Preparing child to be home alone

[Anonymous]

We want to prepare our 12-YO to stay home alone for a few hours. Aside from going over: emergency and cell numbers, which neighbors to go to, not to use the stove, and not to open the door, is there anything we're forgetting?

Also, what is the current thinking on what she should say if someone comes to the door? In our neighborhood we get lots of solicitors. Is she supposed to say something like "Sorry, I can't open the door, go away" or alternatively is she supposed to pretend that an adult is there and say something like "my mom isn't available, go away"? (Our front door has a small safety-glass window that can be talked through.)

Thanks in advance for any help!

[Anonymous]

She doesn't need to answer the door - or speak to anyone at the door. She should stay inside and not go near the door in my opinion.

Have you had a practice run?

Maybe you should go out for 30 mins a few days in a row and see how it goes. Build the time up from there.

[Anonymous]

I am shocked your 12 year old has never been alone for a few hours.

[Anonymous]

OP, does your 12-year-old generally display good judgment? If so, I think you're fine with general guidelines:

1. phone numbers
2. emergency plan
3. no need to answer the door for solicitors
4. don't play with fire or do anything else that's dumb

On the other hand, if your 12-year-old has poor impulse control or frequently does things that seem like a bad idea, you might want to be more detailed, and you might want to start with 15-30 minutes at a time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She doesn't need to answer the door - or speak to anyone at the door. She should stay inside and not go near the door in my opinion.

Have you had a practice run?

Maybe you should go out for 30 mins a few days in a row and see how it goes. Build the time up from there.

OP here--thanks. I thought one is supposed to go to the store because if they think no one is home they could be planning to break in? At least that's what I've read. Is that wrong?

[Anonymous]

OP again--door, not store!

[Anonymous]

Do not answer the door. Your 12 year old is not old enough to negotiate that experience and your focus should be on her needs and her ability to handle the experience, not on some imaginary scenario in which burglars might be "casing the joint," which is so remote and unlikely as to be ridiculous.

Run through what she will do with her time. I would say no cooking, no stove use. Have her plan to do homework, watch tv, use the computer, some such thing.

[Anonymous]

She should not answer the door.

[Anonymous]

Yeah I would also advise against answering the door. Don't think the average Jehovah's witness will decide to rob the place if the door goes unanswered. In the event of a real break in I'd tell my child to just run over to a neighbours house and call the cops.

[Anonymous]

OP--thanks! The consensus is that she will not be answering the door.

[Anonymous]

A 12 year old isn't old enough to answer the door?

[Anonymous]

At my house, the rule is that you do not respond in any way to a knock at the door. Anyone who needs to get in has keys. And they know that if someone is breaking in the front door, to run out the back door and vice versa.

[Anonymous]

Make sure she knows where your gun is and how to use it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make sure she knows where your gun is and how to use it.

Oh...my...god...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At my house, the rule is that you do not respond in any way to a knock at the door. Anyone who needs to get in has keys. And they know that if someone is breaking in the front door, to run out the back door and vice versa.

Nobody you know ever knocks on your door? No neighbor, no mail carrier, no anybody? Only solicitors, proselytizers, and burglars casing the joint?