FIL spending down assets for nursing care----guidance?

[Anonymous]

Not sure if this should be here or in money and finances. FIL has been in very bad health and we've been trying to get him into some sort of assisted living situation closer to us for years, but he has been very reluctant. He has severe heart problems and has not been going to drs or taking care of himself. He ended up in the hospital and was basically referred to hospice care and we were told he would be very lucky to live another year (but who knows). He is on oxygen, no longer mobile and basically requires round the clock care. If we were to take him into our home he would still need day nurses and a lot of assistance. We had a toddler , another child on the way and both WOH full time (and have to stay in our very small house). Basically we were told his only option is self-pay nursing care . Medicare and Tricare (his insurrance) will not cover it. He was going to get a few weeks for rehab but doesn't qualify because he is not well enough for PT etc. We have had him moved to a nursing home near us (moving from MD to VA which may have been a mistake). Our thought is he will be kept comfortable and we can visit often. He does not have a lot of assets-----he has enough to cover maybe 3 or 4 months tops and when we sell him home (on which he still owes a lot) he may have enough for 3 or 4 more months. We understand at some point after extinguishing his assets he will qualify for Medicaid which may help support nursing care somewhere. He is also a veteran and we are looking into going to the VA for help but understand that will take a minimum of 6 months, maybe more. Has anyone BTDT or do you have guidance, resources or advice? The social workers at the hospital and through the one hospice we talked to have not been very helpful. DH does have POA so can help facilitate some of the clearning of house and sale and paying bills. FIL seems accepting of his situation but has always been clueless about finances. We are a little lost.

[Anonymous]

We did it for my MIL. Basically once they have under $2500, then you can apply for state long term care medicaid that will cover it. If the current nursing home takes medicaid, they will probably keep him medicaid pending after his money runs out. They will take all but $75 of his social security check and other income so by clothing and other future things he needs now (i.e furniture for nursing home, tv, anything to make him comfortable). We didn't find much help anywhere. We cared for her for 6 months in our home but it was too much for me.

There are a few VA nursing homes as well as some type of financial assistance monthly but it isn't much. http://www.va.gov/geriatrics/guide/longtermcare/Paying_for_Long_Term_Care.asp

[Anonymous]

Getti g Medicaid is not easy, you need to find a qualified social worker to talk to. He can Not just spend his assets down and automatically qualify because he has no money.
Medicaid looks at what assets you have and what you would have had recently he cannot gift his house to someone and then say he has no money trying to sell it when it's underwater is going to be a difficult situation you need to talk to an expert.