I secretly want a "take charge" husband

[Anonymous]

I wish DH was less wishy washy.
Sort of yearn for almost a bossy man (who is reasonable and kind).
Am I nuts?

[Anonymous]

Stop bossing him around.

[Anonymous]

Are you a troll or the same poster as the "perfect on paper DH but not in love with him"?

This is kind of like a man saying "I want a gorgeous wife with a perfect body but also loving, kind, makes 6 figures, and able to keep house and kids in perfect order without me having to help."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you a troll or the same poster as the "perfect on paper DH but not in love with him"?

This is kind of like a man saying "I want a gorgeous wife with a perfect body but also loving, kind, makes 6 figures, and able to keep house and kids in perfect order without me having to help."

Not a troll. Don't want him to be handsome or rich.

[Anonymous]

Tell him you are done being at the helm and that it's his turn. If he does step up you can NOT bitch about decisions that he is making. If you don't do this it can lead into you thinking about him as one of your DC and you may loose sexual attraction to him.

[Anonymous]

My dad seems wishy washy but that's because my mother always complains about any decision he'd make, so he refused to make any after a while. Make sure that when your husband makes a decision you are enthusiastic and follow through on it. Don't encourage him to decide where to go for dinner and then say you're not in the mood for Thai, or go but then refuse to eat or something.

[Anonymous]

Alpha male

[Anonymous]

I am the "perfect on paper" OP. I know what you are talking about of course! lol

[Anonymous]

OP, I do too. My husband is great though, and I try to remember the grass isn't greener.

[Anonymous]

When I met DH back in college he was like this. I would ask "what do you want for dinner?" And he would say "whatever you want is fine." I would say "you MUST have some leaning toward a preference." And only after telling him that I don't want to always be the decision maker over and over did he become decisive. Luckily we are very much on the same page in the house. He came from a family where his mom was flighty and his dad criticized whatever his mom (and his siblings) did, so I think it was just easier to go with the flow and keep the peace.

Just say something. Tell him what you want. But don't then steamroll is ideas or preferences. Make sure to listen to him.

[Anonymous]

Bossy, reasonable and kind typically aren't found in the same person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH was less wishy washy.
Sort of yearn for almost a bossy man (who is reasonable and kind).
Am I nuts?

You want a head of household. It's actually quite nice, and sexy. You are not nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH was less wishy washy.
Sort of yearn for almost a bossy man (who is reasonable and kind).
Am I nuts?

You want a head of household. It's actually quite nice, and sexy. You are not nuts.

Let me revise. Bossy is not HoH material. Bossy is annoying at best, unbearable most of the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH was less wishy washy.
Sort of yearn for almost a bossy man (who is reasonable and kind).
Am I nuts?

You want a head of household. It's actually quite nice, and sexy. You are not nuts.

Not OP, but yes!!

I have had some success in making DH more "take charge". Whenever we're asked for a question or decision, I let him say yes. I defer to him. Once I've done it enough, it means he's actively thinking about making a decision before asked.

[Anonymous]

Heheh. You "make" him take charge.

Women are nuts.