked for and got the syllabus from the district before school started.
- Bought all the textbooks for all the subjects second hand in Amazon. Even if I did not know exactly which text books were being used. I went by the topics in the syllabus.
- Also bought second hand - all the summer reading list books. Used other schools websites to get multiple lists. Made sure kid read many of these books.
- Hired tutors and made sure that my kids were ahead by at least a quarter in some key subjects.
- At least two weeks of vacation abroad.
- Life skills - some chores and some cooking lessons.

This poster failed MS science - flu vaccine better by end of October so it doesn't wear off too fast. Airborne? really!?

Nope. Nope. Mid-August flu vaccine (preferably quadrivalent jab) so that you have built up immunity in the two weeks before school opens.

By Jan 20th - most kids would have already travelled in a herd and fallen ill with flu or other respiratory illness - summer break travelling, school opening, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, NYE travelling. You have no need to worry after that because most kids have fallen ill and recovered, even if they did not get the vaccine. You don't need to get a jab in October and then be covered till March. You need to be covered from Sept to mid-Jan.

Most kids fall sick in September and October. And lo and behold, you have wrecked their first quarter, first semester.

Airborne works well for us, but then we are also vaxxed, wear masks in stores, use hand sanitizer and avoid the school buses that are packed like tins of sardines.

How wrong you are. Most cases of flu last year were Feb, March and even into April. Flu season usually kicks into high gear beginning of February.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC 7th grader wears school outfit to sleep, backpack/school laptop/cellphone go downstairs packed to charge and ready to pack in the morning ( school laptop losing power quickly and takes long time to charge; cellphone can only be used after dismissal, there’s no room teacher nor front desk to help communicate between parents & their kids). Lunch box/water bottles are ready to pack in the morning. Arrives at the school bus stop 5 min early so leave enough time at least for first week. There’s only 5 min in between bells to either run to restroom or locker ( teachers would mark tardy if you’re late to classroom, but students can go to restroom after class started ), so DC try not to drink water and doesn’t use restroom in the morning, and brings 2 classes folders/binders at once.

Why? This is a terrible habit to teach. They are old enough to get themselves dressed in the morning. It shouldn’t take more than 2 min to put on clean clothes in the morning. Would you go to work in what you wore to bed all night?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC 7th grader wears school outfit to sleep, backpack/school laptop/cellphone go downstairs packed to charge and ready to pack in the morning ( school laptop losing power quickly and takes long time to charge; cellphone can only be used after dismissal, there’s no room teacher nor front desk to help communicate between parents & their kids). Lunch box/water bottles are ready to pack in the morning. Arrives at the school bus stop 5 min early so leave enough time at least for first week. There’s only 5 min in between bells to either run to restroom or locker ( teachers would mark tardy if you’re late to classroom, but students can go to restroom after class started ), so DC try not to drink water and doesn’t use restroom in the morning, and brings 2 classes folders/binders at once.

Why? This is a terrible habit to teach. They are old enough to get themselves dressed in the morning. It shouldn’t take more than 2 min to put on clean clothes in the morning. Would you go to work in what you wore to bed all night?

What’s wrong with putting in clean tee and legging before bedtime? We wash entire bedding weekly. What specific outfits students must change into before going to school that you suggest?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC 7th grader wears school outfit to sleep, backpack/school laptop/cellphone go downstairs packed to charge and ready to pack in the morning ( school laptop losing power quickly and takes long time to charge; cellphone can only be used after dismissal, there’s no room teacher nor front desk to help communicate between parents & their kids). Lunch box/water bottles are ready to pack in the morning. Arrives at the school bus stop 5 min early so leave enough time at least for first week. There’s only 5 min in between bells to either run to restroom or locker ( teachers would mark tardy if you’re late to classroom, but students can go to restroom after class started ), so DC try not to drink water and doesn’t use restroom in the morning, and brings 2 classes folders/binders at once.

Why? This is a terrible habit to teach. They are old enough to get themselves dressed in the morning. It shouldn’t take more than 2 min to put on clean clothes in the morning. Would you go to work in what you wore to bed all night?

What’s wrong with putting in clean tee and legging before bedtime? We wash entire bedding weekly. What specific outfits students must change into before going to school that you suggest?

Ones they didn’t sleep in all night. People sweat in their sleep, clothes get rumpled, and it’s just poor hygiene. Jesus, put on clean clothes in the morning. Maybe I’d have some sympathy if this was a toddler and getting him dressed in the morning was a physical struggle and exhausting. But this is a teen. C’mon, have some decency.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:- All flu vaccines for the entire family done by August. 2 weeks before school opens. It messes up your kid's academics
to fall sick in the first quarter.=
- Zinc tabs, airborne tabs, occilococinum tabs, germex and face masks. Kleenex with lotion.
- All physicals finished before school (Birthdays are in August thankfully)
- All dental cleaning, eye exams, derm appointment finished
- Two of everything that my kid could lose and marked them very well - 2 lunch boxes, 2 sets of outerwear, 2 bookbags, 2 sneakers etc.
- Asked for and got the syllabus from the district before school started.
- Bought all the textbooks for all the subjects second hand in Amazon. Even if I did not know exactly which text books were being used. I went by the topics in the syllabus.
- Also bought second hand - all the summer reading list books. Used other schools websites to get multiple lists. Made sure kid read many of these books.
- Hired tutors and made sure that my kids were ahead by at least a quarter in some key subjects.
- At least two weeks of vacation abroad.
- Life skills - some chores and some cooking lessons.

This poster failed MS science - flu vaccine better by end of October so it doesn't wear off too fast. Airborne? really!?

Nope. Nope. Mid-August flu vaccine (preferably quadrivalent jab) so that you have built up immunity in the two weeks before school opens.

By Jan 20th - most kids would have already travelled in a herd and fallen ill with flu or other respiratory illness - summer break travelling, school opening, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, NYE travelling. You have no need to worry after that because most kids have fallen ill and recovered, even if they did not get the vaccine. You don't need to get a jab in October and then be covered till March. You need to be covered from Sept to mid-Jan.

Most kids fall sick in September and October. And lo and behold, you have wrecked their first quarter, first semester.

Airborne works well for us, but then we are also vaxxed, wear masks in stores, use hand sanitizer and avoid the school buses that are packed like tins of sardines.

Troll
Troll
Troll
Troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC 7th grader wears school outfit to sleep, backpack/school laptop/cellphone go downstairs packed to charge and ready to pack in the morning ( school laptop losing power quickly and takes long time to charge; cellphone can only be used after dismissal, there’s no room teacher nor front desk to help communicate between parents & their kids). Lunch box/water bottles are ready to pack in the morning. Arrives at the school bus stop 5 min early so leave enough time at least for first week. There’s only 5 min in between bells to either run to restroom or locker ( teachers would mark tardy if you’re late to classroom, but students can go to restroom after class started ), so DC try not to drink water and doesn’t use restroom in the morning, and brings 2 classes folders/binders at once.

Excuse me, what? My kids get out their clothes the night before, but why would you make them sleep in their clothes? It takes 30 seconds to change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC 7th grader wears school outfit to sleep, backpack/school laptop/cellphone go downstairs packed to charge and ready to pack in the morning ( school laptop losing power quickly and takes long time to charge; cellphone can only be used after dismissal, there’s no room teacher nor front desk to help communicate between parents & their kids). Lunch box/water bottles are ready to pack in the morning. Arrives at the school bus stop 5 min early so leave enough time at least for first week. There’s only 5 min in between bells to either run to restroom or locker ( teachers would mark tardy if you’re late to classroom, but students can go to restroom after class started ), so DC try not to drink water and doesn’t use restroom in the morning, and brings 2 classes folders/binders at once.

Why? This is a terrible habit to teach. They are old enough to get themselves dressed in the morning. It shouldn’t take more than 2 min to put on clean clothes in the morning. Would you go to work in what you wore to bed all night?

+1 that is just gross!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MS was 6th - 8th in our district.

As a rising 6th grade parent, I scheduled a very long meeting with the school counselor during summer break. I took my kid to the meeting and I basically asked for -
- 3 years of schedule - what would be taught when.
- Marked out which subjects would be considered HS credits.
- Timeline for any tests or exams that would be administered - MAPs , HSAs etc.
- All the options for electives and various permutation and combinations of subjects and how they would impact HS course selection.
- All low hanging fruits for MS.

I then put everything in a spreadsheet.

- I made sure that I had put my kids in varioys kinds of enrichment, EC activities before MS started.
- Made my kids take all the available ECs in after-school clubs
- Made sure that my kids started doing scholastic tournaments
- Made sure that my kids started amassing the SSL hours, also organizing community volunteer activities to enable other kids to get their community hours.
- Made sure that I dropped and picked up my kids (and often times their friends) by car. It allowed me to become friends with the parents of these children and eventually I was able to coach some STEM programs for these kids and take part in STEM competitions as a group.
- I packed two snacks - one for lunch and one for after school clubs.
- Kids showered at night. clothes were laid out at night, all assignments were completed and bags were ready at night.
- I was a volunteer at the school. I was very clued in about what was happening in the school.

This is a joke, right? Right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MS was 6th - 8th in our district.

As a rising 6th grade parent, I scheduled a very long meeting with the school counselor during summer break. I took my kid to the meeting and I basically asked for -
- 3 years of schedule - what would be taught when.
- Marked out which subjects would be considered HS credits.
- Timeline for any tests or exams that would be administered - MAPs , HSAs etc.
- All the options for electives and various permutation and combinations of subjects and how they would impact HS course selection.
- All low hanging fruits for MS.

I then put everything in a spreadsheet.

- I made sure that I had put my kids in varioys kinds of enrichment, EC activities before MS started.
- Made my kids take all the available ECs in after-school clubs
- Made sure that my kids started doing scholastic tournaments
- Made sure that my kids started amassing the SSL hours, also organizing community volunteer activities to enable other kids to get their community hours.
- Made sure that I dropped and picked up my kids (and often times their friends) by car. It allowed me to become friends with the parents of these children and eventually I was able to coach some STEM programs for these kids and take part in STEM competitions as a group.
- I packed two snacks - one for lunch and one for after school clubs.
- Kids showered at night. clothes were laid out at night, all assignments were completed and bags were ready at night.
- I was a volunteer at the school. I was very clued in about what was happening in the school.

This is a joke, right? Right?

It has to be. The meeting with the counselor in the summer? Didn’t happen. Counselors are off in summers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MS was 6th - 8th in our district.

As a rising 6th grade parent, I scheduled a very long meeting with the school counselor during summer break. I took my kid to the meeting and I basically asked for -
- 3 years of schedule - what would be taught when.
- Marked out which subjects would be considered HS credits.
- Timeline for any tests or exams that would be administered - MAPs , HSAs etc.
- All the options for electives and various permutation and combinations of subjects and how they would impact HS course selection.
- All low hanging fruits for MS.

I then put everything in a spreadsheet.

- I made sure that I had put my kids in varioys kinds of enrichment, EC activities before MS started.
- Made my kids take all the available ECs in after-school clubs
- Made sure that my kids started doing scholastic tournaments
- Made sure that my kids started amassing the SSL hours, also organizing community volunteer activities to enable other kids to get their community hours.
- Made sure that I dropped and picked up my kids (and often times their friends) by car. It allowed me to become friends with the parents of these children and eventually I was able to coach some STEM programs for these kids and take part in STEM competitions as a group.
- I packed two snacks - one for lunch and one for after school clubs.
- Kids showered at night. clothes were laid out at night, all assignments were completed and bags were ready at night.
- I was a volunteer at the school. I was very clued in about what was happening in the school.

This is a joke, right? Right?

You missed the second half of the post! There’s more to the list

[Anonymous]

This worked for us but it might not work for everyone. We put our kid in morning swim. He went before school and it woke him up for the day energized and forced him to shower well before school. It regulated the rest is the day and he was tired and ready for bed by a decent time.

In your case, dinner- practice- shower - bed. Nothing else scheduled for the evenings. The two other nights are homework nights and the third leftover night is family time (Friday). There will be more homework but it's not a lot. They also get a planning period/Win Time to work on homework during school hours. Unless your kid is taking Algebra or a foreign language in 7th grade, they should be fine.