Grandparents and sleeping babies

[Anonymous]

How concerned would you be if grandma, while babysitting, fell asleep while holding a 6 month old baby in the glider?

[Anonymous]

Depends on how she's holding the baby. Football hold? Is the baby over her shoulder?
My mom used to sleep while holding my son. I wasn't confortable with it, but she was a nursery nurse and showed me how she did it. She was leaned back so baby couldn't fall off. I ended up sleeping with baby like that too.

[Anonymous]

How concerned would you be if your husband or partner fell asleep with a 6 month old in a glider? This would not concern me at all.

[Anonymous]

I do it all the time. I end up rocking myself to sleep, before baby. Im ok with it

[Anonymous]

Not the slightest bit.

[Anonymous]

It wouldn't bother me, but if it bothers you mention it to her.

[Anonymous]

This is actually a big suffocation risk. Bed sharing is so much safer.

[Anonymous]

I would be concerned about SIDS. I had a friend who did this, I dont remember how old the baby was to be honest so may have been slightly younger. Either way, she was holding baby in a glider, baby fell asleep, so did she. When she woke up baby was dead.

I would be ok with somone watching my baby sleeping if the baby was, Baby needs to be in its own sleeping place though.

[Anonymous]

I think its one of the few moments of ultimate utopia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be concerned about SIDS. I had a friend who did this, I dont remember how old the baby was to be honest so may have been slightly younger. Either way, she was holding baby in a glider, baby fell asleep, so did she. When she woke up baby was dead.

I would be ok with somone watching my baby sleeping if the baby was, Baby needs to be in its own sleeping place though.

This! I have heard to many sad stories. Stories of people dropping the baby, rolling over the baby, or the baby getting trapped between the mattress in bed. I'm fine with naps when baby is sleeping, but they need to be sure baby is in crib.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be concerned about SIDS. I had a friend who did this, I dont remember how old the baby was to be honest so may have been slightly younger. Either way, she was holding baby in a glider, baby fell asleep, so did she. When she woke up baby was dead.

I would be ok with somone watching my baby sleeping if the baby was, Baby needs to be in its own sleeping place though.

This! I have heard to many sad stories. Stories of people dropping the baby, rolling over the baby, or the baby getting trapped between the mattress in bed. I'm fine with naps when baby is sleeping, but they need to be sure baby is in crib.

None of those things are SIDS

[Anonymous]

It's not what you would want to happen, obviously. It is a risk to the baby and is not a good idea.

But we all know it happens frequently. How did Grandma treat the situation? Was she upset about it or think it was funny? Did she tell you about it, or did you walk in and find her sleeping there? How long was she babysitting for? How frequently does she babysit for you? Was it late at night?

I guess I would want to know a lot of things before I'd give advice on proceeding. I think I would be worried about my baby's safety, but I don't think it's necessarily fair to be angry at Grandma. These things happen. If she recognized the risk of it, then I'd just share her concern and help her find some ideas for ways to avoid doing it in the future (reading, having a light on, whatever she needs). If she didn't seem concerned about it, then I would want to discuss it further with her to make sure she understands that this isn't okay on a regular basis and that it does pose a major risk.

Grandparents are older and may be more likely to fall asleep, but I think that parents are usually more at risk because they are more exhausted from watching the kid overnight. I also believe that parents are a little more tuned into the baby and thus may be more likely to wake up if there was a dangerous situation. I don't think it solves the problem, but I would be a little less worried about a parent doing this than a grandparent.

If it was at night or after a very long period of babysitting, maybe you can avoid these situations in the future to help Grandma. Maybe you can encourage Grandma to put the baby down in the crib as soon as possible so as to avoid this, but I know a lot of babies need rocking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be concerned about SIDS. I had a friend who did this, I dont remember how old the baby was to be honest so may have been slightly younger. Either way, she was holding baby in a glider, baby fell asleep, so did she. When she woke up baby was dead.

I would be ok with somone watching my baby sleeping if the baby was, Baby needs to be in its own sleeping place though.

This! I have heard to many sad stories. Stories of people dropping the baby, rolling over the baby, or the baby getting trapped between the mattress in bed. I'm fine with naps when baby is sleeping, but they need to be sure baby is in crib.

None of those things are SIDS

True, but many times that get lumped in with SIDS because it isn't always obvious what caused the death. And there's a sense in some cases that what is labeled SIDS was actually suffocation (whether in a situation like this or just a baby having trouble breathing for some other reason, many times not totally understood).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not what you would want to happen, obviously. It is a risk to the baby and is not a good idea.

But we all know it happens frequently. How did Grandma treat the situation? Was she upset about it or think it was funny? Did she tell you about it, or did you walk in and find her sleeping there? How long was she babysitting for? How frequently does she babysit for you? Was it late at night?

I guess I would want to know a lot of things before I'd give advice on proceeding. I think I would be worried about my baby's safety, but I don't think it's necessarily fair to be angry at Grandma. These things happen. If she recognized the risk of it, then I'd just share her concern and help her find some ideas for ways to avoid doing it in the future (reading, having a light on, whatever she needs). If she didn't seem concerned about it, then I would want to discuss it further with her to make sure she understands that this isn't okay on a regular basis and that it does pose a major risk.

Grandparents are older and may be more likely to fall asleep, but I think that parents are usually more at risk because they are more exhausted from watching the kid overnight. I also believe that parents are a little more tuned into the baby and thus may be more likely to wake up if there was a dangerous situation. I don't think it solves the problem, but I would be a little less worried about a parent doing this than a grandparent.

If it was at night or after a very long period of babysitting, maybe you can avoid these situations in the future to help Grandma. Maybe you can encourage Grandma to put the baby down in the crib as soon as possible so as to avoid this, but I know a lot of babies need rocking.

+1

[Anonymous]

OP here. It was a daytime visit for about 3 hours--grandma begged to be allowed to babysit at her place which doesn't have a crib or anything. She insisted she'd hold him while he slept (which seemed fine because it's what we do for many naps) and then told us about dozing off matter of factly afterwards. First, she said he'd slept while they were on the bed (I don't know if she was lying down or sitting or what) and then they moved to their glider/rocker, which is where they "napped together". I was a little taken aback and didn't know what to say, and she said "Oh, don't worry, nothing would have happened!"

I felt weird about it at the time, but honestly didn't know how concerned I should be or what to say in the moment. I wanted to get a reality/normality check here.

Thanks for all the feedback!