Will/guardianship legal questions

[Anonymous]

We don't have a lot of savings or assets. All we really care about at this point is that should dh and I die at the same time, we want our son to be raised by my brother, and for all assets to go to ds and/or my brother.

Do we need a will? Or, will all money and property go to next of kin anyway (ds ), whether we have a will or not? Is there a legal document we can use for guardianship if we die?

I guess I'm looking for the simplest, fastest (and cheapest ) way to be sure our son goes to our chosen guardian...some unfortunate developments made us realize another family member could cause a problem in this unlikely event.

[Anonymous]

You need a lawyer to make sure you do everything correctly. Shop around for a flat fee rate. Make sure you bIL knows the plan. Also let others know.

We have copies of our will to the guardian and to my parents. We have told others of our plan. We don't want any surprises for people.

[Anonymous]

Make a will. If you die while your child is young, you won't want all of that money going straight to him, you'll want it in a trust so it's protected. If you don't have a will, there's no way to make that happen.

[Anonymous]

Remember that even if listed in a will, guardianship is a preference, not a legal mandate. Ie. a court doesn't have to follow what you write, but normally takes it strongly into consideration.

We have a similar situation, where we would actively not want someone as a guardian. In addition to listing various people in order of preference who should be considered for guardianship (all of whom have agreed to the role), we also explicitly stated that we don't want person X to be a consideration.

[Anonymous]

Yes. You need a will. Plus you need a trust. And you should identify your preferred guardian but you cannot mandate that part-it's up to the courts after you die.

[Anonymous]

You absolutely need a will. We created a "springing trust" which becomes a trust in the event of our deaths (that way we didn't have to re-titled our house in the trust's name now, etc.). We named a guardian and a trustee for the trust in the will.

At the same time we also got POA's and living wills done, for both of us, all for a really reasonable flat fee. (We had tried to use an online will thing, but we ended up having too many questions about the trust, etc -- it was worth the fee to have a lawyer answer our questions.)

FWIW, we used Martha Mothershead in Falls Church. Great to work with.

(My brother died without a will leaving 2 young kids and a widow. You DON'T want your survivors to have to deal with the hassles of probate court without a will, even with few assets. It's a HUGE stressor at a time when your death would be traumatic enough. Get a will.)

[Anonymous]

What do people mean when they say "a reasonable fee"? I have never paid for a lawyer before. Obviously this is important, but our money is pretty tight right now and laying out $1k+ to set this up just doesn't seem feasible.

[Anonymous]

If there is not a lot of assets, the expense of a trust is not warranted. Just designate 2 people (not brother and his spouse--perhaps 2 non related persons) to manage whatever monies are left to your son. A basic will for guardianship, that is not complicated with a bunch of assets need not be done by a lawyer. You can get a program like will maker to walk you through it.

[Anonymous]

You may want to consider choosing a physical guardian, plus a back up option, as well as a financial guardian, plus a back up. They are not necessarily the same people, and it may make things easier to keep the separate.

In some states you can write your own will and it will be upheld in a court of law if certain steps are followed. It is not advisable and not as safe as having a lawyer prepare it for you, but if you are seriously unable to pay, its better than nothing. Research your state to see if you can write your own will and figure out the steps you need to take to make it as valid as possible. Even if your state wont enforce the will, they may use it under advisement when making determinations about who will be guardian of your children.

For the most part, wills are only contested if there is something to argue about. So if you have a ton of money, people might try to get their hands on it. Or, if you have kids, people from different sides of the family might try to get custody. It can be an ugly scene. Your kids will be traumatized enough. Don't let this play out.

Also, if you want guardians other than close family members you definitely need a solid will. A court will not give the kids to best friend Amy when your sister Sally is ready, willing, and able to take the kids.

[Anonymous]

A publisher called Nolo has a good book on this you can probably borrow from the library. It explains wills, trusts, etc in detail. It has samples you can complete yourself and gives advice about figuring out whether you should use those samples or hire a lawyer.

If you think someone might contest the will, that's a reason to hire a lawyer, but reading the book before you see a lawyer can help you understand the basics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If there is not a lot of assets, the expense of a trust is not warranted. Just designate 2 people (not brother and his spouse--perhaps 2 non related persons) to manage whatever monies are left to your son. A basic will for guardianship, that is not complicated with a bunch of assets need not be done by a lawyer. You can get a program like will maker to walk you through it.

A trust is really the only way to protect an inheritance, no matter the size.

Regarding actual assets, don't forget to calculate life insurance. The general rule is that each partner should have a life insurance policy equaling ten years salary of the highest earner. So if dad made $100K a year and mom was a SAHM they each should have $1 million in life insurance. If they both die assets = $2 mil before any home equity, 401K's, pensions, savings, etc. That's a lot of money and should go into a trust managed by a person or persons other than the guardians and distributed to the children at some point when they reach maturity. In our case we designated that funds can be used for educational expenses until the age of 25 when DD would get 30% of trust and the balance when she turned 35.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If there is not a lot of assets, the expense of a trust is not warranted. Just designate 2 people (not brother and his spouse--perhaps 2 non related persons) to manage whatever monies are left to your son. A basic will for guardianship, that is not complicated with a bunch of assets need not be done by a lawyer. You can get a program like will maker to walk you through it.

A trust is really the only way to protect an inheritance, no matter the size.

Regarding actual assets, don't forget to calculate life insurance. The general rule is that each partner should have a life insurance policy equaling ten years salary of the highest earner. So if dad made $100K a year and mom was a SAHM they each should have $1 million in life insurance. If they both die assets = $2 mil before any home equity, 401K's, pensions, savings, etc. That's a lot of money and should go into a trust managed by a person or persons other than the guardians and distributed to the children at some point when they reach maturity. In our case we designated that funds can be used for educational expenses until the age of 25 when DD would get 30% of trust and the balance when she turned 35.

The cost of a trust is not warranted for all situstions. Get off of your marble throne.

[Anonymous]

^^^in this area the ball park numbers are not unusual, but op already stated that there are minimal assets. To make a blanket statement that everyone needs a trust is ignorant and elitist at the same time.

[Anonymous]

But was the OP considering insurance when she said asserts are minimal? Even a smaller policy would push asserts into six figures. No marble throne. Just a middle class Mom who spent a little time and money (less than $1000) planning.

[Anonymous]

And OP if you don't have life insurance get it. When you are young it's not expensive.