How do you deal with unruly older kids at the playground?
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Anonymous
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We've had several experiences recently with older (4-7 year old roughly) children nearly injuring our 16 month old For example, she was going down a slide, but slowly because she is not good at lifting her feet yet. A roughly 7 year old gets to the top, DH says "please wait until she is finished," 7 year old comes barreling down the slide without waiting, and DH yanks DD out of her path half a second before kid would have crashed into her. Another time recently, she was walking on a bridge that shakes, and a 4 or so year old runs in and starts shaking it violently and would have thrown her off it if we hadn't quickly grabbed her right away. We generally have been trying to re-direct her since she is so little/slow/unsteady, but at what point would you say something to the other kid or a parent (if one is even nearby...)? DH spent an hour at the park yesterday mostly moving her from one place to another as bigger kids made it unsafe for her to play.
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Anonymous
| I have yelled at older kids to stop or wait. The kids have always been startled by me and done as I asked. Then I thank them. I could not possibly care any less if the kid's parents are around or not. In the situations that you describe, there simply isn;t time to go looking for a parent or guardian. |
Anonymous
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You are on the wrong playground.
You need to redirect your own toddler to a foam toddler playground or if you choose to use the playground designed for older children, you need to move her out of the way when big kids are playing. Look at the age posted on the equipment. If it does not say toddler ages then you are in the wrong here. If it is a foam toddler llay space then encourage the preschoolers to be more careful. |
Anonymous
| I say, "please be careful around the little ones." But other than that, I would prefer to move my toddler and let the older ones play. |
Anonymous
| You may or may not be at the wrong playground -- I let my toddlers climb all over, so that they learned their limits. But you're definitely at the playground at the wrong time. Go at a different time when the "big" kids aren't there. |
Anonymous
| Yes, unfortunately 10:23 is 100% right. You can play on the big kid equipment if it's not being used, but you need to step aside when it is. You will realize this when your kid is the 6 year old trying to use the slide in an age appropriate way! |
Anonymous
| I think OP has a point though. My confident toddler can't be confined to the little kid playground and almost every big kid we come across is able to respect her space when she's on the big stuff. OTOH, I do not hover, so she doesn't get in situations she can't get out of like a big-kid slide. It sounds like DH helping her DD on the slide was one underlying cause of this problem. |
Anonymous
| I yell at the older kids; yeah, I know I shouldn't, but I can't help it. We usually go really early in the morning when it is all little kids and I do agree with the other posters that I only let my toddler play on the younger playground equipment. Then I don't feel bad about yelling at the 9 year old barreling around the 2 to 5 year old equipment. They are all labeled. |
Anonymous
| Plus what everyone else said. The playground is not just for toddlers - usually it's for older kids! Find a toddler park. As for "unruly" keep that in mind for your own child soon! |
Anonymous
| If older kids are playing roughly on the toddler playground, I just remind them to be careful of the little ones. But if you're playing on the big-kid equipment, then you need to move out of the way if older kids are using it. |
Anonymous
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There's a balance here. The older kids DO have priority to some extent on equipment made for them, but they also need to respect the younger kids and listen to adults who ask them to wait/step back/etc.
We dealt with this when my DS was about that age. Honestly, I don't think most parks are made for kids this young, so some of the responsibility is on you. You can let your kid use the equipment when there aren't others around, but I would take her off as soon as much older kids come into the picture. Go ahead and let her finish what she's doing, of course, and they should respect this, but it isn't really fair to ask them to wait for 10 minutes while she slowly climbs up the stairs and then uses the slide repeatedly. Many playgrounds have smaller structures for the little kids. Seek out one of these. Swings are great and safe for all ages because they are low-contact. And there are often structures for ages 2-5, which are usually great. Still challenging for a 16-month-old but not as dangerous. However, older kids absolutely need to watch out for little kids and need to respect the requests of other adults there. I have been in situations with kids who talked back and refused to listen when we told them that they needed to wait to go to the bottom of the slide (there were multiple 2-4 year olds at the bottom of the slide, and an 8-year-old who wanted to go down) -- on a structure designed for little kids, not big ones It's totally reasonable to ask older kids to be careful and to wait. Depending on age and experience (i.e. if they have little siblings), most will not realize they can't be that rough around little kids. A four-year-old, for example, is likely to be self-absorbed in play and will really benefit from you saying, "Please wait a minute. She's not as steady as you are." I usually try to appeal to older kids' sense of experience by telling them how my LO wants to be like them but isn't as strong/big/balanced/etc. yet. This usually works. A lot of times groups of girls (sometimes boys) will "adopt" a little toddler and help out even. If kids aren't listening to your requests, then it's appropriate to ask their parents to step in. But in my experience, the ones who aren't listening are usually the ones whose parents aren't even there. Sigh. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
Uh, yeah, you're just in the wrong. And that's bad modeling. You don't like the way other kids play so you yell at them. Good luck teaching your kid not to do that. And let me guess, you have one child. |
Anonymous
| You're a riot, OP. That's life. Get used to it. You'll learn. |
Anonymous
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Go early before they get to the playground (older kids tend to go later).
Go to places designed for the younger set. |